At what age could you go out for lunch and it didn't end up a disaster?

[LindsayS79]

DD is almost 20 months and is hard work. The tantrums are becoming awful and she's crying all the time when she can't get what she wants (usually things like trying to open a hot oven etc!)
I've had to brave taking her out for lunch a couple of times lately to meet friends and it's been horrendous. I had to leave halfway through lunch with a friend I've not seen in ages because of her behaviour. She won't sit in the high chair for a second. She wants to crawl all over the table and grab everyone's drinks. She then tries to drag me away to walk around the restaurant with her and screams the place down when that doesn't happen!
Can someone with similar experience please tell me it gets better..? I'm so sick of seeing well behaved babies/toddlers sitting in a highchair for ages while mine is screaming!! P.S. I've tried sticker books, colouring in etc, to no avail

Yes yes with eating with one hand! I order food that's not too messy to eat without a knife. I also pre cut the whole plate first. I have such sophisticated manners

I have a 5mo old too. She sits on my lap. But I know this time it will just be a phase.

It's hit and miss with 4yo ds. It helps when we tire him out first with a long walk or run around. We've taken him out since newborn so it doesn't necessarily follow that if you get them used to it they'll be ok. He's just high energy and gets bored easily - even toys, crayons etc at the table don't hold his attention. I've lost count of the number of drinks he's sent flying. He's a fiddler and has to touch everything.

The trouble is that others in my extended family just don't understand. My parents took me and my sisters out for lunch all the time, often for really long meals in posh restaurants and we were apparently really easy. I'm envious of my dsis because my dniece is exactly the same - easily entertained and for long periods by arty things at the table. We invariably eat at places with play areas or other entertainment. Summer is much easier as there are loads of pubs near us with big beer gardens and climbing frames etc. I love the summer because meals are much less stressful!

We have also invested in technology and cbeebies between courses - something i said I'd never do! To be fair to ds, things are improving it just very much depends on his mood.

DS is 2.6 and pretty good eating out. He is very 'spirited' though so I've had to work hard to make him user-friendly. I normally have a treat such as pom bears for him to tuck into if food will be a while. He is also (helpfully) obsessed with orange juice which he doesn't get at home so he is always allowed something like a squash or fruitshoot type thing if he behaves. I keep a special toy - a pretend Swiss army knife with loads of plastic features in the change bag which he only plays with when eating out and a tablet with peppa pig loaded on to keep him amused after he has finished eating.
To be honest I never thought I'd be the type of mother who allowed pombears and fruitshoots etc but it works for us. DS sits on his bottom in a high chair and eats his lunch or dinner without causing a huge scene while we also have a semblance of a nice meal.
I've just booked a huge family meal for mothers day and I'm not even scared. FIL is pretty good at entertaining with funny faces so that should help. Planning is everything I reckon.

DD at 4.5 is finally able to sit still and behave nicely for about half an hour. Makes a mess though!

My DS is 23 months and similar.

Best meal of the day to eat out (if you can persuade anyone to join you) is breakfast. He's fresh, very hungry and places aren't crowded. A couple of toys, some snacks to nibble while we wait for food and it's okay...ish

Dd is 2.9 and is still difficult to take out. We do take her but it has to be quick. If the service takes a long time I can feel my blood pressure rising as I know things will take a turn for the worse any minute. She doesn't last long with stickers and activities such as drawing and the next thing she will be standing on the chair, climbing on the table, sitting under the table then announce to the whole restaurant "I've done a poo!" In a very loud voice. If things take too long she will go into tantrum mode like last week when we met some friends for lunch. Their ds was as good as gold throughout while dd had a meltdown as we waited for the bill. She wanted to go with daddy to the men's toilet and when I said no all hell broke loose and it wasn't pretty. It was a restaurant stopper and everyone looked at us and I caught a table of old women staring over and looking absolutely horrified. I had to take her straight out to the car, by then she was past tantrum and in complete meltdown. So lunches out are still very difficult and I do often wonder why we put ourselves through it!