Speech delay. Autism?

[7raina]

My 3 years old has speech delay she was bright was making effort to speak but then it disappeared around the time when my son was born. And I thought it was sibling rivalry (they have year gap between them)
But fast forward to her 3rd bday no speech. Few words and she only speaks when she wants to.
I've been searching for over a year and I convinced myself she is (God forbid) autistic
She doesn't role play no imagination and started hand flapping.
My husband refuses to listen to me he thinks I over exaggerate things. We both r highly educated and although she hasn't been diagnosed I'm broken I had high dreams for her.
Her speech therapist yesterday said she has some traits of autism
We had private assessment and they told us it was just speech delay
Im so stressed for a year I don't sleep much I worry abr her all the time
Now I'm scared that both my kids r autistic
I don't knw wt to do
I wana cry and scream why
And yes she used to be on mobile/iPad all the time since her first bday I took it away 2 weeks ago and seen improvement
Plz only positive comments story
As I'm verge of nervous breakdown

Thanks ladies xxx

No! My son. He still does not understand much at all and I of course google too much. I know I did not want to focus on myself but at a point know that I know its the best thing for my son, partner and myself. Given your comments I would suggest you talk to someone if it is affecting how you view your child or is interfering with anything at all. I went for over a year not adressing it and there is so much valuable time I missed out on and did not enjoy. Me taking care of myself does not in anyw way take focus off my son. In the end my family is so much better off because I got help.

@7raina you're being really unreasonable here. You've asked a question and people are giving their experiences. Some might find your posts insensitive and rude. Answering Aladdin's post in that way is way OTT and totally uncalled for.

I was going to talk about my DS, but given how you've shouted down posters for daring to try and be positive about autism I won't bother.

My DS may not be NT but he has some amazing traits and I'm proud to be his mum. "Losing hope and feeling like dying" because your DC might end up like one of ours is a shit thing to say. Obviously you have concerns but your DD needs you to advocate for her, not treat her like she's faulty.

Speech delay and expressive language delays might trun into intellectual disabilities that's what my neurologist said to me. Speech might come at later stages but by that time, they will be far behind with their peers in understanding the world. So we have to help our kids to understand the things happening around them through expressive language. I know it's not easy as said. Even i was so scared when neurologist pointed abt intellectual disability but it is true that we have to apply different strategies on them to catch up with the world speech is not the only way for communication for them at least at this stage.

@thupre at this age speech counts for only 10-20% of all communication so it's normally fairly straightforward to see if it's concerning. A child which is only speech delayed will have no problem in communicating to meet his needs and to share experiences, they tend to increase their use of gesturing to compensate (ie. there is a clear motivation to communicate and a speech delay will not stop them) - this type of speech delay tends to clear by itself by the time they are three years old.

It becomes concerning when a child is speech delayed and showing no motivation to communicate at a social level (lack of joint attention, lack of pointing to share interests, etc.), this is not typical development as typically developing babies are born "social" and are motivated to interact at a social level, they spend the first 18 months of their life learning and practising social communication (autism distorts and delays social communication). When this does not happen then there is nearly always an underlying issue, whether that is autism or another pervasive disorder is what a development ped will try to assess using a number of tools. Parents tend to link autism to speech as its normally the first sign they clearly see (and can't ignore) indicating that their child might have some developmental delays, but there would have been many many more subtle signs way before then.

@AladdinMum, I second this.

After knowing that out kids have other underlying issue other than speech, how can we support then to over come it, other than talking to them, engaging with the all the time (which I'm already doing up-to some extent)?

Any specific diet to follow to improve their brain development? Based on Summ3ers info, I googled about Nemecheck protocol, which has massive success stories from it, at the same time here and there some negative comments who say's it got worse after using it (about 1% of people I would say). i'm scared to try on that, at the same time feel happy while reading success stories.

Any mum here knows more about Nemecheck protocol and stories about it please share your personal experience. @Summ3ers you said have already started seeing progress which is a good thing! happy for you. Please share more about it.

I have ordered the book and waiting to do my research on it.

In regards to the protocol, the best advice I can give is read the book and everything around it (good and bad stories) and then make an informed decision based on that. I read all I could (pros and cons) and decided it was something I definitely wanted to try. Some parents have reported worse behaviour and other negative effects which was obviously a worry and something to consider. However, from my understanding, many of the issues have resolved as the protocol has been continued, often resulting in amazing gains. My little man has had lots of gut health issues since birth (and I’ve been reading that there is some research linking gut health and speech delays). He is also a withholder and the protocol can initially cause constipation as the body heals (which is how I interpreted the explanation but much more to it than I can explain). However, as so many parents have said that it has really helped their children in the long run, I gave it a go. I think one mistake parents make is to start the protocol without carefully reading the book and understanding the doses etc. We started off slowly with a tiny amount of fish oil (as some children can’t tolerate fish oil). Within a week we saw more babble and words. Then 2 weeks later we added the extra virgin olive oil just into our cooking and a tiny tiny amount of inulin. A day in my son withheld as I expected so we increased his laxatives. 2 days later no issues and he started to pass formed stools for the first time in a year and a half!! Couldn’t believe it as before it had been a real sensory issue for him. In regards to his speech, now 2 months down the line I have seen a big improvement. Much clearer, longer sentences, recalling things he’s done at nursery etc. Could be coincidence but I believe the protocol has definitely helped. I can only report on my personal experience as it may not be right for every parent. There are amazing Facebook pages dedicated to it with people on it who know a lot more than I do. Hope my experience has helped xxx

Hi Summ3ers,

Thank you for the detail description. One last question on this, When it says use Extra virgin olive oil, is the recommended one is California extra virgin olive oil ? (I have seen that in some blogs), The reason why i'm asking this is, I need to order everything from online and it takes a while to reach me. I just want to keep it ready and once I get the book, i can read and undersatnd the suitable dose for my daughter age/health then use the things, instead of ordering the products after finishing the book and again waiting for the products. Though I ask questions about diet, I don't use any until I completely read and undersatnd the book.

I just want to reduce the wait time, if I have things ready so that i can prepare well in advance. & how did you measure so less quantity? do we need any special spoons for that? and fish oil did you get in capsule and did you use it by opening the capsules? I think 'Now' is the recommended brand fro both Inulin and FO.

Sorry for asking too many questions!! as you have already started using it, you might have better idea about products. Book might have all these details, I'm just jumping quickly to keep things ready.

thanks again hun.

No worries at all. The olive oil is tricky as only certain ones are mentioned (that are tricky to source in the Uk) but lots of UK parents use Il Casolare (which has an orange label and can be found in most supermarkets). Not sure if it’s officially approved but it’s the one I use too. I use Nordic naturals fish oil and use a medicine syringe to measure 1ml a day. I hide it in my sons prune juice each morning. Without having the bottle in front of me I can’t remember the strength I use but it’s lemon flavour without the added vitamins. The fish oil is expensive though and has to be kept in the fridge. Lasts 3 months. I use Now inulin and I bought a 1/8 measuring spoon off Amazon quite cheaply. They come as a set. If you can join the UK Facebook page then I think they have the exact fish oil you need on there. Xx

Thanks Summ3ers,

I ordered the supplements today and waiting to receive book and along with the items!. Excited to start this new journey and hoping for the best!!!

Thanks a lot summ3ers, definitely I will come back here to share my experience.

Fantastic! Feel free to private message me at any point. Will be lovely to have someone else to celebrate the progress with. Wishing you all the best. Only yesterday, the nursery called me in to say that they couldn’t believe how well my little man is doing in regards to sharing, making friends and his speech. Xxx

Wow! that's amazing to know, happy for your little boy to see that big difference in shot span of time. This is truly a miracle (as book describes). Thank you so much Summ3ers for your support and sharing!! I will message you for any concerns.

Thanks a heaps!!!

your poor DD. Your post is just about you. you had dreams for her, god forbid she may be autistic. you are at the verge of a nervous breakdown.

I (also highly educated if that helps) have a DD with autism and learning difficulties. Its not what I wanted for her but it really isn't the end of the world and just doom and gloom. I understand your worry and heartache but your posts are absolutely pathetic!

use your highly educated brain and find out ways how to support and help your DD. I can tell you that this won't be forthcoming from the NHs but will have to be done by you and your DH.

I have two DDs with Autism. It really isn't the end of the world. My older DD is studying a highly scientific university degree.

Lots of children with speech delay and ASD do really well academically when they're older.

I know you haven't been diagnosed but, given some of your responses on this thread, it's possible you have ASD too. Would it be the end of the world if your children grow up like you?

If one of both of them has SSD you will still adore them and feel proud of them. You'll still celebrate their achievements. A diagnosis won't change who they are or stop them being who they should be.

It might help you to find a Facebook group or online forum for parents of children with ASD. The support and feedback you get could help you a great deal, whether it's to reassure you or to help you get the right support for your DD.

The biggest challenge for me of having two DDs with ASD has been fighting professionals to get them the educational provision they need. If it weren't for that, my life as their mother would be lovely. ASD isn't all bad.

I have two DDs with Autism. It really isn't the end of the world. My older DD is studying a highly scientific university degree.

are you saying it is not the end of the world because your DD is academically fine?

Lots of children with speech delay and ASD do really well academically when they're older.

and lots have significantly learning difficulties. Your posts reads as if op may be OK in the end - after all there is still hope for a bright child.

I'm sorry.

That wasn't my intention. I was trying to show the OP that having ASD doesn't mean her child is never going to achieve anything. I don't think I worded it too well.

@7raina omg I can totally relate ... my son is 20 months and showing a lot of signs also and I m also at the edge of nervous breakdown 😥 x

I can relate, and just wanted to comment on Aladdin'sMum's point (A child not pointing to share experiences, not showing objects of interests, not initiating imaginative play by 2 years old is very concerning and in most cases would be autism. )

My DS didn't point until 2.4 and was 3.5 before he showed any signs of imaginative play, paediatrician told me it was classic autism, as did two other doctors and two salts, one of which warned me he might never talk - so i can totally relate to the worry. In my DS's case the third SALT quickly decided not autism and was proved to be correct by the ADOS/MDA. I don't know where the evidence is that most kids with a receptive language delay must be autistic but there does seem to be an assumption out there - and as much as I respect what AladdinsMum says - I know that its as worrying as hell if you are that parent who is scared that your child might never talk.

I read a post on here once that imitation is more difficult for children with autism - at two my DS had no concept of language or gestures, if he wanted to go out he would take my hand as a tool and throw it at the door handle (which the internet says is another sign of autism) but... he would try and imitate his sisters actions e.g. dancing.

OP - sorry your going through such a worrying time.

Hi @Mummy0ftwo12, my son sounds just like your son .. with the no speech , no understanding and no gestures. Feelings pretty low and helpless at the moment 😕 My son also flaps his arms quite a bit which is an indication of autism..
How old is your son now ?

@kellbelle92 my dd flapped flapped her arms - not autistic.

How old is your son? and have you seen a speech therapist? you might find the teachmetalk website useful, there is a list on there of pre verbal skills a toddler learns before speech - at 2 my ds was about half way through that last and it took him another year before first words, the list is useful because you can see what stage your son is at and what you can practice with him. E.g if he tries to grab some juice and you are working on understanding words, you could say 'juice, you want juice'

My son is 21 months , it’s not so much the speech that concerns me, it’s the lack of understanding, the lack of gestures. One this he has now learnt is to grab our hand and lead us somewhere which I think is a good start 😊 shows he wants to communicate I suppose ?
I have my first appointment with the speech therapist in December.
Maybe I’m overthinking things , maybe I’m
Not just a very difficult time right now 😕 x

'One this he has now learnt is to grab our hand and lead us somewhere which I think is a good start 😊 shows he wants to communicate I suppose ?' yes :-) my DS did that.

Have a look at Makaton and Mr Tumble, because he might end up getting frustrated if he can't find a way to communicate what he wants before speech comes - and for us speech took a long time.

Thanks @Mummy0ftwo12 😊 , what website was that Again ? I googled it the only one I can find is where you have to pay for the book ?
When did your ds start pointing , speaking ect ?x

teachmetotalk.com/category/parents/
the e-book on that page is free! so are the PDF's, podcasts and videoclips - i bought one of the dvd's but most of it was covered in the clips/podcasts.

DS started to point to show interest at 2.4, just after his second speech therapy sessions, his first words came just before 3

hi all, I have similar worry, long story short some time ago in November we raised alarm for my son as he was showing some signs of autism and not speaking, I had a bit of a breakdown, very stresfull time, in december we went for xmas to poland and decided to visit laryngologist who pulled two big chunks of dry earwax from his ears and said adenoids and tonsils need removing, after that loads of behaviours got much better (horrible meltdowns almost dissapeared), he started to make few new noises although not words but more like A E I O U and communication between us improved a lot, yesterday was time for paediatritian appointment, tbh i stopped worrying about autism and went to the visit because we waited so many months so it would be waste to cancel. The doctor thinks he may have an autism because of following : my son is 2 years 6 months old and says only bye-bye from time to time doesn't call me or anyone else mama , likes to play by himself , doesn't turn to his name as a reflex but more like when he is not busy and bangs his head on the floor when he isn't happy, community pediatrician said she believed it is that, she said he responds to his name on his terms and not as reflex, doesn't really bring thing to 'show us' however during the session he brought to to put on my husband knees and play with it. she said the fact that he doesn't associate work with person even if everyone were to be called 'mama' by him makes her concerned autism may be the diagnosis. Please help and share your thoughts and experiences xx

@deluca97 autism is not a speech disorder and speech delays are very common, so only a lack of speech is normally not concerning. Toddlers at this age have many ways to communicate without using words (for example, social referencing, communicative eye contact, pointing, reaching, praise seeking, etc) and having his ears blocked or having enlarged/sore tonsils should not affect any of this (though it will affect speech but nothing else). However autism tends to distort the above examples of non-verbal social communication which is what your paediatrician seems to be raising concerns about.