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Just been to a workshop at Ds's nursery and am a bit concerned now

85 replies

NuttyMuffins · 14/06/2007 11:35

Ds is 4.6 and starts school in Sept.

When I went to his last nursery meeting, his teacher raised concerns about his lack of pencil control and interest in writing and drawing, but said they would be addressing it at nursery, getting him to do activities using the same position he needs to hold a pencil in etc.

Anyway, I went to the workshop today and various activities were set out around the room. Ds was fine with the activites that were toys to play with, and was also fine on the computer, and with the sand, water play etc, but with the drawing, writing, painting and jigsaws he just could not do it.

He painted me a picture, i asked him what it was and he said an alien, and then he just painted straight lines. I said what about his face, and he said there it is and pointed to one of the lines.

He then had a go on the blackboard. I said i'd draw a letter and he could copy, and he basically couldn't copy any of them at all, not even ones in his name.

Then he moved on to the tracing activity, anxd he had to trace a picture of a policeman. I explained what to do, and he picked up the pencil and just looked at me like he really didn't understand what I meant. I explained again and showed him and he picked up his pencil and scribbled across the whole piece of paper.

Lastly he did a jigsaw and again he just didn't seem to understand that he had to find the right piece and put it in the right place, and even when he got the right peice, he couldn't get it to fit, and this was an incredibly easy jigsaw.

I spoke to his teacher about him, and she said that really he hasn't progressed at all since she last spoke to me about it and that she had been writing his report recently and that in the area of writing, drawing etc he doesn't meet any of his targets for his age and isn't even close to meeting them. He cannot even draw shapes, he can tell you what the shape is, but cannot draw it or even copy it.
She said he is fine with recognising numbers and number work if he hasn't got to actually write the number, but letters he still struggles with, and if they ask him to write any letters he just can't.

I am now really worried that in reception he is going to be so far behind he will never catch up.

OP posts:
morningpaper · 14/06/2007 12:04

mozhe "in many european countries,( and other places too..), he wouldn't be expected to be interested in things like this."

Is that true? I thought that all children played with pens and things

NuttyMuffins · 14/06/2007 12:05

Sport he isn't really into either but will join in if coaxed a bit. He likes to run around but isn't very good at kicking a ball, he can catch and throw though.

He does do chalking on the floor at nursery, and they said he likes doing scribble with it but nothing else. Lego too he is a bit fingers and thumbs with.

Have just got him an opticians appointment for 26th June.

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NuttyMuffins · 14/06/2007 12:05

What does a sight test for a 4 yr old actually involve ?

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PandaG · 14/06/2007 12:06

won't be letter recognition - will be what is this - car butterfly type thing I would think.

foxinsocks · 14/06/2007 12:08

I guess you are worried about dyspraxia (?).

It does sound like his fine motor skills are not quite there yet but don't forget, you've only got your girls to compare him with and they are normally further ahead with those skills (at the same age iyswim) anyway.

I would keep an eye on it - be guided by the school (it sounds like you have confidence in them) and keep encouraging him gently.

I know you wouldn't but whatever you do, don't try and make him write if he doesn't want to because it may put him off for life!

He sounds very capable nutty!

(if he doesn't like playdough and you like baking, kneading dough for bread and biscuits is also v good for their fingers! ANd things like model building with cardboard, paper where they have to cut and tear).

Anna8888 · 14/06/2007 12:11

NuttyMuffins - this doesn't sound right at all.

My daughter (2.7) had an interview with the headmistress of her future (French) maternelle (pre-school) a month or so ago. The main thing the headmistress checked for was fine motor skill development - so drawing, jigsaw puzzles, putting little toys together etc. My daughter can do a 24 piece jigsaw really easily on her own and has been able to do so for a couple of months now.

Can you talk to your HV or GP and see whether you can get an OT or physio referral?

NuttyMuffins · 14/06/2007 12:11

Thanks foxy, not sure what I am worried it might be tbh, just feel really awful that i might have missed something, whatever it is.

Thanks Panda, that will be ok then.

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katelyle · 14/06/2007 12:12

My ds showed very little interest in anything that didn't involve pushing a car, kicking a ball or rushing around like a banshee until about half way through reception. His teacher said she had to be very careful how she asked him to do things "Would you like to come and do some reading now?" always got the response "No thank you"

He is now at the end of year 1, can read quite well, really enjoys writing and doing maths, but he still really doesn't enjoy drawing or painting or anything at all "arty" Getting him to draw a picture for Grandma's birthday was like getting blood out of a stone!

They are all different, and I am constantly amazed at the range of abilities in NT children in his class. Your ds is still barely more than a baby - I wouldn't worry. Any sressure will probably slow him down.

Anna8888 · 14/06/2007 12:13

Mohze - I don't know which country(ies) you are referring to, but you would be expected to be doing this in France. Check out the curriculum on the Ministère de l'Education Nationale site if you aren't sure.

katelyle · 14/06/2007 12:14

Oh and he would find a jigsaw with more than 24 or so peices a challenge even now - that is, if I could get him to sit down long enough to do it! Anna888, I think you'll find that your dd is gifted and talented in the jigsaw department!

NuttyMuffins · 14/06/2007 12:14

Anna - Tbh I do remember Dd1 and 2 both being able to do jigsaws at their development checks and they were alot younger than 4.6, and I just hadn't realised that ds could not do them.

Ds didn't have a 3 yr developmental check though, I don't think they do them here anymore. Will try and ring the health centre and see. Tbh i don't even know who my hv is, oldx one left years ago and new one has never been in contact.

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NuttyMuffins · 14/06/2007 12:16

Thanks kate - he is definatly not as interested in the drawing, writing side of things as his sisters were, so hopefully it is just that and he will improve with time.

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francagoestohollywood · 14/06/2007 12:17

Mohze is right, in other European countries noone would stress the mother of a 4 and a half year old who is not yet ready/interested to write letters. I'm having the worst of times at the moment, ds started reception in January with no interest in it whatsoever. Which didn't worry me at all, as he is brilliant at playing and making up scenarios for his adventures, he likes to be read at, and can concentrate for quite long stretches of time. I'm happy that his nursery has never pushed him too much towards more formal learning. But now I'm being made feel "guilty" for this.

Anna8888 · 14/06/2007 12:18

katelyle - and do you have any careers advice for her please based on your diagnosis?

foxinsocks · 14/06/2007 12:19

lolol at G&T in the jigsaw department

you sound like you are doing all the right things nutty - probably worth a visit to the HV just in case you need her help later on down the line

Anna8888 · 14/06/2007 12:20

Franca - maybe not in Italy. But in France the curriculum in moyenne section (ie year of your fourth birthday) is to learn all your letters

katelyle · 14/06/2007 12:22

Stained glass window maker?
Archaeologist?
Crisis resolution negotiator?

nogoes · 14/06/2007 12:25

Nutty, have a search on EBAY for Montessori sandpaper letters. Montessori nurseries use this approach and it is very successful, I think they normally sell for around a tenner, or you could probably have a go at making them yourself.

Anna8888 · 14/06/2007 12:28

Thanks . Perhaps a visit to Notre Dame should be on today's agenda? And then I'll let her loose in a playground of 9 year olds...

NuttyMuffins · 14/06/2007 12:28

Thanks nogoes, will do that now.

Just been googling various things and it seems to be that from what i have seen and been told that his fine motor skills are delayed. Which is what I thought really.

Right am off to goolge for fun things to help him.

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Anna8888 · 14/06/2007 12:32

Nutty - do try and find a sympathetic HV/GP/physio. They can really help with these things.

francagoestohollywood · 14/06/2007 12:33

Is it compulsory then? I'm pretty sure letters are done in Italian nursery schools as well (but sorry, I won't mention Italy anymore), but don't think a lack of interest in those from a 4 and half year old child would have the teachers too much alarmed. Certainly the lack of fine motor skills can be a cause of alarm, I wasn't very good, and I think it was related to my severe squint.

Anna8888 · 14/06/2007 12:36

99% of children in France go to maternelle at 3, 4 and 5 (and yes, there are moves to make it compulsory), there is a curriculum and lots of groundwork is covered so that children will be reading fluently by Christmas of their first year in primary school.

I know that in Belgium there is less preparation in maternelle than in France, so children don't learn to read so quickly when they start primary school.

Anna8888 · 14/06/2007 12:39

Oh, and Franca - I think it is VERY interesting to discuss differences in education systems between countries and you should mention Italy all you like

Budababe · 14/06/2007 12:40

Hi Nutty - my DS is coming to the end of Yr 1 (he will be 6 in August). While in Reception he had no interest in reading for the first term - then one day just refused to go home without a word sheet. Zero interest in colouring or writing. Pencil control was non-existent. Jigsaws were ok.

At the first meeting with his Yr 1 teacher she suggested the play-doh, writing in sand etc. Also buying a squidgy ball and getting him to squeeze it in his hand to strengthen his muscles.

Now he is catching up. Writing is better but still not great by any means. Is enjoying colouring and actually wanting to do it which in turn is improving the pencil control. Had final meeting of the year with teacher on Tuesday and she said that some boys don't get interested in colouring till around age 9.

Boys do develop their fine motor skill more slowly than girls. (Another teacher recommend Playstation to help that too!).

When will he start Reception? Sept? You have all summer to work on some fun ways for him to improve the fine motor skills. Lots of children start Reception not able to hold a pencil.

The sight test is a good idea. If you can sort out a developmental assessment that may help set your mind at rest.