2.5 yr old would rather freeze than put coat on - do I let her?!!!!!!!

[girliefriend]

Deep sigh, have battled with dd over the last few weeks everytime we go out as she refuses to put a coat on unless I force it on her (which results in mass screaming) Have kind of given up now and think eventually she will realise she is cold and that maybe a coat is a good idea? What do you all think?! Xx

Let her decide. I always did and my three didn't die of frostbite - in fact they often voluntarily chooses to wear a coat these days - they are 11, 8 and 6.
Be prepared to blank the tutting old ladies who think you are being cruel though.

What LGP said. Don't make it a battle, just say 'OK, well I'll carry it for you and if you want it, tell me.' Mine usually ended up wanting to put it on some time during the outing.

Is there something about the coat that she doesnt like?
Maybe she'd wear a thick fleece zip up top or a jumper instead?

If not, then I agree, just let it go. She'll give in eventually!

is the coat comfy for her?

have you asked her why she won't wear it?

maybe if your house is warm and you're putting the coat on her inside the house she feels too stuffy and hot?

Yeah am going to look for fleecy top, the coat is not overly bulky or annoying in anyway that I can see! And am getting lots of funny looks from people who are obviously thinking 'that child should have a coat on - she'll freeze!' Ok will carry on (trying) not to let it get to me! Xx

oh and by the by she will put it on for other people, nursery, grandparents etc - just not me!

My dd is 2.10 and can be a nightmare about keeping her coat on. I have bought a hooded fleece jumber and put it on her when she plays up as she can't take it off herself.

My dd1 is the same, not the 'is' rather than 'was'

I keep thinking that she'll grow out of it and that after she has frozen a few times, she'll regret it and put her coat on.

Nope

She's 8!

Sorry, that wasn't very helpful was it?!

I have just the same problem with ds 2.6 - even today when it was p'ing down with rain! after 10 minutes stuggling and getting cross I just let him get on with it. TBH he's that strong that I couldn't force it on him even if I wanted to!

Ah - if she'll wear it for other people then I'd say it's just a power play. I have a DD the same age and she'll do things for random strangers that she won't do for me. I find not reacting to be the quickest solution.

She tried the, "No coat!" thing and was most unimpressed when I said okay and told her that I'd carry it and to tell me when she wanted it.

My DD 3.5 is the same. She won't even wear cardigans, so is often outside with short sleeves. I have stopped caring that people may think I am being neglectful, especially as I am usually well wrapped-up. I try to persuade her it is nice to be warm, but she won't be convinced by me or anyone else.

Hi I used to have this battle with my dd and then thought to myself "choose your battles" and I didn't choose this one. If they get cold enough they will put it on, especially if you haven't made a big deal out of it.

Ds can be like this sometimes. I wait until we are going somewhere he really wants to go and then say he can't go unless he puts his coat on. Do that a few times in a row and they forget and put it on as a matter of course.

My 3 yr old is the same. Don't make it a battle, it'll only make things worse. Take the coat with you, ignore the tutting of strangers, try and find a lovely warm jumper that she will wear e.g. my dd will always wear her Mr Bump sweatshirt with hood.

oh am so glad am not the only one - good ols mumsnet! It is powerplay Im sure but doesn't it drive you mad?!! Def am not going to force it on her anymore and will look out for fleecy top, she also won't wear, cardigans (apart from one really manky stained one!), tights, jeans, hats, scarves, gloves, jumpers - which basically leaves us with just soft trousers and plain tops! And I thought having a little girl would be great for dressing up!

oh and have tried the 'ok we won't go out then' line - it works sometimes but these days she has got wise to it and will say 'fine don't care!'

yeah I know and am doin!

Mine is the same so we go out, if she gets cold she asks.

She does get cold and was crying the other day because her hands and ears were so cold but she is so stubborn she would still not give in to putting on any more clothes!

have you tried the 'see if you can put your coat on/do up zip quicker than me/aren't you clever' route yet?

my DD is 12 and stilllllllll won't wear a coat.. or even a jumper or fleece to school... don't remember it being a problem when she was young......
like the others have said.. I pick my battles..

when DS was this age I used the 'Whatever you do don't wear your coat,,, No don't wear it, no no you can't wear it, oh you want to wear it oh well I suppose you can " line

tbh though ds wasn't too bad about a coat at 2 years old and would hav e struggled to get it off in his own once it was on anyway,

Now at 4 yrs old he absolutely refuses to wear one most of the time. I half-heartedly try and persuade him then just carry it. The problem with ds is that he will be shivering with chattering teeth and still insist he isn't cold [hmmm] He does eventually say of he is cold but by then he is so cold that the coat doesn't warm him up enough and I then get him moaning that he is cold even with the coat on aghhhhh

Thanks for this thread I still have this issue with ds and he's 7! I keep harping on much for thesame eason someone mentioning the tutting ladies further up the thread.

Hmmm, very good thread, will watch with interest.