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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Feeling very anxious about 9mo not trying to crawl - is it my fault?

33 replies

fionnthedog · 05/02/2015 12:59

I posted about a month ago about my worries that my DS who was then 8mo not being mobile in anyway and was very grateful for lots of reassurance. DS is now 9 months and still nothing and am beginning to feel very anxious about it again and that it's my fault for not putting him on his tummy enough or passing things to him too much.

He's been happily sitting unaided since 6.5m and otherwise I have no worries about his development (he babbles, waves goodbye, eats finger food well inc. peas/cheerios/blueberries, points) but he absolutely hates being on his tummy still. Always have.

I'm worrying that I've been lazy in not making him have tummy time and giving him the toys that he's reaching for. Could this be the case? If so how can I help / change things?

Also, did anyone's LO crawl from sitting rather than tummy time? If so when was this? Was it later than the norm?

I know I"m partly being irrational and over-anxious, but isn't that what MN is there to help with sometimes?

OP posts:

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nousernamesleft · 05/02/2015 13:02

My dd hated tummy time, and so very rarely did it. She was quite happy sat with a pile of.toys. She crawled at 10 months (about 3 days before her twin brother started walking!) and was cruising within a week.
Lots of babies never crawl, so I wouldn't be worried at this stage.

Gobbolinothewitchscat · 05/02/2015 13:04

I have a 12 month old DD who is not standing and only doing a bit of reverse shuffling. She doesnt pull up either. My 25 month old DS didn't crawl til about that age. He didn't walk til 20 months and just one day got up and walked. No holding on or wobbling! The next day he walked up a steep incline. I started to wonder of he had been practicing in his cot!

My DS is off the centiles for height and DD is 98th centile. My DH is 6 foot 6, never crawled and walked at 22 months. I've assured by health professionals that this is very common in tall children and, even if not very tall, they wouldn't worry until about 18 months.

Doesyour DS have otherwise good muscle tone? Ie can he kick well in the bath etc? No other concerns?

FWIW, I don't think that anyone in my DS's nct class was crawling at that age and only one small girl in DD's

Bumpsadaisie · 05/02/2015 13:11

Please relax. Neither of mine crawled till over 10 months and this was very normal. They hated tummy time so we never did it.

They are 5 and 3 now and can crawl if required.

TellmetogetonwithmyWork · 05/02/2015 13:11

DS1 walked at 9months
DS2 crawled at 11.5 months and walked at 15 months. DS2 had far more tummy time than DS1. But yes plenty of babies crawl from sitting.

Fwiw, DS2 is far more agile and sporty than DS1, it makes no difference when they crawled or walked.

Unless you had other concerns I would not in any way be worried about not crawling at 9 months.

Original poster

fionnthedog · 05/02/2015 13:15

Thanks both. I think part of what makes me anxious is that all the babies in my nct class are now crawling and most of them started between 6-7 months which I know is actually really early.

Gobbolino DS is actually small (9th centile) which sort of adds to my concern as smaller babies tend to move before bigger ones. But I think his muscle tone is ok - kicks in the bath and generally when lying on his back. He is able to weight bear when I hold him by the waist although doesn't always want to.

The thing that really niggles in my (baby) brain is that it's somehow my fault that he's not yet able to crawl.

OP posts:

Ihateparties · 05/02/2015 13:15

V small experience of 3- 2 of mine crawled, 1 didn't. I didn't do anything differently, it was just his natural development. The non crawling one came first and I definitely worried about it, by the time dd2 came along the elder two were 2 and 4 I had my fingers crossed she'd be another non crawler. She was mobile at 5 months and that was very very annoying.

dollyplumislotsoffun · 05/02/2015 13:17

Honestly, don't worry. My boy did nothing, not even roll, til 9 and s half, started walking at 10m!! He will just do it, nothing to do with what you do or don't do xx

flagnogbagnog · 05/02/2015 13:17

Please don't worry! None of my 4 DC's crawled until just before they walked. None of then liked tummy time, a consequence of sleeping on their backs I think. When they all eventually crawled it was from a sitting position first.
I remember being on holiday with my first DC desperately trying to get him to have a go at crawling at 8.5months and being a bit worried that there were no signs. Anyway he walked just before turning 10 months! So they really do come on ever so quickly over the next few months. But they are all different so don't compare your DC to anyone else because it just stresses you out

GiddyOnZackHunt · 05/02/2015 13:18

My dd never crawled. She hated tummy time. It wasn't a problem and she's perfectly fine.

Honsandrevels · 05/02/2015 13:21

9 months isn't late to crawl as some babies never crawl! Mine were almost 11 months and well over a year (I can't remember exactly!). Really, nothing to worry about at all.

Ihateparties · 05/02/2015 13:21

Fwiw it seemed to me every baby around ds was mobile at 6 or 7 months and every baby around dd2 sat happily still until 10m, neither was really the case but it definitely felt like it to me.

globetrotter141 · 05/02/2015 17:30

My ds didn't move till he was 10.5 months and then he started bum shuffling. I was quite worried and thought it was because I was crap at doing tummy time but he hated it! My dd didn't mind being on her tummy and has been crawling since she was 9 months. Don't feel it's down to you, all babies are so different!

CaroleService · 05/02/2015 18:03

Both mine bum shuffled, never crawled. I put it down to there being a wooden floor in the playroom - painful on the knees, but nice and smooth for sliding.

Misty9 · 05/02/2015 18:28

I've never bothered with tummy time (can't say I'm a fan of lying on my front either!) And ds crawled at 10.5 months, dd at 7...i didn't do anything differently that I'm aware of. Try not to worry, they all get there in their own time :)

GlowWine · 05/02/2015 19:01

I've posted this many times before: my now 10 year old never rolled over, despite plenty of tummy time etc. She also never crawled but perfected a speedy bum shuffle... which meant she always had her hands free to reach for things etc, so there was no need to get up. This she kept up to about 18 months. Then she finally started cruising and was walking within weeks. There was never anything wrong with her development and I must admit that I was never worried either. DD2 was more 'average' and crawled and walked by maybe one year (sorry hazy memory!) Try not to worry, your baby is still really young and never compare to others....

hanbee · 05/02/2015 19:02

Crawling is not generally used a milestone as many babies never crawl. I have 2 friends who didn't crawl, they were smart enough to get other people to fetch things for them. They both went on to excel academically so it certainly wasn't an indication of any problem for them.

Pengyquin · 05/02/2015 19:07

I have a 9month old. He's only just started sitting unaided (and still needs loads of cushions behind him)

I was concerned about his development - took him to see paed. Paed said average for sitting unaided is 9months and average for crawling etc is 11-12 months.

My little one is rolling everywhere and happy on his stomach but shows no interest whatsoever in crawling or pulling himself up. He won't even take his weight on his legs (for eg on my knee)

My friend's 9month old (exactly the same age by about 2 days!) has been sitting unaided since 5 months, standing since 3 months and been crawling since 7months. She also pulls herself up on furniture.

Paed said my little boy should stop hanging out with mensa babies

I'm not worried now. he'll do it when he's ready.

BaronessBomburst · 05/02/2015 19:09

DS never crawled. In fact, he never sat up either. And he never cruised. And hated being on his tummy.
He knelt. And then walked around on his knees. At 15 months he started standing, but would just stand still and then bump down again. Then, one day, he just started walking, perfectly balanced, perfectly controlled, and without ever falling over.
It's all normal, and all fine. Children are different and don't read the guide books!

docpeppa · 05/02/2015 19:13

My DD didn't crawl until 10 months and then she got up and walked at 11 months.

I wouldn't worry, although it's easy to say that I know

caledonianclown · 05/02/2015 19:25

My DS hated tummy time so we didn't do it, he crawled and walked on the same day at 11 months. I really wouldn't worry, he'll do it when he's ready!

toptomatoes · 05/02/2015 19:33

I have 3 DC, 2 of them started crawling at 10 months and the other at 11 months. All of them went forward from sitting rather than pushing up from their tummies.

CoodleMoodle · 06/02/2015 08:14

My DD is 11mo and not crawling. She hated tummy time for ages but now she'll tolerate it for a bit. She sort of shuffles backwards and can spin herself around, and has just started to get onto her knees. She's rolled from back to front about five times in her life, and only ever one way.

She can stand with help (loves being against the sofa!) but is still extremely wobbly, no signs of walking or even independent standing, really. She can get onto her feet pulling on the sofa if she's on your lap on the floor, but not if she's sitting on her own.

Don't worry OP, he'll get there in time!

BarbarianMum · 06/02/2015 09:53

Lots of babies never crawl, or at least not until they have learnt to walk. Some roll, some bum shuffle and some (like my ds1) just sit on their bums getting annoyed til they learn to pull up and walk.

Crawling is not a development milestone for this very reason. Stop worrying and enjoy your baby.

sashNmax · 06/02/2015 10:45

I never ever gave my baby tummy time because he would just scream. He started crawling around 10 months and it only started with an army crawl. Try putting something she loves a few feet away.

Bumpsadaisie · 06/02/2015 11:26

OP, unless you are very neglectful indeed and don't feed your son and don't engage with him/talk to him, then when he reaches his developmental milestones will be affected very little by what you do or don't do.

They do it in their own time.

It's actually nice when you realise that - YOU don't have to make it happen, the responsibility doesn't fall all on your shoulders. It just happens, as long as you provide the setting and the support and the care. But you don't have to actively teach your boy to crawl/walk/speak. Just be there for him and be loving and responsive. Some children do need help if they are developmentally delayed. But with most, it just happens and unfolds before you.

In the kindest possible way, you have got to get used to the fact that other kids may do things before your DS and that he can't major in all developmental areas at once! Otherwise, when he gets to nursery/school you will suffer terribly unless you can let go of the fact that his best friend is on a higher book band than him or can swim without armbands already! There will always be some kid who seems much better than yours at everything. So what.

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