Anyone using the Baby Whisperer method of getting baby to sleep?

[cruisemum1]

My ds now 10 weeks is reluctant to go to bed in his cot without first being rocked and/or bf to sleep. He usually crashes out by 10pm after two or three failed attempts at putting him in his cot (sometimes awake, sometimes already asleep)I am starting to get very frustrated now as I have a dd age 8.5yrs who needs me too! Any advice/suggestions/tips? I cannot/would not leave him to CIO as it is not fair on anybody (including dd who needs to get up for school at 7am) HELP!!

I used the baby whisperer book and got alot of useful info from it - I can't remember the bedtime routine (5 years ago!) - but thought her ideas were well grounded. I found the different types of crying really really helpful - got me out of constantly feeding! There is alot of conflicting advice about getting babies to sleep - I would take on what you feel happy with and then stick with it - I found confusion leads to more tears all round! If its any help - I used to put ds down quiet and calm, if cried - would go back in and put hand on tummy and stroke head (he still does it himself now!) until calm and then leave again. Would only do this one or two times and if still crying would leave for only five minutes - by which time had tired himself out! If not - would go in and repeat it - never said anything - just having contact was enough to chill him out. DS2 was an angel baby and we never needed to do any of it!

Good luck!

Hi
My DH and I are trying the Baby Whisperer routine - we started yesterday so too early to tell (plus I don't want to jinx it!). Makes a lot of sense though, definitely worth trying.

Yes, I used it from birth and got on really well with it - my DD has never had a sleep problem and soon learnt to sleep through by herself. I would recommend though that you look at her website as well, as some things are more clearly explained there. Also, a great tip from my midwifre was that when you put your LO down to sleep make sure it is on a fleece or you have put a warm hot water bottle there first, just so that the bed is warm and it does not wake the child up- I found that really helped.

HTH and Good luck!

yes i used it from about 2 months as my dd was prem shes never had any problems and slept for six hours between feeds then incressed she is now 22 moonths in single bed and takes herself to bed when shes tired about 7 pm till 7.30 to 8.30 next morning its brilliant advice that method to anyone good luck and stick with it it might have hard times but itll be worth it in long run

seoulmum - how did it go? What did you do and how? did it work?

Baby Whisperer was the approach we started with. Whilst it worked a treat for the evenings, it had no effect for the daytime naps and we had to get progressively more hardcore to get him to sleep when we wanted him to.
Being totally consistent night in night out / every day whilst you get the routine to take is the key thing I think. On the nights it took 3 days to take and another 2 weeks of always doing the same thing for things to run like clockwork.

I have used baby whisperer methods from day 1 (dd is 11 weeks) and in the main it has helped - DD sleeps through from 7.30 (with a dream feed at 10.30) till 6 to 7 and like the other posts say I think the routine of bath, bottle and bed really helped as yomellamoHelly said the night times are great but DD tends to catnap in day and am having problems getting her to take longer naps in her cot. What did you do yomella?

Message withdrawn

I used the methods and thought they were invaluable, made it much easier to understand dd.
Didn't follow rigid routine though, don't like getting up at 7.00am....

Solved practically every problem that arose, and made me wonder what HV get paid for.(Shouldn't they be offering some advice on how to settle babaies)

Highly recommended

What is a babaies?!

I used the books and they were helpful and very "parent-friendly" I thought. The section on body language was especially helpful as it enable me to spread out feeds (by telling when DD was really hungry), get rid of her colic and put her down to sleep without feeding her to sleep. She has had some sleep problems, though, but those have sprung out of her not being tired enough (although showing signs of tiredness) at bedtime. On the whole, though, she has gone to sleep pretty well.

One thing I would mention, which I couldn't find in the book, is that sh/pat is for little babies and pick up/put down is not recommended for babies under 3 months as it can overstimulate them. There is a baby whisperer website which has more detail and advice for people using the techniques. The frequently asked questions in the sleep section might be of help.

My baby (9 weeks) seems to have some kind of reflux, so there is no hope in me following the routine. But the book does mention to sort out any digestive problems first before starting a routine. They were helpful words of advice. There were other bits of advice I liked in there- some pearls of wisdom.
Im a bit more of a lentil-weaver than Tracy Hogg though, and I thought some things she wrote were a bit wrong i.e babies cat-nap in slings- my baby sleeps deeper and for longer in the sling when I am out and about, but wakes after 20 minutes if put down to sleep. Also, she doesnt say it directly but I suspect the book is designed for bottle-fed babies. There is no way a breastfed 4 week old would go 7 hours without feeding at night because night is when the breastmilk is stimulated to be produced.
Another thing I didnt understand is how you are supposed to continue your life following that routine! I just stick my baby in the car and were out in the sling whenever I feel like it. I go to cafes in the day and restaurants in the evening, always with my baby. I go for walks when I feel like it or shopping/visiting friends whenever I want. In a sense, the baby hasnt really altered my life. Dont know if I could say that if my baby was on the routine.

Have you seen gp about reflux? You can get stuff for it.

Sounds like you are doing just fine Sakura - and good for you. Keep going out and about. Some people and babies work better that way, others work better following routines etc. If its working for you then carry on with it and go with the flow I say.

That was good advice re: sorting digestive problems out before trying a routine. If you havent already, I would seek professional advice about dealing with the reflux as fizzbuzz said, it can be treated.

i haven't read this book, but i have done the bath, bottle, bed routine with my ds (10 weeks) and he always goes down at 7pm with no problem - he will very occasionally cry for a few minutes but i leave him as i know he will go off.

the daytime on the other hand is a whole different story - in the last couple of weeks he has begun to cry very suddenly and almost hysterically when he is tired - he will literally go straight from happy and gurgling to full on screaming in seconds. it can take up to 20 mins of cuddling and rocking to calm him and then he falls asleep just as suddenly. sometimes i will then be able to put him down, but sometimes he will begin crying again the second his head touches the pillow and the whole process starts again...

it's driving me a bit mad and i'm ending up letting him sleep on me for all his naps as it's easier and i want him to get some kip. that means i'm spending hours on the sofa with him while he sleeps instead of catching up with all the boring house stuff, or getting myself lunch.

sorry for the ramble, but anyone got any ideas? i have tried leaving him to cry for up to 10 mins but he just gets more and more hysterical.

btw, if he wakes in the night he happily goes back to sleep on his own, i never have to get up for him. also, i have tried putting him down when i know he's about to get tired, but he will simply cry. he can't stay awake for longer than an hour and a half, which doesn't fit with what all the daytime routines for his age say (should be at least 2 hours).

Hi, thanks. I havent been to see anyone, but thats just because shes not really in pain. Its just that she wakes from naps too soon and when she does, she looks like she has a bad taste in her mouth. I think shes regurgitating stomach acid and thats what wakes her up, but she never cries or anything so I thought Id leave it until 12 weeks when most digestion problems clear up, or so I hear. Weirdly enough, she doesnt have this problem at night, after shes been through the moody evening phase that is. I`m going to try cutting coffee out of my diet, because I heard that could help

also, I should mention Im living in a foreign country and they love drugs and medicines here-and they push you to take all kinds of stuff. so I thought Id leave it a bit longer rather than give her something not knowing what it was

Hi Ange - sorry to hear nap time is a bit of a mare I had the same with my 11 week old DD, resisted naps - is now going down for naps but my new problem is only for 45 minutes so now need to extend that (why can they sleep so long at night but can't do an hour in the day???). The baby whisperer would say that leaving DS to cry it out can break trust and she would suggest never leaving baby to cry it out but to build trust back up by staying with him, calming him till he drops off - i have never left DD to cry it out and repetive reassurance does do the trick - but it does take time and paitience (i nearly screamed a few times and needed a big glass of wine )I find it hard that so many people will tell you how to do things differently so please don't think I'm doing that - just thought I'd let you know what helped me

AngeandLuka, dd was like this, naptime nightmare. I used the book to resettle her, when she woke up from naps. It was really helpful and did work. Dd is now 5 months old and naps well now. From what I have heard it is a developmental thing.

So desperate with dd ended up taking her to GP where she SCREAMED and SCREAMED.. Dp had to take her away as was unable to hear what doctor was saying because of the racket!

Do you swaddle him and pat him to sleep? BW recommended this -worked a treat.

thanks for the advice - i went on amazon to order the book and then ended up ordering The Science of Parenting instead, which i've never heard of but the reviews were great!

he was swaddled until about 6 weeks but started to really not like it, now he's in a grobag. i have tried putting him down in my bed and lying next to him to stroke and reassure him until he goes to sleep, but it doesn't work. he will only fall asleep in my arms, then i can sometimes sneak him down... i'm banking on it being a 'stage' and thanking my lucky stars it's only in the daytime!

The book recomends the 4 s's. Swaddle, soothe, shush and stay. They really work even if you don't swaddle.
Eg, have soothing first like lullabies, or rocking(but NOT to sleep). Then lay them down and pat with a steady heartbeat rhythm, saying shush all the time. The patting should work. When they are finally nearly asleep, stay with them until they fall asleep (usually 20 mins-v boring). It really does work, when it is all done together.
Spent so long patting dd that I got ....

RSI! Why did that get missed off last message?!

re day time naps, I have found with DS2 (12 weeks) that it's only in the last week that he's been able to sleep happily for longer than 45 mins in the day - no idea why, but 12 weeks seems like a turning point..

Cruisemum (hi from Sept thread!), I can't remember if your Ds has a dummy? We found that really helped for a bit (although now we've stopped giving him it as he started to wake up even more in the night looking for it!).

lol at fizz - also remebering all the shush patting i've done it was keeping the shushing up that done me in!!!! Fizz any tips on how to extend DD's nap time, she is waking after 45 mins (1 sleep cycle I guess) but unlike nightime will not go back to sleep, so I bring her downstairs (DD beaming and wide awake) and then I turn around and she has dozed off in her bouncy chair and I'm all at myself for bringing her down.