Speech delay. Autism?

[7raina]

My 3 years old has speech delay she was bright was making effort to speak but then it disappeared around the time when my son was born. And I thought it was sibling rivalry (they have year gap between them)
But fast forward to her 3rd bday no speech. Few words and she only speaks when she wants to.
I've been searching for over a year and I convinced myself she is (God forbid) autistic
She doesn't role play no imagination and started hand flapping.
My husband refuses to listen to me he thinks I over exaggerate things. We both r highly educated and although she hasn't been diagnosed I'm broken I had high dreams for her.
Her speech therapist yesterday said she has some traits of autism
We had private assessment and they told us it was just speech delay
Im so stressed for a year I don't sleep much I worry abr her all the time
Now I'm scared that both my kids r autistic
I don't knw wt to do
I wana cry and scream why
And yes she used to be on mobile/iPad all the time since her first bday I took it away 2 weeks ago and seen improvement
Plz only positive comments story
As I'm verge of nervous breakdown

Thanks ladies xxx

Hi OP, not sure if you want my input, due to your comments to some others, but you may find it useful.

I'm female, 32 and have 'high functioning autism'.

I had delayed Speech, hand flapping, and major emotional issues and much preferred solo play and disliked touch etc.

However I went to 'normal' schools, never needed any additional help and was in top sets for English, math and science, did very well in exams and have managed to hold down jobs and progress, I've also just had my own little boy a few weeks ago.

I was brought up as a NT child, so never really knew I was overly different, my mum was very patient but strict with me to help me overcome some issues and learn how to read emotions etc, but again I am very high functioning. Saying that I do still have some struggles.

Basically try not to worry before you know, autistic people can and do lead full normal lives and do well academically.

If you would like to talk further for advice and My experiences feel free to inbox me.

But please, I know it's hard, but try to stay calm about it all.

Thank you both for your input. I will get a grip and deal with whatever this is. Moomin Kitty, that's a great advice and a lot of people told me 'it's not end of the world, he would just need extra help some things I don't know anyone autistic so for me the possible scenarios are what got me really scared. I shall take it day by day and he is still the same boy, my best boy ever. I will adapt and try to do what your mum did. Congratulations on your little boy, welcome to the world :) How is motherhood treating you?
Thank you ladies xxx

Hi OP,

Sorry you are having such a hard time.

In the nicest possible way, I think it's important you get some support for your own wellbeing /mental health. The road to diagnosis (or non-diagnosis) for kids can be long. It was 13 months for my DS and I've heard of it taking 2 years in some areas. That is a long time to be worried there's something going on with your child. It takes an emotional toll. Do you have much of a support network around you? If not, maybe see if there are any SEN parent/child groups in your area? We made some really great friends at some of these and going through the assessment process with other families was hugely helpful. Having other Mums to talk to totally saved my sanity.

My DS is on spectrum was pretty much non-verbal at 3. He's six now and is very chatty. His conversation is not as spontaneous or fluent as other kids his age, but he manages in mainstream school and is a lot of fun

Even if you child does turn out to be ASD, you'll be amazed at the progress some of them make after what appears to be a very slow start.

My little boy sounds pretty similar, he had no speech until last month (hes 27 months), he began saying single words like car and painting and now he can speak I 3-4 word sentences, so sometimes it can just come on overnight.
Echoing the sentiment of other posters i think you need to see a counsellor for.your own peace of mind. Autism is a spectrum disorder and far more people fall in the mild to moderate middle than extreme end, although as a parent who previously had similar worries I understand why your brain thinks worst case scenario.
If your daughter IS autistic it wont change who she is at her core, she'll still be the little girl you love and it doesn't mean her life is over. The most intelligent man have ever met is moderately autistic, he has a PhD and has a 6 figure salary, he just struggles in groups of more than 3/4 and needs things done in a set order.

Please do some reading around autism. You'll be pleasantly surprised.

Did your son babble at all prior to learning to speak? My son is nearly 2 and doesn’t babble and says no words at all 😞 very limited understanding also.

@kellbelle92

He did, but he was a late babble too x

@Feltywelty when did his understanding of language come along ? I think some days if only he could understand what I was saying he would pick up speech x

@kellebelle92
Oh lord I'm not too sure. He could point things out in books when I asked around 14 months? He followed simple commands around the same time. It is one of his strengths. BUT he never copied me vocally until last month.
Does your LO point to show you and ask for help/shake head for no ect?

kellbelle92 my son did babble but didn't do anything like point. His understanding of spoken language was also extremely poor at 2/3. But at 6 he's much more verbal.

@Feltywelty , no he doesn’t try and get my help for anything 😞 he doesn’t shake his head and doesn’t point things out. He will point at things that intrest him though. He understands very very few commands it’s almost like I’m talking a foreign language to him I’m almost certain he’s autistic x

@BatleyTownswomensGuild that’s what really concerns me, the lack of babbling and the fact he doesn’t point to show me things x

@kellebelle92 my son was equally delayed in speech and language, he pointed at 2.5 and had his first very unclear words around 3. Now at 4.5 I can say that i understand 99% of what he say's - however I think his understanding is behind that - we all focused so hard on his speech... if i ask him what he had for lunch at school he tells me what he had for snack, if his teacher asks him what he did at the weekend he tells her what he did that morning before school.

Saying that, I would be very surprised if he has a MLD, he's average+ for reading/writing/numbers/self care. Autism was ruled out by MDA.

@AladdinMum - just interested in your opinion.

@kellebelle92 - my ds had no concept of understanding language before 2 btw, he couldn't even point to tell me where it hurt. He did hand lead though and he did copy/imitate in other ways - e.g copy dance moves.

Just wondering if anyone has any update on there DC that had limited understanding/ speech by 2? @kellbelle92?

@Mummy0ftwo12 thank you xx

We started Nemechek Protocol 2 months ago. After 2 weeks my son started to point properly and I've realised that his pointing was never the 'proper'pointing before, he pishes us to get what he wants and tries to communicate, now he babbles makes new noises every day and makes up games that involve me and his daddy. He wants us to play with him all the time now. I reccomend reading up about it and see if you want to try it, it only uses natural ingredients and the book available on Amazon explains the science. Have healthy Easter everyone ! xxx

Hi everyone - Just wondering if @kellbelle92 @deluca97 you were able to get any further with their speech/understanding? Or finding any diagnosis? My lo is the same with no gestures and language at 19 months and in really worried - any advice or help would be very much appreciated - thank you!

r1911 Noah was diagnosed with ASD last autumn,( despite all the tremendous progress he has done ) he still has some social issues but he is speaking now (a chatterbox!) and learning 3 languages simultaneously, he is gradually learning to play with more and more kids and life got million times easier, no self harming for very long time now and he understands everything, has some developmental delay which i believe just need time to catch up. N still needs support but he is progressing every day and most of people that meet him say 'he is just a 'normal' kid not autistic and doesn't stand out', most people can't pick up on the subtle signs but hearing things like that from general public is reassuring. We've been on Nemechek protocol religiously for over 2 years and i can say that it made the biggest difference, together with taking on any possible support and therapies as soon as possible is the best decision that we made. It takes time and we had plenty ups and downs but seeing the progress make my mum's heart much much much lighter. I wish i heard about NP earlier.. all the specialists involved including the paediatritian are blown away and didn't expect him to make so much progress, at some point paediatritian went from 'I think it is autism' to 'not sure anymore, let's go ahead with assement, can't hurt'. Good luck :*

@deluca97 hi, could you possibly message me some information on nemcheck protocol? I have tried and tried to understand it but I think I just need a bit of guidance from someone who has successfully done it. My son is 4 now. No words. Communicates by hand leading and picture cards but he is so very frustrated. I am willing to try anything at this point x

Hi kellbelle92 sure, message me, also there are invaluabe groups on facebook with hundreds of parent willing to help, everyone's experience is slightly different adnd everyone is patient and willing to help, there are files that help understand the concept, very supportive, saved my mental health over the last 2,5 years names of the groups are:
Nemechek parents, UK

(This one is private so you your FB freiends won't see you're in it)
The Nemechek Protocol International Support Group
(this one is public, worth joining anyway as there is thousands of parents on it, just be wary in case you don't want your fb friends to be in your business, you can also post anonymusly)

Thank you so much @deluca97 for your response and its great to hear that he is doing so well 💗

@kellbelle92 did your little one get diagnosed with anything or are you still in the process?
I contacted the health visitor team today and was able to get some advice and will be speaking to gp soon. I might also look in to the protocol.

@r1911 yes he has been diagnosed with autism and sensory difficulties. This was finalized in November.

@kellbelle92 how is he doing?

@thupre @7raina @Peacingout123 @BatleyTownswomensGuild would really appreciate any updates - hope youre all doing well

Hi! My guy is 4.5 and we recieved a GDD diagnosis at age 2.5 and an ASD diagnosis at age 3.5. That being said he has come such a long way! He is a chatter box at this point. His expressive language is definetely more advanced than his receptive language still. He just started asking basic questions like what is that, what are you doing, what's your name? He also just started being able to answer some basic questions and follow simple directions like go clean up but I don't know howuch of that is because his receptive language was behind or his willingness to do it or because of his motor planning issues. He really talks sooo much no for example he literally just walked up to a kid at the park today and said "you have a really neat shark on your shirt!" And then observed and told me "none of the kids have their jackets on! It's spring!". This coming from a boy whose speech therapist told me just after he started talking at two that she was confident he would never speak and the fact he started surprised her.

That said he can't draw or print, only scribbles, can't recognize any letters, shapes or numbers despite me trying hard with him. We have a ways to go and likely always will, but he has made so much progress.