I cant take getting up in the night any more! PLEASEHELP!!!

[steph101]

I have a well behaved happy little girl who is 16 months and during the day she is happy as can be. She has a nap which lasts between 1 or 2 hours and she goes to bed promtly at 8 and is fine until.... hmmm around 1 and then 3 and the 5.30 etc. There is no particular pattern to these hours but she does wake up around 3 times. All she wants when she wakes up is a milk bottle - not water or juice just her milk. It is becoming a real problem as i am shattered ( i work 8-12 hour days) and the other half thinks we should just leave her to scream. its not that i havent got the will power to leave her i just always worry that she is ill or has trapped a leg in the bars of the cot etc. Please can any one help me with ideas of how i can get her to sleep thru the night??? Also could some one please explain the code system you all use like DH AND DS1 etc. Thank you !!!

PS any time I am about to start again with a new routine/plan (make sure you keep consistent for at least 2 weeks- i think i usually see results of a new habit after about 3 days though), I have a few nights of co-sleeping to actually get some sleep first!

Steph, I'm in a similar situation myself and you have my sympathy. I would add that whatever you try, it isn't going to work instantly. You really have to work at it for a few weeks to get the results. My advice is for you or your DH to go in and comfort her with a cuddle, and no milk. She won't be happy at first, but eventually she'll get the idea that the milk isn't available at night. Elizabeth Pantley's book The No-Cry Sleep Solution has some good tips. Good luck.

I tend to agree with cotedazur. It sounds like she could be waking up cold. If she is in a cot I would use a grobag for sleeping so she doesn't get cold. Also its much more difficult for them to bounce around in and I found they tend to go back down to sleep quicker of their own accord. If she is in a bed I would recommend the fleecy sleep suits over pj's, this worked a treat for dd who has just gone into a bed. It definately sounds like habit rather than need for food.

Stick to the plan, give cuddle( but not get her out of cot or bed, stroke her head to soothe instead of picking up.) Reassure by saying its time to sleep, night night etc. I would leave it 10 mins before going in again after each reassurance if she cries. Always put her to bed awake so she knows that you have left the room, sometimes children who fall asleep on parents panic during the night because they aren't there.

A friend of mine had exactly this problem but her son is 11mths. She did the training last week and he has slept through the night from day 3!

What helped me was giving my kids a piece of clothing I had worn during the daytime to snuggle up to in the cot. The familiar (and comforting) smell was enough to lull them back to sleep before they surfaced enough to think about milk. I got this suggestion from our Guyanese housekeeper who said that it is the usual thing to do there for young children who sleep alone.

My 5 year old still sometimes asks for my shirt at bedtime though he is old enough now to be rather protective/possessive and tells me that I must put on another shirt to replace it

Might be worth a try?

Oh that's nice BarbadosMama - might give that a try!

Sometimes you may also find that there is some cumulative overtiredness going on. If DC spends a night or two awake for an hour or so, they get overtired and then wake more and for longer. Try several early nights - it's the only thing that works with my ds!!

my lo who is 16 weeks old just woke up 4 times last night - so i can empathise

whereas everyone else seems to sleep through

so thinking of you

hugs

See my advice here. I know all about non sleeping 16 month old dd's.....could write books on them www.mumsnet.com/Talk/67/420232?stamp=071110180512

HaHaaa I'm not alone! my 18 month daughter has just had the same battle with me! I dress her in vest pjs and knitted cardi, with light duvet over the top of her. she has a peice of toast at 6 and goes to bed at 6.45 with 9oz of milk. she used to wake three times as well and screamed till I gave her milk again, but I got so fed up with it I started offering her only water in her bottle. She was mortified at first and furious but after two difficult nights she totally accepted it and now my bags are starting to fade! Its Bliss!

if your dd has a bottle of milk before her nap and before bed then I think it is a sleep association. She "needs" a bottle of milk to relax herself into sleep. If that is a case I'm afraid you will need to ditch the bottle before her nap and before bad to change the habit, try a sippy cup or giving up milk at these times altogether - don't think it will be a pleasant experience though.

Hi guys - thanks for all your help and advice. dd is now in a 2.5tog grow bag (bloody expensive things) and i have been firm and not given her milk at night and I am having up and down nights - just when i thought I had nearly cracked it ( she only woke up once on Sunday night) she was up 4 times (aarrgghh) again last night. I think however, this is a result of her going in to a growbag again for the first time in a long time. dd did not like it much and objected to the fact she couldnt stand up. Still - she was given no milk just juice. Should I be giving her juice or just water? Will keep going thou!!

Thanks for all your help

Steph
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I would say no juice. Why would you want to give juice to a kid at 2 AM? And then at 5 AM?

Aside from the obvious 'no feeding at night' principle that is essential to teaching babies to sleep through the night, there is also the sugar in the juice that will give her energy just when you don't want her to be energetic.

Personally, I would not propose any drinks when she wakes up. Just a hug, saying "It is now time for sleep, not for the bottle" or some such, and down she goes back to bed. The point is that she should realize it is not worth it to wake you up.

Good luck, and persevere! No turning back

Thank you x