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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Nuddy Pictures???

56 replies

stoppinattwo · 29/10/2006 08:24

DD (age4) has just drawn a v lifelike picture of a man with no clothes on. I asked her to tell me about the picture and she got really angry/embarrassed and told me not to show it to daddy, then she scruched it up and put it in the bin.

(DP and i have always treated nudity in a casual manner although as DD is getting older DP does tend to cover up more.)

I dont want her to be angry about it, can understand the embarrassed, but i also dont want her drawing stuff like that in school . Anyone any ideas??

OP posts:

Schokofruhstucksflockenhasseri · 29/10/2006 09:04

Yes, dont go around in the nude in front of your dd!

Sorry to be unsympathetic, but it always annoys me when mn'ers are smug about "not being prudes" and showing off adult nudity in front of children.

sugarfree · 29/10/2006 09:09

There's a big difference between "treating nudity in a casual manner" and "showing off adult nudity" IMO.
I think it sends some very bad messages about being ashamed of your body if everyone scrabbles for towels and underwear in front of kids.

I think you just need to have another chat with her SAT.

Twoandabump · 29/10/2006 09:10

My ds is 4, and drew a picture of himself at school including all the bits etc. They just said that is it showingthat he is developing awareness of him and his body. They saw nothing wrong in it.

I grew up in a house where no one showed anything, and ended up feeling half nakid even in a T shirt.

Don't worry about it, and if you press her then you might cause more trouble. SHe might be as embarrased drawing a dog say and you see it.

Schokofruhstucksflockenhasseri · 29/10/2006 09:11

er whats the difference sugarfree?

Nobody scrabbles for towels in our household, or shows any shame about our bodies. The question just doesnt arise.

lulumama · 29/10/2006 09:30

why not be naked in front of the kids?????? i don;t mean parading about , bits a- flapping...but if my children should be in my room when i am getting dressed or about to get in the bath...so what?

and i don;t think SA2 was being smug........

i would try the same tactic as when they discover their bits and fiddle a lot....

'no darling, that is something to do in private...not polite to do it in front of people....'

or something like that......

but never with an implication it is dirty/ disgusting or shameful....

DumbledoresGirl · 29/10/2006 09:33

Crikey, dh and I have never covered up in front of the children. My ds1 is now 10 and I did catch him looking at me IYSWIM the other day, but why shouldn't he? It is being embarrassed about the issue that leads to trouble IMO.

misdee · 29/10/2006 09:36

dd1 drew a nuddy picture of a boy with a small willy about the age of 4. she also got embaressed about it, even though i didnt make a fuss of it.

i think its a normal stage.

nogoes · 29/10/2006 09:50

Misdee is right it is just the age. My mum says I was obsessed about boy's bits at that age.

Original poster

stoppinattwo · 29/10/2006 09:53

Schokofruhstucksflockenhasseri were was i being smug (I am probably the unsmuggest person i know please you unsympatheic so and so???

What do you do lock the bathroom/ bedroom door with you lo's on the other side??

Thanks guys I think I will not approach her about it, her reaction showed me she was embarrassed and probably wont draw something like that in school(where i think it would be a touch inappropriate)

Misdee if your DD1 did this at 4 then maybe I can relax a bit, its probably one of those embarrasing child moments

OP posts:

Twoandabump · 29/10/2006 10:00

I just had a thought as well - my sisters dd was found lining up the lads at school looking at all their willies about that age and saying "Hmm, my daddy's is bigger than yours" to them all lol.

Think is just a phase that they are noticing that they are different to boys.

SoupDragon · 29/10/2006 10:03

I do wonder how you teach them on one hand that nudity is fine but on the other that drawing nude pictures at school isn't.

I'm not being critical at all, I'm just curious. When they're older you can explain things better but it would be very difficult (IMO) to say "oh yes, nudity's nothing to be ashamed of but don't draw this as school"

Sheraz · 29/10/2006 10:06

Absolutely nothing to worry about, unless your 6 yr old DS tells you you have the biggest bum in the world when you are getting dressed! Kids are just naturally curious about all bodies. Wouldn't worry AT all.

Schokofruhstucksflockenhasseri · 29/10/2006 12:56

stoppingat2, no I wasnt accusing you of being smug, it was just a rant about threads in the past, and posts that come over as smugly implying that everyone who doesnt parade around in the nude, (and sorry but there really is NO difference between parading around, and letting your children in teh bathroom when you are getting in the bath) must automatically be a prude. And heaven forbid that anyone should be a prude

MaloryTowersBigHeadBigNorks · 29/10/2006 12:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

screamsprout · 29/10/2006 13:00

Um, parading is when you are marching around, possibly with a pipe band and getting out of the bath is, well, getting out of the bath. Letting your children see that there are some times when (gasp!) we have no clothes on is actually ok. Unless you are really screwed up of course

Schokofruhstucksflockenhasseri · 29/10/2006 13:00

See the OP?
my mother was fairly "relaxed" about nudity when I was a child. I have to say, that I found her body repulsively ugly! She pretty quickly stopped when I was around 5, and drew a picture of her on the lavatory.

Schokofruhstucksflockenhasseri · 29/10/2006 13:01

No screamsprout that is precisely the point. There is nothing weird about not being nude in front of your children.

lulumama · 29/10/2006 13:01

there is absolutely a difference IMO

being naked at certain times of the day is normal. such as getting dressed & undressed . getting ready for the bath.

i would not say, sit down with DS to do his homework with no clothes on...that would be parading nudity and not appropriate .

i want my kids to rejoice in their bodies.and be comfortable in their skin. if i can facilitate that by them seeing me comfortable in my skin...then fine.

lulumama · 29/10/2006 13:01

why wouldn;t you let the kids see you nude if it was a normal time to be naked?

MaloryTowersBigHeadBigNorks · 29/10/2006 13:02

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

swifter · 29/10/2006 13:02

My DS is always allowed in the bathrrom when I am in the bath - he sits on the floor and plays with his toys and will come and give me the odd prod and pull my hair then go back to his toys

i think it's lovely

MaloryTowersBigHeadBigNorks · 29/10/2006 13:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

lulumama · 29/10/2006 13:03

ROFL at pipe band!!

Schokofruhstucksflockenhasseri · 29/10/2006 13:03

To me, it is a bit wierd to make a difference like that. Nudity is nudity, whatever time of day it is! If you dont mind nudity, then whyever not let your children do their homework starkers, while you cook supper in just an apron?

double standards here???

MaloryTowersBigHeadBigNorks · 29/10/2006 13:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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