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Original poster

sons speech delay impacting my mental health :(

32 replies

Michelle50 · 27/02/2023 19:42

i am so terribly worried about my DS. 13 months now, no words and very little in the way of babbling.
HV has scheduled a hearing test.
he does make gestures and understand some of what I'm saying. Doesn't really tick any boxes for autism so not concerned about that.
but keep reading dreadful things about babies who have delayed speech who then go on to have trouble in reading, spelling, self esteem and so on which I find so upsetting. I can't stop thinking about it and it's really getting me down :(
has anyone else had this? will he be ok?

OP posts:
Moonicorn · 27/02/2023 19:49

Quite a few kids don’t have words by 13 months. I wouldn’t worry yet.

PritiPatelsMaker · 27/02/2023 19:52

I would try not to worry too much. dS's friend didn't talk much until he was around 18 months, then went into gave SLT because the other Children couldn't understand him in Preschool.

I think you'd struggle to find a happier and more confident lad now.

It sounds as though you are doing the right thing in arranging the hearing test. If he does gave glue ear, you can join the NDCS for free Flowers

MattieandmummyandIs · 27/02/2023 21:01

Yes, my first child - no words and no babbling until she came out with her first word at 22 months. She has not stopped talking since and at four is very articulate. don't give up just yet x

Miriam101 · 27/02/2023 21:25

I don't think many babies have words at 13 months?! Neither of mine did. Started to come at about 17 months and then thick and fast at 2. Can't shut 'em up now. Please try not to worry about this.

User4891 · 27/02/2023 22:21

Mine barely said a thing at 13MO and hardly babbled at all. She wasn't interested in saying a lot til about 22MO when she just started talking sentences. She had to have a small amount of speech therapy at 3.5 for clarity of speech. She's in reception now and reading phenomenally well. She picks up new phonics digraphs and sight words very quickly and already reads very fluently. Teacher basically said she's leaps and bounds ahead. If she understands you and is using social communication then she's right where she needs to be and the speech will follow. Just keep talking and playing with her and read lots of books and it'll pay off in the end x

Original poster
Michelle50 · 28/02/2023 07:44

wow thank you everyone. its things I'm reading online / HV surveys that are making me worry so much. APPARENTLY people who say 'they all develop at their own rate' are wrong, last night I read something that said when it comes to speech this isn't true, certain milestones must be met at certain ages and so on. it made me feel so crap! i should stop googling. hearing real life examples that have worked out are great for my nerves!

OP posts:
SabrinaGS · 28/02/2023 15:18

The child really needs to reach the milestones in the established age, around 12 months the baby starts to say the first words, but they are simple, like one syllable or mama or dada, sometimes it's just a matter of stimulation, reading with the child, singing, talking a lot and not offering screens before the age of 2 helps a lot.

Original poster
Michelle50 · 28/02/2023 15:42

thank you. i do read sing chat and play with him all the time. from what I can see he gets a lot more attention than some children I know who babble constantly, which i must admit I find a little frustrating :(

OP posts:
MattieandmummyandIs · 28/02/2023 21:08

@Michelle50 if it makes you feel better, I talked to mine alllllllll day long, read about 4 books a day, no TV/screens until 4 years old. Little monster still didn't say a word.

MattieandmummyandIs · 28/02/2023 21:09

My second one gets a lot less attention than number did, at 7 months already says quite a few words! 🤷

Emerald237 · 02/03/2023 13:21

This reply has been withdrawn

This message has been withdrawn at the poster's request

RiverRock22 · 02/03/2023 13:30

I have started a speech and communication support thread over on SN children that might be useful for some contributors to this thread.

artemru · 14/03/2023 00:45

13 MONTH???!!!!!

my son almost didnt react to his name till 2.5
started talking at 3

understanding was there but not always cause he was abit lazy to do tasks and stuff
started talking with using only half of the word or just first letter of the word
ive been worry sick even went to depressive state of mind when start searching for answers in internet (all those stupid red flags,milestones and other bs)

skip to nowadays
hes english way better then mine
He is 4 year old going to school next year
thats all

Laureatus · 27/03/2023 01:06

Please don't worry. Our son started well but became 6m delayed to the extent we got a private speech analysis at 2.5yrs. Everything has played out as the speech therapist said and when he started preschool a month before his 3rd birthday, the keyworkers couldn't believe he'd had any problems. His speech is actually a lot clearer than some of my friends' children who were speaking waaaaay earlier. Keep the faith! Sounds like you're doing all the right things, but always speak to you HV and do an ages and stages questionnaire if you have concerns.

Original poster
Michelle50 · 27/03/2023 08:35

since being on here more and reading more about speech problems i do realise 13 months was very young to be so concerned so i apologise to those who have kids much older with issues, i am sorry if I have offended anyone
just to be clear...if he was babbling like other babies i would not be concerned. it is the absence of any ba-ba-ba ga-ga-ga that has concerned me, ever since his 6 months check where this was one of the criteria.
not expecting proper words at this stage but it's because all I've really heard so far is 'ooh ahh', he is now almost 15months
really appreciate all your responses and words of encouragement thank you all ever so much. i am hopeful that the babbling and words will come soon :)

OP posts:
Ezhildeepa · 17/05/2023 08:30

Hi how is he doing now? Did he start to talk? I am same boat less bable. Oly papa or mama.. No intention in coveying through babble.. Please help with your input.. So worried here

LD1994 · 06/02/2024 18:00

Hi my little girl isn’t babbling now can I ask how your sons doing x

Itisverycomplicated · 07/02/2024 19:25

My DC4 had a speech disorder. His SLT said it was their most confusing case, started talking at 3 and it’s completely resolved. Now he is ahead of his peers reading at school despite being summer born. He comes out with the most elaborate sentences when writing. It’s so weird 2 years ago he couldn’t speak at all. My DS who is 19 months doesn’t have any clear words yet but is very very communicative and social. I have no concerns. Try not to worry, I was so worried with my first and I wish I knew then he would be ok. Even if there is an issue I don’t think you would be starting SLT until gone 2. So much growing to do between now and then.

Mumof3bb1 · 21/09/2024 07:12

@Michelle50 hi how did your little one come on?

Original poster
Michelle50 · 21/09/2024 08:47

hi, well he started talking not long after these messages and now talks like a budgie... 2.5 years old now and has more words than most kids his age I'd say & speaking so clearly people even comment on how much of a great talker he is/how clever he is. i feel so silly for being so worried...all for nothing..it was just those HV checklists that sparked it all. every child is different & on their own journey. hope anyone in the same position finds this reassuring

OP posts:
Mumof3bb1 · 21/09/2024 09:00

Hi @Michelle50 thank you for replying, that is fab news, my ds turned 1 on the 13th and he’s still not pointing, clapping or waving we’ve got some babbles, and understanding in the sense of if I say where’s your ball, car, bubbles etc he’ll look in there direction but won’t point to them.

The worry of not knowing is really playing with my mental health.

Original poster
Michelle50 · 21/09/2024 09:09

@Mumof3bb1 poor you I have been there but it honestly seems like a distant memory now..what everyone said to me was if you can tell they understand what you are saying that's a huge green flag & it turned out to be true.. like i said before they are all different and develop at different rates, try not to worry. hope you get some progress soon xx

OP posts:
Mumof3bb1 · 21/09/2024 09:17

Hi@Michelle50 yeah I feel he understands some stuff I say to him, it’s the lack of gesturing apart from putting his arms up for me to pick him up and occasional high 5.

I go back to work in a few weeks and it’s really stressing me out, I just want to see some progress, when would you say you saw the most progress, and what did you do to help? I feel like I’m reading 10 books and doing all these flash cards everyday but nothing.

Original poster
Michelle50 · 21/09/2024 10:37

@Mumof3bb1 i don't honestly think it was anything I did it just kind of happened naturally which I know isn't helpful, obviously I was just always consistent with talking singing reading and then it all ended up falling into place..you will be doing all the right things so try not to get yourself too worked up and remember boys tend to be a bit lazier with this stuff. things can change so much in a short space of time. this post says I was still worried at 13 months, i guess it wasn't long after this progress started but can't remember exactly. is he going to nursery or child minder when you are back to work? being around other children might bring him on.

OP posts:
Mumof3bb1 · 21/09/2024 11:44

@Michelle50 yeah I’m very consistent with reading and singing etc, all his toys go straight into his mouth or thrown on the floor he can’t stack blocks or a stack ringer toy, so that always worries me. So he’ll be with my husband 2 days and then my mum for one.

hes still not walking so hopefully once he’s off the language and gestures hopefully just explode.