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Original poster

Seven-month-old still not sleeping through the night

126 replies

Lookydo · 27/12/2007 11:57

My ds is nearly seven months old and is still not sleeping through the night. Any advice/tips as to what we can try to get him to sleep through? Don't think we can face Controlled Crying, but we're considering getting dh to try a bottle of water in the night - the theory being it won't be worth ds waking up for. At the moment he wakes up and wants to breastfeed 3 or 4 times a night. Sometimes I hear him wake and he DOES go back to sleep, so it's not as though he can't put himself back to sleep. In the day he's taking solids well - 3 meals a day - and has 2 formula feeds aswell. He goes down really well at 7.30pm and I don't feed him to sleep or anything. In fact, I feel rather cheated because I feel like I've followed all the advice and made sure we haven't created any bad sleep habits - ie. feeding to sleep, rocking to sleep etc. So why isn't he sleeping through? Any advice/your experiences gratefully received.

NB He sleeps in a cot in his own room (only moved him out of our room 6 weeks ago). He is teething at the moment, but as he's never slept through the night I don't know how much longer I can keep making excuses for why he's waking up.

I know some mumsnetters think you should just live with a situation like this, but I really want to change it if I can. I just keep imagining what it'll be like in a year's time when I still haven't slept properly and I'll look back to this period and wished I'd bloody done something! I feel SOOO knackered all the time. And surely I shouldn't still be a walking zombie by now. Also, my health visitor said that if you don't get the sleeping through cracked before the 8 month stage, the waking habit can become very ingrained.

Help!

OP posts:
juuule · 27/12/2007 22:26

Well I for one, envied women who's babies would sleep through from an early age. I love my sleep.

mumfor1standfinaltime · 27/12/2007 22:28

I may have one child but I do know the difference between controlled crying and tired crying.
I was there to listen to the cries.
A tired cry in our house was called a 'jimmy saville' er er er .
Maybe ds didn't need as much help to get himself to sleep as some babies.

cheapslutonjunk · 27/12/2007 22:30

I don't envy the time it takes for these women to get their babies to sleep through using leaving them to cry methods.

I think had I only had one child, I'd be smug about a whole range of things I know are luck now too.

mumfor1standfinaltime · 27/12/2007 22:33

Ha Ha!! How predictable

OverMyDeadBody · 27/12/2007 22:34

at this thread!

Just to put things into perspective, my DS is nearly five now and rarely sleeps through the night, he never has, he's up at least once a night for a loo trip or drink of water!

(doesn't wake me though so obviously I still get my much loved sleep!)

Bluenosesaint · 27/12/2007 22:35

My 5.5 months old doesn't sleep through - she can still wake for up to 4/5 times a night!

My dd1 slept through at 6 weeks and my dd2 slept through at 3 weeks. Twas nothing fantastic that i did ...they were just 'good' sleepers.

I had the same 'routine' for them as i do for dd3 (bath, feed, wind down, sleep ...) the order stays the same but the time changes to meet the needs of the family. I simply have to accept that dd1 and dd2 were good sleepers and dd2 isn't (yet! I'm still clinging to the hope that things may change, lol)

I do most definitly have sleep envy though and would LOVE a full nights sleep!!

OverMyDeadBody · 27/12/2007 22:37

ah yes, sleep envy! I have that too, although for me it's not babies that stop me getting enough sleep, it's too much work

Mellieandmin · 27/12/2007 22:37

I agree, tired cry versus hysterical cry are two utterly different things. I did cc, did the whole 2 mins, 3 mins, 4 mins thing but was sitting on the stairs outside sobbing myself. A baby that wails then waits and listens then wails again then waits and listens is not the same as a really upset distressed baby.

I did not leave my tiny baby to cry, I sat outside her room and cried along. Who could know 60 seconds could last so long? I was never more than 6 feet from her and never, ever let her go from a temper cry to an upset cry.

cheapslutonjunk · 27/12/2007 22:37

Predictable? Maybe. True though

mumfor1standfinaltime · 27/12/2007 22:38

Maybe we should start another thread 'what time does your little one wake' then we can envy those parents who have the longer lay in!

OverMyDeadBody · 27/12/2007 22:41

well DS wakes at 7 on weakdays when I am up at 6, and wakes at 5:30-6 at the weekend when I have a chance to have a lie-in!

It's not fair!!!!

mumfor1standfinaltime · 27/12/2007 22:44

Days that I work and have to be up at 5am then ds will lay in until 7 and on my days off he will wake at 6 so not much of a lay in for me! Nothing to be envious of there!

cheapslutonjunk · 27/12/2007 22:45

Mine woke up at 8am on Christmas Day

mumfor1standfinaltime · 27/12/2007 22:47

Wow! 8am. That truly is a lay in! Ds woke at 6am on christmas day but he climbed into our bed and layed with us for a while. Then I woke just before 8am to find his room covered in pieces of jigsaw puzzles and duplo!

blueshoes · 27/12/2007 22:50

mellie, you wrote: "I did not leave my tiny baby to cry, I sat outside her room and cried along. Who could know 60 seconds could last so long? I was never more than 6 feet from her and never, ever let her go from a temper cry to an upset cry."

You were able to prevent a temper cry from escalating to an upset cry. This is the bit I don't get. For one, my dcs don't have a temper cry v. a distressed cry. Certainly, they never wailed and waited . My dcs did not wait for anything. Put them on their back in a cot and they would be instantly hysterical, certainly within 30 seconds. Even if, or shall I say, especially if, they could see me standing there because they cannot understand why mummy is not picking them up despite their protests. And once they got to that state, even me coming in to soothe them would not work. And they would be so AWAKE by then, the only way they would fall asleep is by crying themselves for hours, then waking 15 mins later to cry some more.

Some of us don't do CC, not because we wear halos, but because it is not a proud thing to do to certain babies.

Chardonnay1966 · 27/12/2007 22:53

I think everyone needs an early night. I'm off to bed. God bless.

Original poster
Lookydo · 27/12/2007 23:06

Wow! That really did get you all talking, didn't it. Just read through it all - loads of useful stuff (aswell as some surprisingly strong feelings). But I'm gonna reply tomorrow when I'm hopefully feeling slightly more awake. But right now, funnily enough, I'm gonna go get me some sleep! Wishing you all an unbroken night's sleep...
(see - I'm nothing if not eternally optimistic)

OP posts:
imdreamingofawhiteKITTYmas · 27/12/2007 23:09

I think I'll add my experinces FWIW

DD1 slept through 8-8 from about 12 weeks fine and great

DD2 different matter both were BF on demand and coslept. DD2 was a much hungrier baby I think she actually did still need milk in the night at 7-8 months. Solids were just starting to kick in then and I honestly believe she still needed the milk, sorry.

However, by the time she got to 12 months she was eating well enough in the day and was still waking 5-6 times in the night and only a feed would put her back to sleep, yes it is exhausting and distressing. I could never do CC sorry I know some do and great for them but it's not for everyone, tried the Baby Whisperer and it didn't work for us. This is what did. DD2 was BF as normal at 8pm when she woke for her first feed all she got was DP comforting her, no Mummy no milk but she was never left alone to cry. First night she cried for 50 minutes and it was really hard listening to her, second night about 10 minutes and third night she went straight through. I believe the milk was a habit and it needed to be broken. We stopped cosleeping at the same time which I was sad about but none of us were getting a good sleep as she was punching and kicking us in her sleep.

I'm pregnant with number 3 and fully expect another year of unbroken sleep I am prepared for it this time and if needs be will do the same thing with this one as DD2 at a year although fingers crossed it will be more like DD1

Hope some of that helps the OP.

CoteDAzur · 28/12/2007 10:22

"I believe the milk was a habit and it needed to be broken."

Exactly. You did this at 12 months. I did it at 4 months. We had two tough nights where DH comforted her and put her back to sleep and she has been sleeping through ever since.

What you did was no different than what I and others here did. Yet you say "I could never do CC sorry I know some do and great for them but it's not for everyone", why is that?

Mellieandmin · 28/12/2007 10:23

Blueshoes - we have different babies. I am not saying DO CC IT IS THE END TO ALL ISSUES, far from it, I just said it worked for me. I did point out in my posts that I know it does not work for all Mums or all babies. Simple fact of life it that we are all different.

I do happen to have a baby with a temper cry, no tears, nothing really wrong apart from the fact she is not getting her own way. It only took 3 days to get the routine in place and now we have no crying at all. She is 8 months and has slept 7/7 since 14 weeks.

Like I said way back in this thread, I am lucky to have a good sleeper. I have stuff with dd that makes me want to sob and pull my hair out, as I said earlier, she eats about enough to keep a sparrow alive and believe me that makes me feel like a total failure. I have 2 step-dds of teenage years who live with us lots that make me want to scream 24/7 but if I take a deep breathe I cam count my blessings for my little sleeper.

missorinoco · 28/12/2007 10:35

how did it go lookydo?

FlllightAttendant · 28/12/2007 10:39

Haven't read anything except OP, but I have to say that I was surprised that anyone would think it odd that a 7 month old wasn't sleeping through!!!

I have one the same age. He sleeps well, but is next to me all night so I lose track of when he feeds etc. My elder son was even less predictable!

Do babies this age really sleep all night?

TrinityTheRedNosedRhino · 28/12/2007 10:43

my mates baby has been sleeping through since 3 months

I was as anything but now at 11 months she is waking in the night 2 or 3 times and I have sat and chuckled at her

imdreamingofawhiteKITTYmas · 28/12/2007 10:58

Cote -I don't believe what I did was CC, CC I believe is where you leave the baby completely to cry for increasing intervals. If you did the same thing as me then pour babies were never left alone to cry.

I am trying to say this as diplomatically as possible without offending but I wouldn't have left DD2 without milk all night at 4 months old. 4 or even 7 months is different to over a year. DD2 was on 3 good meals then plus snacks plus water and a bit of juice. At 4 months I believe she still needed feeding at night (OK maybe not as much as she did but she still needed one or two feeds) but every baby is different I have two very different ones, DD1 obviously didn't need milk in the night as she didn't wake for it, DD2 did.

I don't see why theres loads of animosity on this thread, if you want to do CC then fine do it, if it works for you great, if you don't find some way you are happy with or if you are happy with getting up in the night until your baby sleeps through itself then fine. I honestly couldn't care less when other peoples babies sleep through as it has no bearing on me if you see what I mean.

The OP was asking for advice and I told her my experience thinking it may help.

crayon · 28/12/2007 11:07

We did it without controlled crying at 8 and then 9 months. At 8 months we taught him to self settle, and at 9 months, to have water (or nothing) instead of a feed.

We did a mixture of cuddling, patting and shhh-ing in the cot, gradual withdrawl from the room, but were really led by him (i.e. sometimes picking him seemed to annoy him).

Good luck