Had the most horrid day yesterday, walked out of mother and toddler group in tears.

[waterfalls]

I take dts (2.10) to a M & T every week with no problems, but yesterday within 20 minutes I saw dt1 push another girl lightly, and as I was walking over to tell her off, I saw the mother of the other walking over too from the opposite direction, dt1 was sat in a toy car, and the mother mother swung the car round with force pointed at my dt and shouted DONT PUSH!!! I calmly but firmly said to this god awful woman that she leave me to disipline my own child, that it was not her place, I then opologised for the pushing.

Well it turned out she had the last laugh, when a while later dt1 hit a small boy in the face with a toy iron, she is never normally aggressive, I did'nt see it happen but another mother told me it was the twin wearing red, so I go to her and srart telling her off, when this mother shouts across the room, oh no sorry it was the other one, buy this time the whole place had stood to a standstill, I went straight over to the mother of the boy to opoligise to find the poor lad had a huge black lump on the side of his head, I felt awful and was close to tears, and as I am opologising someone shouts that dt1 is now attacking another child, I felt so humiliated, opologised, grabbed dts and fled, I still feel shitty now

Waterfalls, that's what toddlers do! It's the mother's reaction that I think is unnecessary.

You can be all smug at playgroup next week when no doubt her little angel wil play up.

That sounds awful, waterfalls. I'm wondering whether she did it twice more because of the way this lady pulled the car and shouted?

These guys see you and the dts every week. They know it was a one off. I'd keep going. We all have these moments where our little ones are far from perfect in public and when we do it seems like the whole world disapproves but I bet everyone was sitting there thinking god I feel for her, I've been there.

Thanks for all the advice, feel better today

waterfalls please don't worry - these are children.

My DS had a friend who often hit him or pushed, the mother always apologised and told her chld it was wrong and I saw that as adequate. My son is none the worse for it and I would never have considered telling the boy off myself.

These things happen. You apologised and that is the right thing to do. If you felt like crying it says a lot about the unsupportive nature of the toddler group than it does about your parenting.

Take heart and remember, it's them not you! !

I agree with most of the opinions on here - go back but don't bother with a prezzie! Their children will play up sometime soon - it happens to everyone.

And in the meantime all these mothers of singletons are so busy tutting and staring at the woman with twins they forgot to actually do something useful like engage one twin and play wiith them, so helping you out of a tricky situation.

Sounds about right. Sisterhood eh?

Don't worry waterfalls they have no idea. Don't let it bother you.

It can be a nightmare at M&T group. My DS is getting to the stage where he's realised he can express his annoyance about someone else having a toy (or whatever) by hitting, pushing etc. He also does it to the DD of a friend who we spend a lot of time with and he really likes. Of course I explain, stop him etc. but it's not as if it's going to sink in - it takes a long time for toddlers to learn empathy and any other mother should know that.

I have often missed M&T group for a week or two when that feeling of being judged gets too muuch...