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Original poster

i heard a dad describe his dd as "not the birghtest button"

64 replies

FluffyMummy123 · 10/09/2007 12:51

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OP posts:
welshmum · 10/09/2007 12:53

I've heard it a few times, sometimes couched as 'not very academic'.
Seems sad to me, mine are obviously the cleverest children in the whole world and I'll fight anyone who suggests otherwise.

MamaG · 10/09/2007 12:54

DH's mate once described his DD as "like me, thick as pigshit, good job she's bonny"

Original poster
FluffyMummy123 · 10/09/2007 12:55

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canmummy · 10/09/2007 12:55

I think it's refreshing when people recognise their own children's short-comings instead of theirs having to be the best at everything!

Dinosaur · 10/09/2007 12:56

maybe he knows your views on G&T iCod

Original poster
FluffyMummy123 · 10/09/2007 12:58

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expatinscotland · 10/09/2007 13:00

mine's definitely not the brightest light in the harbour. that's not the have all to end all. what's wrong with recognising that?

she's bonnie, however

expatinscotland · 10/09/2007 13:03

Why is it more acceptable to extoll one quality - intelligence - but not another - beauty?

EscapeFrom · 10/09/2007 13:04

actually

(nose firmly in air, avoiding joyous camaraderie)

I think a lot of damage can be done to a child by insisting they are super clever at everything. Because there will come a point in their life when they realise that they're not, and that realisation may bring a fear of disappointing you, and a feeling of failure and frustration('If I am so clever, why can't I do this?')

IMO it's important to let children know that it's ok not to be the very best in the room at something.

RubyRioja · 10/09/2007 13:05

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Skyler · 10/09/2007 13:05

Refreshingly honest IMO.

StarryStarryNight · 10/09/2007 13:07

Luckily my boy are both extremely bright. And totally gorgeous.

(But if I should be proven wrong a some point, it wont matter much, they are MINE and as long as they are HAPPY )

sandyballs · 10/09/2007 13:07

I'm sure I've used this term for my DD, in an affectionate way of course . Particularly when she comes out with things like "Mummy, if I hadn't got up this morning would I still be in bed?" . She's 6.5.

StarryStarryNight · 10/09/2007 13:08

And it is not that I cant spell, I just have a faulty keyboard. Cos I too am extremely prety and totally figted.

VagusPabo · 10/09/2007 13:08

Agree with EscapeFrom.

I wonder if the current trend of yoofs who believe the world is owed to them on a plate, is due to their parents constantly telling them they're the best kid that ever lived.

I applaud the realism, but I hope she didn't hear him. I also hope you said, "Does she take after you?"

binkleandflip · 10/09/2007 13:11

My dd is very bright - but academic - no.

I suspect she may grow into a very artistic/creative type but dh is having a hard time accepting that she isnt classed as G & T like her friend.

If he gives her a complex he's had it.

Original poster
FluffyMummy123 · 10/09/2007 13:15

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minouminou · 13/09/2007 11:14

here in ivory towers-land, you're no-one if you don't boast (more accurately, bray) loudly about how 'adVAAAARRRRNCED" your kid/s is/are.
Me, being an awkward get, have started coming out with stuff like "I don't think we'll be booking the flights to stockholm JUST yet, will we?" (check - nobel prize) at ds (11 mo) and other such stuff - he's too young to realise, what nobel even means, and anyway, he's a bit of a space cadet, but seems to be doing very well cognitively, so i think he is quite bright - i just love the frisson of horror this kinda stuff gives the Phil and Jim's (THE school to be in) groupies round here.
I'm from the north originally, and kids are regularly referred to as "gawps" etc by parents, and you know what, it's done with affection, an not the slightest hint that the kid is actually thick.
people can get too po-faced and competitive about this issue (not referring to anyone on this thread btw), and a bit of a grounding once in a while wouldn't go amiss.

VladimireIlychUlyanovPan · 13/09/2007 11:51

I have the brightest, most beautiful, most graceful little girl on the planet.
Any dad who doesn't think this of their darling dds needs taking out and given a good kicking. In a theraputic sense, you understand.

newlifenewname · 13/09/2007 11:53

maybe he's a realist or self deprecating by proxy?

peanutbear · 13/09/2007 11:55

Well I am a realist my children arent perfect who is? I probably wouldnt say it in front of them though

newlifenewname · 13/09/2007 11:57

I wouldn'tdo it within earshot -was it within earshotand if so,given she aint so bright, would sheunderstand the phrase anyway?

Piffle · 13/09/2007 11:57

no worse than saying my kids not pretty good job he/she's damned clever

niceglasses · 13/09/2007 11:59

Not within earshot no, but echo what others say. I am sick of parents over-praising kids for bloody wiping their own arse.

I have one friend, and she is a good friend, but blimey talk about over -praise. It makes me feel ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Unfortunatley the eldest of hers as turned out wildly competitive and sulky if he doesn't win at absolutely EVERYTHING.

So, nice to hear someone being realistic.

sorry, ranting.

OrmIrian · 13/09/2007 11:59

I sometimes say that kind of thing about my kids - probably not so that they could hear me though. It's harmless if it's said affectionately and with no malice - and most importantly by me and not by anyone else.

My eldest is a clever lad but not academic (as yet). Can I not acknowledge that?