I followed contented Gina Ford's Contented Little Baby

[puffling]

Am I the only one here who found this book useful? Here's why?
If I hadn't read it, I wouldn't have had a clue when to feed (more relevant as dd was eventually formula fed). I wouldn't have known about naps and night sleep. I had no received knowledge as I don't have much family. I did read other books but they seemed waffly and woolly.
Once I was more confident, I found that dd didn't follow GF to the letter, but it was a foundation for me.
I don't understand why people have a problem with writers who give definitive solutions/advice. If they don't like it, they can simply ignore it.

Yes, I was astounded that my mum couldn't remember the details of my baby routine - how could she NOT?

Tis scary though how quickly it happens. I have forgotten everything already and ds is only four!

OK point taken Desiderata. I always took it rather personally - perhaps I was being unfair. Sorry mum!

God I know desi. When I had ds1 I had no idea how people couldn't remember, by the time I had ds3 I had no idea. I can remember bits of ds1, ds2 & ds3 are blurs.

Yes, it's inevitable.

I've said this before on MN, and I'll say it again

Some more than others. Left alone 2 year old ds3 would be busy cooking spag bol; ds2 (and ds1 obviously) would struggle!

That's a very interesting point, gess.

The differences between siblings has always intrigued me. They have the same parents, the same upringing, the same toys, and yet ... how different they are.

Which is why I still maintain, that Gina Ford ............................................................ ..................

actually I don't think children in the same family do have the same upbringing of the same parents. we all treat our children differently. we change as parents and as a couple as life and parenthood goes on

My three are chalk (ds2) cheese (ds3) and completely insance (ds1).

insane I mean.

Ds3 was born stroppy.

we ARE all individual, but we do all have the same physiological need for food and sleep and, while we don't all need the same amount of these things, we all need a certain amount, certainly children do, for their growth and development.

What GF does for many is put these needs within a framework. For some I guess the framework fits exactly, others do things which poke out the sides a bit but still largely within it.

And as someone else said, if your baby is not falling within the framework at all then you switch to another one, or none!

oh and GF's methods are < > and < > and ime < > to the early parenting experience for some mothers, particularly inexperienced and vulnerable ones and also < > to breastfeeding.
I also once heard a lecture on attachment and the professor said < > and < > about GF and her methods.

Allegedly.

And yet, an inexperienced and vulnerable mother whose baby slots into naps and feeds at her suggested intervals and whose baby is a joy to her as a result, has the best help she could get; assuming that she had no other source of info, as many don't, and a HV who refuses to suggest basic routines, as I have read on here (and experienced) that many do.

Your posts are interesting, haaarp.

Having only the one, I hadn't seen your perspective there, but you put it very well.

personality plays a huge part though. Despite ds1's autism him and ds2 are very similar. (both quite like dh). DS3 is totally different. Staggeringly different. I look at him and wonder where he came from., Although I would only whisper its quietly he's far more like me.

Agree Harpsi (i know, i know, i parped re the Name in the title). But with a second child - you dont have the same time to spend - they have to share you from the outset. They have a sibling from the outset and therefore pick up things from siblings that a lone child wouldnt necessarily pick up so early.

Aside from the fact that all babies are different........

ds2 grew up like an only child though- he didn't have a sibling to copy (well he did but he copied sniffing books, nothing else thank god). DS3 has been much more influenced by ds2, but still his completely different personality shines though.

yes and their different personalities mean we treat them quite differently.
how anyone with any experience whatsover of babies or indeed of people can think that all babies are the same and need the same amount of sleep, food, cuddling, stimulation, will take the exact same amount of time to feed I just find utterly staggering.

agree although suspect the amby is a good sleeping place for many

I'm not an afficianado so I don't want to get into an argument, but if I remember correctly (since I don't own the book you'll be pleased to know) it does clearly state that it is a guide and that every baby is different. But I can see that the way the book is set out and the form of words used in the routines would lead some to take it as gospel.

please QV don't let me go and read the CLBB again
you know where it will lead
I'll start getting all upset about those twins being left without milk for seven hours
so they are nicely screaming the place own with hunger
mmmm
nice

Harpsi, fab posts, especially the one about children in the same family not having the same upbringing. I have personal reasons for that to actually choke me up a little bit. Thanks.

why 7 hours? (dare I ask?) seems a long time

oh twinkle DON'T MAKE ME QUOTE THE BOOK AT YOU.

Ah ha - so YOU own the book do you? Go on, do quote it - I don't mind being proved wrong. She DEFINITELY does say a hungry baby must be fed though.