Did anyone have a child with limited understanding at 18-20 months?

[mscongeniality]

My son had an appointment with a Paediatrician yesterday due to his lack of speech at almost 20 months and she thinks its better to get him early intervention now rather than later.

My bigger concern is that he doesn't seem to understand or respond to simple tasks and commands either so his language can't progress until he starts understanding it.

I'm just wondering if anyone had an 18-20 month child who had limited understanding but started progressing later?

Hi,I am very worried and I really need help,I have a son 19 month,he was all time very smiling,he plays peak aboo,He comes to me for hug or if he want something he take me for hand and he sendme in whatever he want,80%he respond his name only if is busy with something interesting,but he doesn't share,if I drop a ball he doesn't kick back,If I am building blocks he just distros them,he points ,he bubble a lot and he as 5 words,I have a baby 4 month and he doesn't engage with here,if she cries he just want to go out,when I feed her he gets jealous,only thing why he goes to her is to take her dummy,he understand only the word no and com here,he doesn't bring me toys or he doesn't bring me his shoes or the ball when I ask him,,,,I have see my friend child 15 month and he was so engaged with all,my son star to spin toys and he open e close his eyes,walk back and forth and is very hard to get his attention usually...I am very worried about him...HV check him at 16 month and she told me looks fine,He had ear infection and there cure with antibiotic 6 days but now he touche his ears all day and I'm thinking to do hearing test...he reach his arms when I want to be held,he try to take my hand to do evrything,he doesn't wave bye bye only he clap,sometime he copys what he sees in TV ore what I do...I am very concerned please help

@mscongeniality i know this is an old thread, but how is your little one doing?

[quote RedC83]@mscongeniality i know this is an old thread, but how is your little one doing?[/quote]
Hi, thanks for the tag!

It's been a while since I last updated. My DS is 5.5 now and in Y1 (mainstream). He's doing really well, can talk loads, communicates about all his wants and needs. He's taken to reading very well and is comletely age appropriate (if not slightly ahead!). He's doing ok in maths too and his handwriting is really good for his age. He could barely draw a line when he started in Reception a year ago and couldn't read any words but has done really well.

It took him a while to get going though and his communication is still behind as compared to his peers. He struggles to listen and absorb information/instructions if there's a lot at once, so his teacher usually has to explain work to him one on one. He's also seeing a private SALT and she has assessed that his vocabulary is age appropriate but he struggles to pull words together into sentences sometimes. He has trouble with answering any detailed 'why' or 'what' questions.

He doesn't have any diagnosiss yet but I've been looking into Auditory Processing Disorder a bit. I've started a referral for him through the NHS just to see if an actual diagnosis could help him further.

Otherwise he's a very happy social little guy and no one can tell of his communication struggles at first glance.

Happy to answer any other questions!

Hello. I m a worried mom of two year old daughter. she is not responding her name but when she is in one room and I m in other room and I call her naw she responds but not all the time. She sometimes plays peekaboo. When she was around 18 months she gave us high five , she imitate a little , when I sang rhymes she performs but now she stopped doing it. Her eye contact is also limited she looks at me when I sing rhymes. She does not play with her toys. She says only five words. She loves to be cuddling she opens her arm to carry her. She turns off the switch when I say to her but only when I m holding her . She points a little bit when I show her the brush she opens her mouth for brushing she has no repetitive behavior no sensory disorder she doesn’t follow the instructions . I searched all this in google and they all indicate to autism . Can you all pls help me I m very concerned. Thanks

@mscongeniality Oh wow that's amazing to hear that he's doing so well, and I hope that continues. I hope he continues to overcome his communication struggles - I am sure he will!
It's reassuring to read this. While I know all children are different, your little one sounded very similar to my little girl who is nearly 20 months and seems very limited in her comprehension. I have days where I am certain she'll get there (wherever "there" is!) in her own time, and other days where I am convinced she is autistic and I am not helping her as well as I would like. It's a pretty unsettling time this age as I am sure you recall!
Thanks for your message - sometimes it's just nice to hear some positive stories

@mscongeniality thank you for continuing to post updates, it really helps! I have a little one who has receptive language issues at 18 months

Hi, can you update about your son 4 years on please? My son is showing bahaviour. Many thanks

a similar bahaviour I meant, many thanks!

@mscongeniality hello, what great progress your son has made since your very first message in 2016, it has been lovely reading this thread and it’s been reassuring at the same time. I am going through exactly what you did when you started this thread. My daughter is 17m and is extremely delayed with reaching her milestones also there is no understanding. She sometimes is in her own world, she makes great eye contact and is very smiley happy baby. I am extremely worried about her, but reading this thread has made me feel better, I know all children are different and press in their own way. I look forward to another update from you.

hi mscongeniality

my son is 18 months old and he is same as your child as you explaining about your .. how he is now i am relly worried right now i want to is it normal in kids speech delay and eating only pureers in this age .. he also do not want to eat finger food
he start pertanding like he cannot swallow from his throat. its may me reaaly worriy right now .. if you can reply. it will be great please

Hi,

I know i am resurrecting a really old post. My son is 15 month old and also exihibiting exact same behaviour traits as mentioned by OP. He don’t understand simple commands, do repeat a few words after us, doesn’t understand mumma, dadda, likes opening boxes and almost everything that OP told in various comments. If you don’t mind sharing

1. at what as did your child started understanding commands
2. Our son haven’t started walking yet, was it same with you.
3. did your child get diagnosed at the end, if yes, what was the diagnosis.

I know this is a long shot, but a really worried mumma here who would appreciate any help on this. Thanks in advance.

@seemaverma
Hi
This thread is the only thread that's giving me some perspective and some signs of hope

@seemaverma my son is exactly in the same age ...he completed 16 months.. he shows no signs of understanding simple commands.. he doesn't want to intentionally obey my instructions and put things in a box but on observation if it interests him he will put it in the box !!

He doesnt share interests.. like bringing a toy to me.. or asking me to help him or do something.. he would communicate only through whining... he would beat my DH on his shoulder if he wants to be taken out the moment he sees the door open..

He has good eye contact but chooses not to look at r faces much and would wanna jus walk and explore and be engrossed in a play of scratching textured surfaces.. he doesnt do it that long as he used to but still is inclined to such kinda play..

Not interested to throw a ball at us even if we repeatedly ask.

Doesnt point but shows his understanding by looking at the object we are talking about.

Where is the light.? He looks up
Clap ur hands . He claps

Where is the bed?
He thumps the bed

Wheres the tummy ? He beats his tummy

Make piggy face.. he makes a piggy face

These commands he shows his understanding..but is still not following instructions

Also my son loves to play peek a boo and would create his own games by catching r attention and jumping and hugging us...its only his non verbal communication to express things to us that freaks me out..

He does have stranger anxiety as due to covid we arent allowing him to engage and socialise much ..

He also seems to love touching surfaces a lot or watching his hands now and then ans does flap his arms only when excited or irritated and not all the time ..but am I reading into it too much because Google immediately points out to autism ??

He loves to cuddle and is very engaging and loving that way but definitely seems easily distracted and wouldnt respond to name all the time but when DH returns from work and opens the door he is all smiles dashing to him to be lifted up!

I am a very confused anxious momma seeking some re assurance here and I cant agree enough about how the rest of the mummas handle this stress ... I am with u all !!

@Mby8489
Our son also matches a lot with what you described. Other than things i mentioned in my last comment.

1. Yeah, he also doesn't like to ask for help. He likes going outside, so holds our finger and forces us to walk outside. Similarly if he wants a toy, he tries to reach it on his own as much as possible, otherwise keep looking at the toy and starts crying in frustrated manner(instead of looking at us and pointing or something)
2. +1 on eye contact. He does make good eye contact 50-60% of the time.
3. Our son likes to play throw a ball kind of game. Though gets bored in 9-10 rounds.
4. he also does responds on normal fun commands like clap your hands, give me(holds us whatever he is holding), make surprise face and does that, open the door.
5. +1 loves to play peek a boo. looks into eyes as well at that time.
6. We try to socialize, but he doesn't let anyone lay a finger on him. He is happy with us, cuddles with us on his own but none of our friends can hold him.
7. He likes to look at other children play, but pushes them away if they come close.
8. He only likes to touch hard surfaces. Walks away from soft/wet surfaces. for eg., don't like play dough, wet artificial sand. Starts looking and cleaning his fingers if he somehow touches these.
9. +1 to hand flapping. Only does when excited.

10. He recently started responding to his name more frequently. Still not at par with other children his age but much much better. 11. +1 he smiles and makes eye contact when he finds one of the parent after few hours.

We are mainly concerned about.

1. He never crawled. And only walks if we hold his fingers. This is have a big negative impact on things that he can explorer.
2. Food, He is highly picky about his food. Only eats mashed chapatti in curry and that too refuses most of the time, takes more than an hour to eat half chapatti on best days. Any other texture he would refuse right away.
3. We have to feed him. There are very rare events when he puts anything in his mouth on his own. If it is food he doesn't even touch let alone take it to his mouth.
4. Eye contact. Yes it worries us a lot. He smiles and looks at us but doesn't make eye contact when he needs something.

We are also really confused. As you said google always points to autism for even a littlest sign that we google. Even things like global delay or something ultimately points to autism.

FYI, We are working towards improving his eye contact. We believe that's the root cause of many things and it'll help him a lot if we can make that better.

Hi seema

1. This is exactly what my son does.. he also doesnt point at the toy and ask for help but I would say make sure u closely notice him at times.. because why am saying this is my son likes this musical toy with buttons and I didnt switch it on.. and he was fiddling with the buttons for few seconds and then he clearly looked up at me into my eyes and said aaah and tapped at the buttons.. this is a cue that he wants it switched on.. so I spoke to him back like as though I understood his cue and said ok u want me to switch it ?? Lemme do it for u and then he did allow me to do it.. this has never happened before at all as he would jus give up and move on but lately I have been interacting a lot and I believe he is comprehending that and reaching out to me.. so pls keep interacting as much and dont give up hope.. look for his cues whenever u can but dont obsess abt it either..

1. Yes the eye contact is still a hit and miss here because I feel my son is too engrossed in his own plays and moves around and jus explores stuffs on his own but lately I have been speaking in very exaggerated tones and I place a toy in front of him and speak animatedly and this distracts him from his world for a few seconds he is compelled to make eye contact with me.. have a ritual where u do rhymes sing along with him during the day or night and sing.. read and talk a lot...I think this is the key to slowly get him Interested. And in my observation too I get only 50 percent eye contact and even now he always doesnt look at me.. still working on it

1. He still doesnt like to play throw a ball much.. easily gets bored in jus 3 rounds and moves on to something else.. but he enjoyed hiding stuffs under the cups to find and he has been engaged in this new game lately.. but back and forth ball game still doesnt thrill him .

1. All same but my son used to hand out things to me atleast once and twice when asked .. but now he refuses to.. he jus throws it on the floor and walks away when asked and this does worry me but I tell myself he will come around.

1. Peek a boo is a super hit with him and he creates his own peek a boo game by hiding behind my shoulder and excitedly looking into my face when I turn back to meet his gaze.. this is one time I feel he makes the best eye contact with a willingness to look at me.

1. Yes has stranger anxiety and takes atleast an hour to warm up but will let them keep him on his lap quietly for sometime but then again not all the time.. mostly sticks to his dad or me.. this is understandable as we haven't been clearly socialising much with others during these covid times.

1. This am still unsure as of now how much he likes looking at other kids as he hasnt been around them much but he is more interested as of now to look up at the moon or plane. Birds.. cats ...buses and cars than other people.. this does bother me a little but I beleive he hasnt gotten the much needed exposure too.

1. Loves to rub textured walls and rough surfaces but also loves to be in the pool and beach and loves water play and so far has been able to handle both dry and wet surfaces. But this does alarm me cuz he tends to rub walls and textured play mats a lot but the difference i notice is the time spent on doing this has lessened in recent days

1. Yes here too hand flapping when very irritated or wants a change In his song when we play music.. or wants me to stop feeding him.. it feels more like a response to stress irritation or anger rather than him involuntarily doing it..

10. Definitely smiles and dashes to the parent who he sees after few hours and shows a lot of excitement on their arrival.example DH returning from work . And my son would seek his voice from wherever he hears it and jumps to greet him

Now coming to ur areas of concern

1. About crawling!! Nope nope don worry at all about this I assure u many children skip crawling altogether and aim for walking.. as long as he is walking steadily holding ur finger thats fine !! Because my son also didnt walk in the 12 month mark as most kids do and he started Walking only on the soft bed surface when he turned 14 months and yet he took another 1 month to confidently do the same on the hard surface... we kept taking him out and politely asking him to leave r hand and then he explored and independently started walking at 15 months and now he jus moves around on his own .. I think this has also got to do with his personality because I observe my son being very cautious when he walks on the road and holds r hand at times to not fall off a curb.. he is very careful to not scrape his knee. But at home he walks around freely devoid of fear of falling.

1. Food .. yes he also doesnt eat on his own at all ! But we also fed him from the beginning.. and he used to refuse idly upma but now he does eat different textures.. he takes the food we eat and I have stopped mashing rice or chapati much but I jus lightly mash it with my fingers.. I feel he still doesnt know how to put food in his mouth by himself and I think we must start training them to from atleast now.

1. My son also doesnt put things in his mouth let alone food too.. and we have to only feed him. He puts a cup shaped toy to his mouth but no other toy as far as I have noticed. And yes he takes minimum an hour to eat !! This is normal my doctor said that some kids take long to finish and dont show great curiosity to eat .

1. I understand the concern u have about the eye contact because I go through the very same.. how will my son learn what I tell and ask or do if he is busy with his own play. This does worry me but i ensure i keep trying to engage him .. and also they still have time to learn and comprehend as they are not too old either if u think.

And I completely agree with him Google only points to autism and it's good to have the knowledge but I beleive there are many other positives to look for in r case that we must keep trying and give them their space and time to blossom and flourish too..

From what I beleive and u said it rightly.. must work on improving their eye contact and engage them with as much play and interaction and also to give them just a little bit more time to reveal their selves.. I hope the sharing of views helped and pls keep writing would love to learn more .. thank u

Hi everyone, any updates from anyone would be kindly appreciated. My son is 19 months and showing lots of the same signs as op - really worried mum!

@Nkaur25 @seemaverma @Mby8489 any updates on how youre all doing would be very welcome - very worried mum!

Hello

hi @mscongeniality hows your son now? i also in same situation not sure if he is a late bloomer or asd. i some times feel he is typical whereas some times he puts me in worries. your post just put my currents thoughts and i also saw your posts in later stages till 26 months. so i wonder how your son turned out to be ?

@Coffeemachine

Hi,

My DS is very slow in terms of his understanding. Please could you tell me what was the reason your Dd was diagnosed as autistic? Were there any early signs of autism that she showed?

Thanks for the update how wonderful your son is doing so well!😍

Do you have an update?

my son had glue ear and quite a few ear infections and we noticed a big regression. We paid private for an ENT specialist and was hoping surgery would help and he’d progress however we was told at his appointment it’s now cleared up and he has no issue with fluid and glue ear.

hes just turned 19 months and he’s started responding to his name again 50% of the time and he’s babbling a lot more again like he was at 13/14 months. Definitely saying a couple of words here and there. He does like sensory a lot and never sits still. I’ve been getting myself in a state everyday as I’ve been trying everything but it’s so hard to get him to sit still and focus. It’s like he can’t hear me? I know he can because he runs from rooms away for his favourite tv shows😂 I’ve got another hearing test coming up because they couldn’t do one originally due to the fluid in his ears!
Hes good with eye contact and very cuddly, he has no problem being around other adults or children and very happy in general

Hi I know this is very old post but I was wondering how did everything turned out in the end ? ☺️

Hi x do you happen to have an update please ? X

Hi how’s your son doing now ? Xx I know it is an old post ☺️