can't put down my 7 month old

[bumbly]

and today lost it

been a real pain in the %^&% since birth....then found a sort of way of carrying him around but now he is too heavy and i need to put him down and leave him

i need too

he cant sit alone unaided and simply wont entertain himself

then when i am there he ignores me...

when am not there he screams as if tortured...

my mum hasnt helped and hwen went over to her place last week felt mnore exhausted than before as she is so critical

what do i do??...do i put him in nursery for a few days so i can have time to myself???

at wits end

never ending story with this little one

i cant carry him anymore

Oh Bumbly, I've just returned to work (full time) and my LO is with a CM, but I know that feeling of desperation for a breather from the wailing. My dad has been a lifesaver, I haven't always got on well with him, but... Since your mum hasn't been so great, I'd suggest getting out and about. I understand you can't walk easily but presumably you're able to get out somehow as you mention going to your mum's. Places I found helpful included:

local baby groups
activities - music, swimming
National Childbirth Trust (NCT) groups which organise various things including coffee mornings - they can be at different places or at someone's house - people there can often give you tips about where to go
the library - children's library, things to borrow, a different space for baby to explore, maybe playmats to be on, maybe a toy library or groups/activities you could take your child to
As the weather warms up especially, parks

At home, I confess to resorting to putting on Teletubbies for a little while occasionally. It's not infallible but does distract ds sometimes for a few minutes when I need 10 minutes to pull myself together to spend time with him

You can't be perfect and attentive all day every day with no breaks

Hope things improve for you soon

bumbly, my lo has an activity centre thingy, basically he sits in it and he can move himself around to different toys. he's 6m. don't know if you've tried one of those but my lo loves it. it's called a baby einstein activity centre, but you can get them cheap on ebay, different brands are cheaper too.

Ah another thread that brings back memories. I was often tempted to ring up the maternity hospital and ask them why the h* they hadn't remembered to cut off dd's umbilical cord! She just clung to me like a little leech.

a couple of things helped me:

baby groups (even if I ended up with her stuck on my lap, at least I was getting some adult conversation)

insisting that I was going to do certain things- like get myself a cup of coffee at 11- even if she screamed the roof down. I kept telling myself firmly that 5 minutes screaming two or three times a day wasn't actually going to kill her (it hasn't- she's 11). Just a couple of things each day was enough to reassure me that I wasn't totally powerless

singing loudly to myself to cut out the whining

passing her over to dh the moment he got in through the door

having music on a lot of the time

today: hubby and i had to put up a painting

little one was already being a pain all day

we put him on floor literally few cms away from us and we put him down where he could clearly see us

he starts screaming like crazy even though he can perfectly see us

hubby was totally astonished at this spearation anxiety to the extreme!

Oooo dear. It is quite extreme isn't it?! Mine can be the same. He doesn't always scream as soon as I out him down on the floor or in his chair but he whinges and whimpers whilst screwing up his face in a really annoying way! He really screams if I dare sit down whilst holding him, even when I keep him in the same position so his body is straight. He just can't bear not seeing everything and being restricted. It completely baffles me and dh (although dh was the same as a baby). Very tiring!

Anyway, it obviously means that your ds is very attached to you and loves you very much. Try and look at it in a positive way! Apparently, until babies can crawl or walk they are naturally meant to want to be carried by their mum so it satands to reason that he needs you constantly.

I just wish I could sit and cuddle ds, my back is giving out from carrying him around (litterally, I can feel the strain when I pick him up and my arms ache constantly).
Counting down the days til he's mobile!

At least your dh is baffled too. I don't think mine realises how draining it is to be on my own with ds 12 hours a day. I'm exhausted!

get a baby walker, sorry if you've tried this already, too many replies to read all, but it really worked for us

tried them at shop but not interested in a walker - think toys on them dont interest him

today beein with him everysecond till now - then had to go to loo (for a bit longer if you get my gist ;) ) and he screamed so much he got both feet and legs badly twisted on cotbed rails

thought by being with him all morning he'd be better - but actually i think he is worse

thanks Leonie - wow sounds exactly like my lo!

your post has depressed me and also made me feel better at same time - you know what i mean...

tired at fact have months ahead of hell but releif that it ought to end!

some point perhaps

why has noone studied this and come up with some scienitfic advice???????