Why oh why did I start with this **%%$!! dummy - just gone back in for 100th time

[sunshine17]

DD1 wouldn't take a dummy - and looking back now I'm glad because my friends with babies her age are still trying to wean them off.

In a moment of madness I started with DD2 who is now 8 weeks old.

I've just gone back into her room for what must be the 10th time to 'plug' it back in to try and get her to have her lunchtime nap. She screams and wakes herself up if it's not in.

I so so regret starting as I can see it becoming a big (bigger!) problem. In fact the few times she's been in such a deep sleep that she doesn't want it she has slept so well.

What can I do - please help. The other problem is I can't let her cry for too long as it wakes DD1 (19 months).

[smellyeli]

So back to the original subject - we're doing pretty well now, and with lots of cuddles at bedtime no crying at all when I put her down tonight! PLus she is leeping two to three hours at lunchtime, and going much longer at night so we are all happier - I have more energy for my 3 year old, and more time (when she is napping well) to do good stuff with him rather than being constantly distracted.....

I've decided not to get rid of the plugs completely as they are still handy when we are out and about and she needs a little nap (ie. soft play with loads of noisy boys charging around this morning) I may use one of them as target practice to encourage my three year old to hit the water, though - thanks for that tip!

[MatNanPlus]

SO glad to hear all is going well SmellyEli

[pudding25]

Well done. It is such a feeling of achievement! So proud of my baby pudding. She now goes straight down, fingers in mouth and off to sleep! And she did 2 hrs solid at lunchtime today in her cot - unheard of! I had to go in and check several times as I was worried and I took her temperature!
Not getting my hopes up yet though...she will probably start teething next week and be up all night.

Not chucked out the dummys either....too scared to but think I will give them to my friend who's baby is a dummy addict and keep 1 in case of emergency!

[TinkerBellesMum]

I think that usually when a child isn't finding their own routine (having seen this myself) it is because the parents aren't letting them. I know one little girl who is 4.8 and still goes to bed at whatever unearthly time her parents do. She is always angry and irritable annoying little brat and would happily go to bed a lot sooner if her parents put her there. But they have never allowed her to find a routine for herself so she is totally out of control routine.

[pudding25]

Tinkerbellesmum I do agree with you to some extent. I am a primary teacher and the out of control children are the ones who have no routine whatsoever, go to bed whenever they feel like it (they don't want to go to bed so their parents let them stay up) and have no rules or boundaries at home.
It is a real shame for the children.

[Milsy]

Hi everyone, the dummy issue always gets everybody stirred up doesn't it? I say that parenting is both hard and rewarding and we each must make choices based on our individual children and the needs of our family. We have a dummy. We also have a Sleepytot Comforter that we can put the dummies on and lo can find the dummies on that. That has worked for us since we're all comforted and all sleep well. x

[angel1976]

We ditched the dummy as well and it took DS 2 days to adjust and now he goes for his naps with a little grumbling and that's it! We even travelled long haul (12.5 hours) without it! We did take it out at one point as he was getting really upset (two babies who are both sensitive to noises next to each other is NOT a good idea!) but he wouldn't have it... But I agree, it's up to the individual baby. My LO never really took to a dummy and it always dropped out of his mouth so we are glad to ditch it now.

[pudding25]

milsy well said. I wish that DD's sleep had not been disturbed by the dummy. I think I loved it more than she did - and I had all the accessories-dummy bag, dummy steriliser, all varieties of colours...

We are now over 2 wks dummy free. Within 5 days of giving up the dummy, DD started sleeping through the night.

However, she is now sucking on her fingers the whole time...

[sunshine17]

Hi everyone, just got a chance to catch up with all these posts. I think giving up the dummy would give her a better, more undisturbed nights sleep - it has been useful in some respects but 2 weeks on from my initial thread I haven't been able to ditch it.

In fact she wakes up after 40ish mins from a nap (because it's fallen out) and I can't then get her back to sleep - so in the sling she goes because DD1 is demanding to attention/feeding.....

My problem is still I can't let her cry for to long (at all!) during the night as it waits DD1 up and then it is just a nightmare as she is such a sensitive sleeper that any disruption to her routine sends to spin everything out of control - day naps etc.

p.s. greenmonkies just caught up with your thread (looks like you were trying to catch me out - why??) the reason I went back IN to the bedroom to put her dummy back in - even though she sleeps right next to me - was because it was a day nap..........

[Clio197]

Sunshine17 - I have the same problem, well kind of, OH drives alot for work, so needs to get sleep or could be dangerous now although my 19 week old baby (SHOCK HORROR) sleeps in his own room (Note, has done since 13 weeks..) his cries still wake OH up if they go on for to long.

I planned to ditch it yesturday, but caved in at 2am when he woke and poped it in, silence and sleep immediately!! Amazing really, but not very good for the dithing of the dummy plan.

What gets me - last two days hes been put in his cot awake, as always, with no dummy, not a peep out of him, straight to sleep!! So I know its possible, he just cant settle in the middle of the night.

I think both of us would be happy to get any tips people have with middle of the nigth waking?

[pudding25]

I found that once she got rid of the dummy during the day and going to bed in the evening, she only woke the once in the night to be fed (until a few days later, she gave that up). I was only feeding her once anyway, but she had been waking every 2 hrs looking for dummy.

I know you are worried about the crying but thankfully, we did not have too much crying. Dummy was ditched within 3 days so not that long and definitely worth it in the long run.

[Clio197]

Just as i posted that DS woke up, I went in and put his blankie think up by his face, shhh'd him, held his hand for a bit, stroked his face, and left. Im gonna go back in after 4 mins and do the same thing. Although hes crying, ht goes quiet for periods, then starts up again!! Urghh!

[pudding25]

That's pretty much along the lines of what we did. Hope it goes well.

[Philpot]

Both my DDs use them, both have about 6 each all over their cot so they can put a hand on one if they wake up, I found that much easier to deal with than going in and out. However, at 8weeks it was a bit of a pain, I would just roll over and stick the dummy in because the cot was right by the bed.

Has anyone else heard about the study they did showing babies who used dummies at night had a reduced risk of SIDS? Just googled it, here is a link to the article:
www.fsid.org.uk/dummies-press.html

[Philpot]

Sorry by the way, that is not meant to be a guilt trip into using/sticking with dummies, just thought it might be interesting.

[Clio197]

I had read that research acutally. Tho, soon as he was asleep it always fell out, so was only in there for 5mins mabey then out for 4 hours, then he'd wake and have it for another 3mins.

Either way, hes on a sencor mat, so I dont worry toooooooo much... but you always do dont you.

My DS is dummyless, going OK, only 7mins of fussy crying thismorning before he fell asleep for nap.

[pudding25]

Apparently, the FSID research says that if the dummy falls out when they are asleep, it does not matter and not to worry if your baby wont take the dummy. I have also heard that unless someone in your house smokes, then it is fine to get rid of it. If somone smokes, it may be a good idea to keep it for longer.