Which is the easier baby - boy or girl? If you could choose, would you?

[phlossie]

A friend of my mum's had twin girls with her fourth pregnancy - sisters to 3 girls! Apparantly, in the haze of the drugs, hormones etc, she accused the doctor of cutting off her sons' willies!!!

That got me thinking: why do people (eg Victoria Beckham) get so het up about having the other sort to what they've got?

I have on of each (clever, eh??. For some reason I had decided that boys were easier babies than girls, so after a shaky, colicky start, have been really surprised by how delightful my dd (my youngest) is - especially how cuddly she is.

Obviously a lot is down to personality and birth order, but which do you think is easier, boy or girl? If you could choose, would you? And why? Do you think people should be allowed to choose?

[TheHonEnid]

ok well personally I think having one of each doesnt prove anything one way or another

second children are different whether girls or boys

I do think gender differences kick in when a bit older but I htink up until 2 there is very little differnce and certainly not in babies

[peanutbear]

I dont hink you should be able to choose but I always had a secret yearning for a daughter I dont nkow why

I had 2 boys then a little girl the boys are great really funny DS2 is a happy little soul always laughing and getting up to mischief he really makes me laugh

Ds1 has ASD so its hard to compare him but he is helpful and kind but easily very silly

DD is calmer much more laid back she likes being around me and watching whats going on and she like helping with anything your doing

she is by far the easiest child atm but this could be because she is the third or because she is more like me !!!!!

[blueshoes]

I have a girl 4.7 and then a boy 1.7. They seem to have the same determined, take-no-prisoners and sociable personalities but it comes out differently in terms of their priorities, in a way you might say is stereotypically boy or girl.

Dd is demanding of my attention in an emotional clingy way. Ds is higher energy physically and will not be thwarted in his 'projects'. Both tantrumy and not easy to distract or re-direct.

Sighhhh.

[bb99]

Hijack - if boys and girls do (may) have slightly different personality traits (in general) are boys being restricted in their development by being labeled as 'naughty' when they want to race around and be really physical? I know ADHD does exist, but are a more than necessary number of boys being identified as having some kind of behaviour disorder (or being seen as naughty) just because they're being boy like. And I'm not having a pop at anyone who has a child with any kind of issues in this area, or the children - I know behaviour disorders aren't a myth and I am in awe of the parents.

Just a thought - sometimes I see boys at the mummy groups coming under fire and being (well and thought out) disciplined just cos they're racing around and doing what IMO is boyish (and it CAN be girlish too - I was a tomboy and climbed trees and ate worms and all...)

Just seems that there are fewer and fewer opportunities for 'boys to be boys' and my ds is much more physical than dd ever was...

What do you think?

hijack over

[moljam]

i have girl and 2 boys.all completly different.dd and ds2 are very alike in behaviour but ds2 also does things like ds1.

[tatt]

I think people should be allowed to choose the sex of the third and later children but not the first two unless there are strong medical reasons.

Personality is partly how they are brought up and whether the parents impose gender stereotypes. Children are heavily influenced by their friends as they get older.

Both can be demanding in different ways and at different times. I've found girls (friends as well as my own) easier than boys when small, boys easier than girls when pre-teen/ early teens and boys harder when they discover drink. (Where I live there is still a stronger drink culture for males than females.)

[Psychomum5]

well.....I have 3 girls and 2 boys, in that order.

IMO, there is a huge difference between boys and girls..........AND......there is a HUGE difference between girls and girls, and boys and boys!!!

mine are all different, and each of them have the ability to drive me nuts, but I would be lying if I didn;t (at times) prefer one sex over the other. For me, I have found girls easier SO FAR....of course, my girls are now entering their teens, and hormones are raising their ugly heads, so they are getting increasingly harder to handle.

girls were certainly easier as babies, altho my boys weren't hard, they were just different. I had had my girls first too, so maybe that was part of the reason.......I was used to the girls, so boys were more of a shock.

boys are far more active, and need far more physical time....and are also very loud, but then the girls are loud too.

girls whinge more!!!!

girls are nasty to each other........boys argue, thump, maybe kick, and then get on with whatever they were playing again (on the whole).......girls fall out, say nasty words, cry, pinch and scratch, and then harp back to whatever the last arguement was.....and the one before that and the one before that!!!......they bear grudges.

I would still tho, opt for another girl than more boys, and that doesn't in any way mean I don;t love my boys....I do.....I would die for them.....but for me, so far, my girls have been an easier ride.

I did declare when I was pregnant with DS2, that I would love another girl again please, as I had wanted the 'boy thing', had found the 'boy thing ' hard, would now like to bury the 'boy thing', and get girlie again..........got a boy, and feel in love again and I now have the two, they each have each other (so needed), and I wouldn;t change it!

I would never ever choose tho.........babies are a gift and you get whatever you are destined for. be it a SN child, NT child, girl, boy........all are wonderful, all a miracle, all a gift, and all much loved.

[chocolateteapot]

I don't think people should be allowed to choose. Personally I have found my DS a complete doddle compared to my DD but he is my second child so I had half a clue what I was doing with him.

[phlossie]

Ok - I think I agree that it's more down to personalities than gender... but what about the tractors vs cars thing? My boy LOVES any kind of vehicle - tractors, diggers, minis, motorbikes being favourites. He loves his toy kitchen and pushchair, but he refuses to put a doll in his pushchair, but will push along his toy mini. Maybe it's something we've done subconciously? Also, dd seems more interested in people and faces than ds ever was - she definitely smiled earlier.

[Fillyjonk]

I do actually think that kids/babies being "easy" is a over-rated

all the "difficult" babies I know have grown up to be lovely, engaged, and very bright toddlers.

[belgo]

I have two girls and I've had a couple of patronising comments about 'you don't know what it's like to have a boy', implying that boys are more work. Ironic really! They really don't know my dd1!

[blueshoes]

yeah, filly.

Difficult babies = great toddlers and beyond. Still hard work though (harder than easy toddler), but comparatively easier than as baby. Sociable, lively and PITA, all rolled into one. Never fading into the background, teachers and carers always notice dd and ds in a happy if slightly exasperated way. They give as much as they take, if not more.

[Fillyjonk]

lol, at kids being noticable in a slightly exasperated way...ohhhh yes...

(am in NO way biased here btw )

although if dd2 continues to be relatively easy, I may change my tune

[bigdonna]

give me girls anyday.