iPads for young kids... yes or no?

[blossombird]

I've a feeling this is going to be a touchy subject but....

DH and I are going out tonight for a meal with our 2yo DS. DH wants me to bring the iPad for him. he's been saying about setting the iPad up for a while, we don't use it anymore (more than enough technology going on with a smartphone each and laptop between us) so he wants me to find some age appropriate apps and download a couple of DS favourite programmes to keep him occupied while out and about.
My argument to this is - we didn't have iPads or portable tech and we managed on just fine without. If a colouring book and crayons was enough to satisfy me when I was a child at a restaurant then why isn't it good enough for DS. I think it's setting a bad start to showing DS sociablility skills (if that's even a word lol) if he thinks he can sit through a meal glued to a screen. DH thinks I'm mad and need to go with the times lol he says everywhere you go toddlers and kids have iPads or their parents phones to play with to stop them getting bored at "adult things" such as meals out (which tbf are few and far between just that tonight is a special occasion for us) and shopping days. We're expecting DS2 this summer and DH thinks I'm making a rod for my own back by holding out on the iPad thing, he thinks my life will be a lot easier if when I need time with DS2 to feed or change or just 5 mins to myself I can give DS1 the iPad and know he'll be able to entertain himself for a few minutes at a time. DS hates shopping (like walk around the shops clothes shopping) so I don't go, I order all things I need online and go to the park or somewhere DS enjoys instead but again DH says if I can set the iPad up for him I'd buy a bit of "me time" to walk around the shops knowing he's not going to kick off in the pram or run off as I'm trying something on.
I really don't want my child glued to a screen all the time I don't think it's healthy, he has tv at home and I want him to see the world and take things in when we're out but DH thinks there is a middle ground where he can do both.

What are parents thoughts on this? Am I being too old fashioned or should I stick to my guns with this?

I don't take my iPad out with me when taking 2 yo DS, he can make do with either the crayons often provided in restaurants or the mini cars or trains that are always in the bottom of my bag.
I choose not to go down the route of the tablet because firstly I could not afford to trust 2yo with something that expensive when we're outside the home, secondly because he becomes extremely ignorant the second he gets his hand on the pad and this infuriates me so I've actually banned his usage completely never mind when out and about.

I know many do judge when they see a child with a tablet in a restaurant but I never do (even though I don't take one myself), if it makes life easier for people then why not utilise what works for you and your little ones.

I'm a Dad and a creative director working in digital advertising. I was looking at my son's toys and thought these are so much better than anything an iPad can do. But having thought that, it really comes down to one thing, spending time with your kids while they play, explore and interact with whatever is around them.

I made this blog as a result of my thinking. My sons toys as if they were apps – toysnotapps.tumblr.com/

It's alright people saying 'keep the toddlers entertained by talking to them' oh really, I never thought of that!!!

We like to eat out quite a lot and my 2yo is quite a lot of a handful. Not that we whip out the iPad as soon as we get there but it's a tool in the bag if things start going a bit pear shaped. Doesn't always work but worth a shot.

Completely agree..it's just too unrealistic to expect to raise them tech- free.

My 2yo getting a bit obsessed with YouTube though.
Finding out books are becoming a worthwhile investment, nothing like sitting them on your lap and watching their face light up as you engage them in a story.

People love to handwring about this but I don't see the problem in busting out some peppa pig in an emergency. My 21m old dd is actually pretty good at eating out but if she's really tired and the food is taking ages and she's getting restless then yeah, the iPhone comes out for a bit.

She also watches a fair bit of cbeebies at the mo cos I've got a newborn too. She is somehow still incredibly sociable, spent ages talking to some strangers on the train today, plays great with other kids and shares, and plays lovely imaginative games at home with her toys on her own. Cbeebies is just a small part of her overall day. She's also talking in sentences already.

We don't let our dc use I pads/tablets when out and about. Our 2 year old doesn't use them at all and our 3.5 year old only ever goes on the tablet in our bed if we want to lie in! We tend to eat out in family friendly places where you're in and out in a reasonable time though. I suppose if we were going to be somewhere for a long time I might take it as a back up.

Tricky. I'm not at all anti tech, but meal times out with little kids are such a great learning time for them - manners, social interaction, conversation, etc...

FWIW going through many many not particularly fun meals out with a toddler (including a lot of leaving after ten minutes) meant that we had a three year old who is delightful in cafes.

Very interesting to hear others veiws on this. I hate it when my husband sets up peppa pig as soon as we stop in coffee shop ect. But I also find it as embarrassing when wriggling toddler causing havoc.

Theres definitely a balance- and anyone watching can't know full circumstances. We spent 2 hours having a great time wearing the kids out on a playground with other family. Then we stop for lunch, a bit too near nap time as had been too busy playing, then absolutely I feel no guilt in plonking them in front of our phone so adults can enjoy lunch without kids going off that rails.
However other times I feel if the place isn't suitable for our 2 year old , why are we insisting on going there.

My DD is 2 and hasn't yet seen an iPad. A couple of her friends the same age have had iPads introduced for exactly the circumstances you describe and their parents have told me they wish they hadn't started as it has now become an expectation. So as soon as they are not occupied with something else or as soon as they arrive at a cafe etc the demands for the iPad start. It does their heads in. Her 2 year old friend came to play with his mum yesterday and wouldn't play with any of DDs toys, just repeatedly asked his mum for the iPad which she hadn't brought so it ended in tears. I don't think all kids are like this - but mine definitely is! I just know she would become obsessed with it the same way and it would be hard to engage her in anything else. I don't judge the other parents because if I hadn't seen them have these problems first I honestly think I'd have given her a go with one!

I agree that most 2 year olds would struggle to sit in a restaurant. Mine won't - she will behave for as long as there is food in front of her! Sometimes we can engage her in colouring but not for long. So we do short trips for coffee as a treat now and then and leave when we feel she's getting to the end of her patience. At least this way she is getting the social experience, seeing how others behave, watching those around her. She knows she has to wait and that her food/ biscuit whatever will come, she knows not to touch the coffee because it's hot etc I think that if the iPad was in front of her she wouldn't take any of it in and wouldn't ever get any better at doing it!