Whats you feeling on kids throwing things and climbing on the furniture?

[CharleeheartsherChains]

My children's behaviour has greatly improved for a while now after implimenting the 1 2 3 Magic strategy but one thing i have never been to get them to stop doing is throwing and climbing everything.

Throwing - They both throw everything, clothes/ toys/ books/ cups/ plates ect, i am so sick of having this smack me in the face becuase ds1 or ds2 have lobbed it accross the room. Im pretty sure if i could get ds1 to stop doing it ds2 would follow suit. I do the 1 2 3 thing with it but they never stop and just keep doing it, any ideas?

Climbing - This is the furniture, tables., chairs, sofa ect anything they can get on, they usually run across the coffe table then onto the sofa then up onto the PC desk. Again i have counted them and punished them for it but its have never stopped them doing it.
They play loads outside and places where they can climb and throw so im not sure what to do about it. Any advice mych appreciated. They are 2 1/2 and 4.

I've got a no throwing rule. Primarily because as they grow older, they get stronger and whilst a 2 year old probably can't do much damage by throwing, a 4 year old can. My nearly 5 year old DS still throws things occasionally, but I'm fairly strict about it and he knows it's not allowed.

Climbing I'm a bit less consistent about. If it's not dangerous or likely to cause damage, I'll sometimes turn a blind eye.

absolute no-no in my house.

throwing things.......if they throw it at someone, it goes in the bin. they learn pretty quick that throwing it means that, and they generally have only ever thrown something once!

as for climbing......they get a warning, if it continues, then another warning, after the third try then they get removed from the room and put behind the stair gate (when we had one).

climbing in the garden was allowed, as was certain areas n the house, and they soon learnt wear and how and if I was ok about it.

well, except for the houdini DS2.........he was a law unto himself, and stopping him made it more attractive, so I let him climb everywhere bar the unit in the lounge (contains glass so dangerous), and just watched him like a hawk until he bored of it.

mine don't climb much since I removed the carpet

a very HARD landing indeed

I have a no throwing rule. Sooner or later someone gets properly hurt or things get broken. It's potentially destructive and socially unacceptable.

Climbing - mine can climb on the sofa and the beds but certainly not tables, desks etc. My house is a home but it's not a jungle gym.

If they are still climbing and throwing at 4 then they are going to get a shock at school - you need to get REALLY tough about it now. If they are about to throw something you bellow "NO" in your scariest voice. If they then throw it you can pick up the thrower and remove them from the room. You may end up having to do this repeatedly but sooner or later they get the message. Same for climbing - otherwise you are going to have either a lot of trips to A&E or never be invited to anyone else's house.

all absolute no-no's in our house.

ds1 gets ONE warning. if he throws something I tell him that we do not throw in our house. if he cannot look after his toys/books/shoes etc then I will give them to someone who will.
if said item is thrown again it is taken away.

if I ever catch them climbing on furniture they are removed and again, given a warning that we do NOT climb on things.
a repeat offence means they are taken out of the room until they calm down

Hmm - can you put them straight onto a three for it? Might that work?

Same as thisisyesterday.

Hmmmm now i thought i was being tough on DS1 (4) for his throwing and climbing, i am pretty sure thats where DS2 gets it from as he copies everything ds1 does.

I have started throwing things in the bin that have been thrown and they always get removed on count 3.

Im pretty sure he doesn't do it at Nursery though so thats a good thing.

I guess its a case of just keep going, however DS1's behavious has been foul this past few weeks, he seems dead set on minding people up and he is very sly about it especially to ds2 and DN. When i tell him off he usually grins at me........ I still follow through the punsihment though.

ive never tried the counting thing as ive seen parents stop and the child continue counting. im at a total loss as my 4.5yr old is normally quite good but has recently taken to laughing and or sticking up for my 18month old when shes told off!!!

shouting gets me down and hurts my throat but dont know what else to do it seems to sink in at the time but then is all forgotten in a flash. dont kids who are always shouted at end up just shouting back or repeating what uve sed to a sibling or friend??

no throwing at all

they do climb on the arm of one couch and jump onto it

but they know thats allowed

If you use counting, count down not up, then you can't carry on, nor can they!

sos im new at this what is DS2 and DS1....DN? i'm not worthy , i know........

Dear Son 1 and 2

Dear Niece.

I find the counting works, 98% of thing i get to 2 and ds has stopped, it doesn't work so well with ds2 but like i say he follows ds1 so if ds1 stops doing something he will to.

They are good at school but i think thats becuase they have alot to do all the time.

catertonk here

counting works if they know you will carry out a threat when you get to 3 or whatever number you have chosen.

ie, I would say "DS1 I am going to count to 3. if you haven't got off the table by then I will take you off"
then I count.
if he wants to carry on counting that's up to him, but when I get to 3 he would be removed and taken out of the room

God, i can't stand throwing. One of my nicest friend's kid does it incessantly and she doen't seem to mind it. He has broken some of ds's toys in the paast.

Climbing in this house is okay on sofas and beds, but not on tables.

Hmmmm, DC3 is a thrower, he just loses his rag and throws things. He is finally outgrowing it, at age 4y+8m. Tried all sorts of other things to stop it (as described here), but when he's in a rage, he can't think except to express how angry he is. Only now with some emotional maturity are those various other tactics working.

Climbing I think you have to just hover and put a stop to it the moment it starts (physically restrain them). Mine are allowed a certain amount of furniture climbing in our house. They stop when I tell them to think of the right threat, though.

Okay No throwing in this house as at all. Outside pls in the garden or park with throwing toys. Not, great Uncles visiting from present that he only just brought DS the day before [angry at playdate friend who broke it!)
Jumping on sofa okay as I hate it and hope DH will agree to a new one soon.
No jumping on leather bucket seat (I love them)
No jumping on furniture in other peoples houses unless the parents thinks it okay.
So that, Terry, is the result fron Norway

Honestly?

It depends on how tired I am how active I am on this.

There's a no rule to both but if I am shatterd (like today....) things go awry

If your kids arelike mine its just constant: I've been known to take them to the green every day of a hols and make them lap it 100 times each for five minutes peace

Counting is the only vague success we've ahd here of any method. And I domean any with full EdPSych input sigh!

Zero tolerance for throwing here.

Climbing and bouncing is tolerated unless it starts looking too dangerous. NOt allowed in other peoples' houses though. I guess that's a bit inconsistent.

mloo, and others with persistent throwers when angry... have you tried giving them a specific thing they CAN throw, and somewhere to throw it? ie, pillows onto the bed when really angry, so it gets it out of their system but prevents anything and everything being thrown?

Not sure how that would work, thisisyesterday. Suppose DS becomes angry when playing with Lego with others; the others ignore him telling them what to do, so finally he throws lego.

Am I supposed to train him into leaving the room where he has been playing, and finding his designated-ok-to-throw object, and throwing it at the desigated-ok-to-be-thrown-at furniture? It'lll never do, the throwing is an instant release/need. He's only 4, he can't compose himself that well.

Throwing completely unacceptable here. Had a short stage of throwing at about 3...wht ever was thrown was taken off ds and put ontop of our very tall freezer for a day.
Never done it since.

Climbing on tables again a nono just because they need to be taught to respect other epoples belongings...including thier own, the furniture can get damaged...and i have saved hard for my belongings and some one could get hurt so absolutely no climbing either.

However, cushions on the sofa regularly come off due to the crocodiles we have circulating the living room...we need the cusions as stepping stones!!! Imaginative play is encouraged to an extent but is cafefully monitored.

You can fall into the trap imho of allowing them to do this stuff in their own home...then mixed messages when you go to someone elses house where it is not acceptable.

No throwing.

Throwing first time (not at someone) means that DS has to say sorry and then pick it up (it's very tedious). If he does it a second time it goes up somewhere high, in sight but out of reach.

Throwing at someone intentionally gets a slap (sorry) and he has to say sorry to the person.

DS is 2yrs 2months and doesn't have much language yet. I'm hoping to substitue the slapping for something more complex when he can understand but for now I'm happy with it.

mloo yes, that's exactly how it works. it isn't going to be an instant success, but you help him realise when he starts feeling angry, and when that happens he can go and let off steam.

it's worked fabulously for a friend of mine whose nearly 4 yr old was getting into a lot of scraps with her partners 4 yr old.
they have a no fighting rule, but they have some inflatable toys that they are allowed to go and hit and punch if they need to.

obviously it isn't something that just works overnight, but you can get them to gradually change their behaviour and channel their anger into something more suitable