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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

What's happened to my happy baby (4mo)?

28 replies

GuernseyCow · 29/03/2007 21:16

Help - can anyone explain to me what has happened to my previously happy, smiley baby? Since passing the 14 week mark, DS1 has moved to a default setting of grizzling/crying/shouting, having previously been a very happy little girl. I know she has sore gums, but surely that doesn't make babies miserable for the next two years? Her sleeping patterns have also changed for the worse (up at least 3 times a night now compared to one or two previously) and she seems to sleep much more lightly and is harder to settle. I've read some of the 'sleep is for the weak' thread, but can anyone explain why things change at this point? And can anyone else tell whether, and if so, when things might improve again?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Debbsyandson · 29/03/2007 21:20

Sounds to me like she is weaning herself maybe time to introduce foods speak to yuor hv

SenoraPostrophe · 29/03/2007 21:32

they do go through phases of this kind of thing. I find at about 12-16 weeks they suddenly get more nosy - coming off the boob all the time to have a look around and wanting to be upright. Do you have an upright chair for her? 2 of mine had a baby walker at about this age,not because they could walk in it but because they were happier upright.

Or it could be teething. It usually lasts for 2 or 3 days at a time (well, up to a week) and comes every month or two.

ETsmum · 29/03/2007 21:34

An aside GuernseyCow, are you from Guersney by any chance? Just I live there

Rantum · 29/03/2007 21:38

-Teething pain can last for quite a long time, as Senora says

Growth spurts can be disruptive too
Big developmental leaps often happen around 4 mths as baby begins to be more active and interested in the world and begins to leave the utterly dependant stage behind.

Spidermama · 29/03/2007 21:43

She's very unlikely to be weaning herself at four months. Extremely unlikely. Sorry Debby but that's not good advice.

With my four this is pretty much the time where they start feeling the pain of teething. She won't remain miserable for two years but you have to remember she hasn't felt much pain or discomfort in life yet so it's a bit of a shock to her.

Don't worry it doesn't go on andf on. It's very wearing I know, but it'll come and go and she'll get used to it.

They like biting on teething toys at this stage. Some people like those homeopathic teething powders made by Nelson I think. You can get teething gel too but I didn't like putting slightly nasty looking dubious chemicals in my baby's mouth.

This is hard for you GC, but you just have to give in and comfort and feed her just as much as she wants.

Good luck.

Original poster

GuernseyCow · 29/03/2007 21:46

I guess I should try to be positive about this if it really is linked to developmental change, but it's very hard work! Good to know that teething pain won't last too long, so hopefully we'll see some improvement soon. I hadn't even thought about weaning (had assumed I have to wait until 6 months) but will certainly check this out as DD1 keeps lunging for my lunch. ETsmum - I am indeed a Guernsey girl but don't live there any more, worse luck. Thanks all!

OP posts:

Debbsyandson · 29/03/2007 21:54

Sorry spidermama was only trying to help,im a first time mum so i listen to what every bit of conversation i can about babies and i was just saying that could be a possiblility as this hasd just happened to my friends little girl at bang on 4 mths so on the hv advice she gave her a bit of baby rice,or porridge (cant remember which) to settle her it worked.ds is 14 weeks old and his sleeping patterns are changing all the time he too is teething,and has mega growth spurts.

blobofblobsville · 29/03/2007 21:57

What? Time to introduce foods at 14 weeks Debby? No no no no...not until 6 months < wanders off tutting loudly>

Probably teething - really can make a difference to moods- dd did the same

Debbsyandson · 29/03/2007 22:01

Why cause thats what they recommend?,well they are recommending new things all the time, a few yrs ago it was weaning started at 4 mths all im saying you know your baby,and what to give her if its not teething or a growth spurt then maybe its that!im in no way an expert i still have my l plates on.

Spidermama · 29/03/2007 22:02

Hi debbys. I hope you don't think me arsey. Advice nowadays is to hold off weaning until at least six months. One of mine didn't bother with solids until he was almost one. I just felt the need to set the record straight as so many women are given dodgy advice by health visitors and the like which means they wean too early and regret it.

I'm still feeding my two year old and I've always let my babies wean gradually in their own time. I've got four kids and the first three kept having milk until they were two and three. Not much by then of course, but it phased out beautifully smoothly and seamlessly.

I'm not saying this approach is for everyone, but in terms of the baby's nutritional and emotional needs, and to cut down on the likelyhood they'll develop of allergies, it's best to hold off introducing anything other than milk until the baby is six months old.

Debbsyandson · 29/03/2007 22:04

No no not at all spidermama like i say i still hae l plates on

Rantum · 29/03/2007 22:06

Debs - don't worry too much - it is probably not such a good idea to wean babies onto solids before 6 months but it is something that I also did because that was the advice my HV gave me when ds was really unsettled at 4 mths - she told me that because ds was so big he was probably more hungry than other babies (bad advice with hindsight - he was growing steadily and showed no signs of increased hunger) and I did not have the benefit of MN at the time to give me alternatives. That said - he took to the food fine - and it did not do any damage. I bf him til he was a year old despite giving him solids at 4 mths and he is a very tall healthy 2 year old now. So it is hardly the end of the world. It is just better to have alot of information so that you can truly make an informed choice for your own baby - something that I did not have.

Spidermama · 29/03/2007 22:08

The thing is too that women can think, at this stage, the baby is unsatisfied and hungry because the baby is drinking more milk. But remember, they want milk for comfort, not just nutrition.

Debbsyandson · 29/03/2007 22:10

very true

Rantum · 29/03/2007 22:13

Anyway - and I don't want to start a MN foodie war - but I know one RL Mum who bf her child for two years, went around being all superior about it, letting her dd "self wean". Fine you might say, except whenever I saw her dd she was busy tucking into cadbury's buttons, hula hoops and crisps in between sampling her Mummy's offerings.

Compared to that a bit of pureed broccolli is really not the end of the world ...[antagonistic emoticon inserted here]

oremstango · 30/03/2007 17:36

Guensey- I feel your pain. Have had such a miserable week with my son who is 16 weeks. He was just settling in to a pattern on night sleep and nats, and now seems to be super unsettled and unable to get himself calmed down. I have no idea what's going on but feel really down. He usually sleeps 4-5 hours across 3 naps, today slept around 45 minutes across 3 after hours of rocking. Trying to stay positive on this but really feeling down as I can't figure out why the change. Only thing is he was able to suck his thumb before and this weeks seems unable to 'find' it which is also really bothering him.

HV in our area say no solids pre-20 weeks.

suwoo · 30/03/2007 17:45

Glad its not just me then!! DS is nearly 16 weeks and has become very unsettled, particularly in the night. I am so tired I am a bit down, but persevering. Its interesting to see this might be a developmental thing, although I don't remember this happening with DD, she is 5 now though.

oremstango · 30/03/2007 20:19

In looking through it more I'm getting convinced it's teething- will start a thread for more feedback...

mamijacacalys · 30/03/2007 21:09

Probably teething.
My DD started at this age (hard gums, dribbling, unsettled, nappy rash). Her first tooth came through at 6 months, mid Jan, and she now has 6, which roughly averages 1 every 10 days or so. Has been knackering!
OTOH, DS didn't cut his first tooth until he was 1 so went through the dirupted night thing at a later stage and was hard as he had been sleeping through for a while by then. So at least it will be over sooner with your DD and you will get your sleep routine back.
It will get better. HTH

Original poster

GuernseyCow · 30/03/2007 22:45

Oremstango and Suwoo, good to know we're not the only family whose baby has been (temporarily, we hope) swapped for a dribbly sleep-avoiding grizzler, although sorry you're having a hard time! On the plus side, we've just had our first really smiley day in two weeks, although sleep patterns are still all over the place. So long as DD can raise a few smiles I'm sure we can get through this - I was just so worried we were seeing signs of generally grumpy temperament emerging. I'm going to invest in some Medised for bad nights and will keep trying to remember she has a reason for being miserable, poor soul. Hope things improve for you soon too!

OP posts:

cruisemum1 · 31/03/2007 09:17

guernseycow- our lo's all developed bad sleep habits at 4 months. We are on Sleep is for the Weak. We seem to be coming through it slowly but surely - at 6months or so.... you are welcome to join us!

cruisemum1 · 31/03/2007 09:18

btw - the thread is on the 'sleep' category....

Elibean · 31/03/2007 22:22

Mine too...probably teething, though I agree with whoever said the developmental stuff takes a big shift around now. dd2 is suddenly rolling, trying to sit up, lunging at things, grabbing toys, and squawking like a parrot (hitherto silent, apart from squeaky noises due to a floppy larynx).

Re weaning early (ie before the now-recommended six months) I personally believe there is some room for individual needs here. Both my dds have suffered from silent reflux, this one more severely (again due to her larynx), and dd changed to being a much happier baby after starting solids at 4.5 months. I'm talking the least allergenic foods here, nothing complicated. I did carry on BFing too, its just that solids helped her digestion.

Though thats not relevent to the OP, by the sounds of it

Elibean · 31/03/2007 22:23

And in fact...I seem to recall bad sleep resurfacing every time dd1 took a developmental leap: something to do with all those busy synapses in the brain, maybe

PavlovtheCatthatgottheCremeEgg · 31/03/2007 22:30

teething for my LO. went 1-2 timesduring the night until just before 6 months, then on 13 Dec she got a small cold, and woke up lots and from then on, a nightmare, until her first tooth arrived 8-10 weeks later. Then it got better, but I had to follow pu/pd to re-teach her how to get back to sleep (and to stop Bf her each time she woke!) It will get better

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