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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

6 yr old dd wants to be vegetarian, crying about eating meat,advice ??

74 replies

MerryChatkins · 31/12/2008 20:21

Not sure where to post this really, maybe health too ?

We're not vegetarian, but my 6 yr old dd has announced over christmas that she wants to be one. We have a friend of mine staying with us at the moment who is veggie, and I gather that dd asked her why, and she explained about animals being treated really badly.

This has made dd refuse to eat meat over christmas, no meat in her christmas dinner at all! I am fine with it in theory, but I am worried she is a bit young, and also I am not sure what or how to cook for her ! THB it has thrown me a bit, and as she is skinny anyway, I am concerned about doing it the right way, and don't have a clue.

Would you insist she eats meat or hope its a phase and will pass ? Or should I be encouraging her to pursue her own ideals and values on this ?

She broke down and cried at the dinner table yesterday as I had forgotten and cooked her favourite sausage mash and veg, and she cried because she said she wanted to eat the sausage but 'felt too guilty'. Tonight she was relieved to see her jacket potato and beans had no sausage in it !

I am just surprised she has stuck with it this long really, and not sure what to do. Dh is a big meat eater and thinks we should encourage her to eat it again. Anyone else any experience of vegetarian kids ??

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Miyazaki · 31/12/2008 20:43

That's an extrapolation too far for me Franny, but agree wrong thread.

FrannyandZooey · 31/12/2008 20:45

well it sounds really encouraging merryc
i think it will work out fine

miya yes it was a stretch, but you see my point
maybe

thisisyesterday · 31/12/2008 20:45

my fave cookbooks atm are rose elliott ones. they have a lot of info in them on how to ensure you're getting a balanced diet and the recipes themselves include a lot of things that many other veggie cookbooks seem to just forget about.
i mean, a fab range of meals based on different grains and pulses, with explanations on why each is good for you and stuff like that.

Original poster

MerryChatkins · 31/12/2008 20:47

thankyou thisisyesterday, I'll look them up

OP posts:

Hulababy · 31/12/2008 20:48

I would give DD a bit more unbiased information. Explain about different farming methods and about more ethical ways of producing meat as well.

Then let her make as an informed a choice as she can at 6y.

I would not force her to eat meat either. But I don't like the idea of her sat there wanting to eat the sausages, but feeling guilty.

I don;t eat meat as I don't like it. I'd have no problems with my own 6y making a choice like this, so long as I felt it was an informed choice.

27 · 31/12/2008 20:50

We are a vegetarian household (and healthy!)
My oldest DD is a similar age to yours and I think she is old enough to decide for herself if she wants to eat meat or not. She has decided not to, but if she were to chose to eat meat now I wouldnt stand in her way, as I think she is able to make a reasonable choice.

6 is fairly young to be making big choices, but as this is one that will improve her health I wouldnt fight it. It is healthier to be vegetarian than it is to eat meat, so I would have no qualms about allowing a meat eating child to become vegetarian (as long as they had a good vegetarian diet).

I suspect that forcing her to eat meat would be very counterproductive.

Original poster

MerryChatkins · 31/12/2008 20:51

Thanks hulababy - I see your point.

Perhaps we'll need to do some research together. It was not nice to see her in tears over her dinner. I wasn't trying to force her, I just sat next to her and asked exactly what my friend had said to her to make her worry so much. She kept saying nothing, but I think it is that the animals have had horrible lives. Maybe will have to chat to friend more while she is still here.

OP posts:

Hulababy · 31/12/2008 20:53

Just 'cs I am curious and nosey - would vegetarian families be happy for their 6y child to decide to start eating meat?

FrannyandZooey · 31/12/2008 20:53

useful links here i think

i'm sorry people are getting upset about her sitting sadly over the sausages
i think this is a really positive thing she has done here
she is taking some of life's big issues here and grappling with them
her own pleasure v. her ethical beliefs - it's brilliant! shows a real maturity and a determination
i think young people learning to deal with this kind of thing is great
merryc you should be proud of yourself for the open mind you are keeping about this

MrsDoylesMole · 31/12/2008 20:55

My dd1 also decided to become veggie about 8 months ago(she was 6) after she asked me what ham was made from and i told her it was pig .I am veggie and dp and dd2 are happy to eat mainly vegetarian meals. She doesn't miss meat at all but however occasionally ask for fish .

piscesmoon · 31/12/2008 20:55

I would just tell her what I tell mine-firstly they have to eat all vegetables and they have to eat vegetarian meals like nut roast. If they are prepared to eat a fully balanced vegetarian diet, I have no problems.If they are going to be 'picky' I do.

FrannyandZooey · 31/12/2008 20:55

Hula, no i wouldn't, because i believe eating meat is wrong
i respect YOUR right to decide whether you eat it or not - it isn't illegal - but it is the wrong choice for me and for my family
if i was christian i would bring my children up to follow christian beliefs and only when they were older would i give the choice for them to follow their own path
not age 6 - at age 6 moral issues that i feel strongly about, i make the decisions

thisisyesterday · 31/12/2008 20:57

hulababy, i would be happy for ds1 to eat meat if he chose to. in fact, he has tried it once (he is almost 4) but he didn't like it.

I've always said I would never force any of my beliefs onto my children, and I wouldn't.
I am very honest with them about where meat comes from and have told ds1 that if he wants to eat meat then he can.
atm he chooses not to

Hulababy · 31/12/2008 20:58

But why is a child old enough at 6y to decide not to eat meat, but a child at 6y is not old enough to decide that they do want to eat meat?

Sorry...just musing (am very unbiased either way as I don't eat meat, but don't have any particular moral issues over it, I just ensure I buy organic/free range where I can, etc for DH and DD). Ought to have new thread though - sorry for hijack.

Original poster

MerryChatkins · 31/12/2008 20:58

thankyou for your compliments F&Z , I do feel proud of her maturity and sensitivity on this. Especially as she has understood where sausages etc come from for a long time, and hasn;t minded until now.

Can i ask, were your children vegetarian from birth ?

OP posts:

Yurtgirl · 31/12/2008 20:59

Hula - in answer to your q - No!
When they are older, say 12 I be fine-ish if they choose to eat meat at someone else's house/restaurant etc.

Im not happy about them eating it at home though as mine has been a veggie kitchen for 16 years (albeit in multiple different homes!) and will stay that way whilst I still have my marbles!

I think 6 is too young to decide to be a meat eater tbh - A fine age to become veggie though

piscesmoon · 31/12/2008 21:00

If 6 is fine to be a veggie it is fine to eat meat!

Original poster

MerryChatkins · 31/12/2008 21:00

Not a hijack at all hulababy - I am glad this has turned into an interesting discussion. I nearly put it in health as I was conceredn about what to cook her for health reasons, but there is so much more to it than that, lots to consider.

OP posts:

Yurtgirl · 31/12/2008 21:01

thisisyesterday · 31/12/2008 21:01

my children have both been vegetarian from birth.
ds2 is also egg and dairy intolerant so basically on a vegan diet (apart from honey!)

Lovesdogsandcats · 31/12/2008 21:04

Why is this a problem when for every meat dish there is now a veggie/Quorn alternative..thats IF you want to go down the meat replacement road...makes cooking meat and non meat meals easier...eg sausage and mash...just do couple extra Quorn sausage for the veggie

melpomene · 31/12/2008 21:04

Excellent advice from FrannyandZooey. I agree to let her be vegetarian, but make sure she eats a variety of sources of protein, veggies etc. My sister became vegetarian (in a meat-eating household) at age 6. 30-odd years later she is healthy and mum to 3 healthy (and much taller than average) children who have been veggie all their lives. My dds and I are also veggies and thriving on it. We have things such as ommelettes, quiche, chickpea curry, pasta, pizza, lentil dal, baked beans, quorn, spaghetti bolognaise made with veggie mince, stir-fry with tofu, and dd2 would live on peanut butter and jelly sandwiches if I let her.

FrannyandZooey · 31/12/2008 21:07

well obv people make the decisions that are right for their family - but for me eating meat and not eating meat are not two equal moral choices, so it doesn't work like that for me

i understand others have different beliefs obviously

merryc yes vegetarian from birth
ds2 is only 5 months old but ds1 is 5.5 and (fingers crossed) v healthy

Original poster

MerryChatkins · 31/12/2008 21:07

Thanks, I will start trying to cook some of those things ! I think I;m lucky in that all my kids eat lots of fruit and veg already, none of them are fussy eaters, so it shouldnt be too hard to adjust things slightly.

OP posts:

Hulababy · 31/12/2008 21:07

Yurtgirl - \link{http://www.casio.co.uk/Products/Musical%20Instruments/Privia/PX-720C5/At_a_Glance/\this is DD's paino - PX720C in the black ash; it is the compact size so not as wide)

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