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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

What age would you let a child play in the street unsupervised?

61 replies

NoRoomForALittleOne · 04/07/2014 08:04

And to settle a debate with DH what sort of road do you live on and where do you live in the country ie north/south.

We've lived at opposite ends of the country and are finding the attitude towards playing out in the street very different where we are now.

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Crocodileclip · 04/07/2014 08:09

I live in Northern Ireland in a modern estate of houses. All the kids seem to play out from around the age of 4 unsupervised. This is a slight problem for me as I have a DS 4 who I think is too young to be out unsupervised. The odd time I do let him out I watch him like a hawk from the window and he knows he isn't allowed out of sight but unfortunately the other kids don't have the same restrictions so he soon gets left behind.
We are going to be moving to a quiet cul de sac in the next month or so and I'm hoping it is more of a kids play in each others garden place as. I do feel sorry for my son.

tobysmum77 · 04/07/2014 08:10

its kind of impossible to say because it depends on the street.

We live on a tiny culdesac (like a big front garden). dd is 5 and plays outside semi-supervised. She is always where I can see her though and if I have a cuppa I will go and sit on a chair outside.

I reckon on our road 7.

tobysmum77 · 04/07/2014 08:12

midlands

Abra1d · 04/07/2014 08:14

Ours did, but it was a quiet village lane and we could watch them. I think it's lovely to see children playing outside, doing their stuff and getting on with it.

combust22 · 04/07/2014 08:15

I live in a quiet village with a large park 20 metres from my home. My kids were around 9 or 10 before I let them play out with friends. Although we always had lots happening in our garden so more often than not friends would come in to play there.

I was allowed to "play out" at 5 years old and I remember lots of awful things happening. Playing in the ashes of fires where asbestos panels had been dumped. Being asked to collect broken glass by older kids, visiting a local paedophile, being asked to touch the penis of an 18 year old. I shudder at how unsafe I was. Yet I just accepted it all as being part of the big world, and didn't even think to mention to my mother, who was happy to see me skip up the street in the company of som 8 year olds.

fruitpastille · 04/07/2014 08:17

Quiet cul de sac close with grassy area in the middle in the north. From 4 here but with 6 year old brother. I have the door open and check intermittently. They know to keep off the road.

BeatriceBean · 04/07/2014 08:19

Never. But then I didnt as a kid and find the whole idea of :playing in the street" odd. There are roads. Id encourage playing in each others gardens or going to a park. It's just the street thing I struggle with.

I also wouldnt like what children might get mixed up in in our area. Smoking, drinking presure by older chdren perhaps. When I moved here I was appalled that some people chucked kids out after school.

A good country park or beach or garden or little local park ive no problem with.

I do realise my experience may well put me kn the minority on mn!

ElizabethMedora · 04/07/2014 08:20

Depends on the street. Our old street in London, around 4. Our street now in the north-west, around 7.

donkir · 04/07/2014 08:21

I live in a cul de sac in the Cambridge area and my son wasn't allowed out until he was 8/9. We do have a big garden though so friends would come in here. I know my step sister (near Leeds) has a different view and her dd was out at age 4.

BeatriceBean · 04/07/2014 08:21

I think yhe situations above where parents are either out watching or watching through a window are quite different to random roaming with whichever other kids happen to be out.

BeatriceBean · 04/07/2014 08:23

Oh I'm south coast m/c. I think its often the kids that grew up on the estate who are chucked out at 5. Part class thing but also partly that they might well feeel safe/know other families on the estate perhaps?

combust22 · 04/07/2014 08:37

beatrice that's a good point. My kids only ever played out one or twice when they were younger. It is quite an education of life out there, even in "nice" places".
The kids that I would see regularly playing out at 5 or six are the same ones who, 10 years later are still "playing out" but now it's with fags and bottles of alcohol.
Street culture does toughen up kids, even younger ones. I am glad that my children preferred to visit friends houses or have them over where there was always some adult supervision.

DeWee · 04/07/2014 09:59

It depends on how unsupervised it is surely? Round the corner in the trees where can't be seen by any adults is different to the playing basically in everyone's front gardens.

I never played out as a child as dm didn't like it, and it did effect my ability to make friends. Because they'd come calling for me, but find dm expected us to stay in our house, which wasn't the way my friends worked. So eventually they stopped calling for me.

Ds has just turned 7yo and has just started being called for by a group of friends that are 7 and 8yo. I give him my old mobile and ask where they're going. I always remind him to stay with the others unless they do something silly like get in a car, in which case he's to get back to me asap.
They do go out of sight, but usually round the corner to play football, and it's unusual I can't hear them pretty continuously, even when they're playing spies and stalking people -a friend of mine told me they leapt out with "pop" guns (the ones with the cork in the end) and "arrested" him the other day. He thought it was very funny.

ILoveCoreyHaim · 04/07/2014 10:01

Mine played out from 3 in a cul de sac but with loads of other kids and various parents in and out, as they got older they can go further.

ILoveCoreyHaim · 04/07/2014 10:02

I played out myself from about 3 with friends. My kids as they got older are not allowed to go as far as i did as i got older. I wish they could i had some great adventures as a child

ILoveCoreyHaim · 04/07/2014 10:05

And im in Newcastle. Totally normal here

SooticaTheWitchesCat · 04/07/2014 10:11

We live in a busy London street and no children play out there at all.

BBQsAreSooooOverrated · 04/07/2014 10:15

My ds 8 and dd 11 play out on their own but they don't go off our housing estate yet. My ds 5 is allowed to play out on the green area outside the front of our house,as long as he's with my older ds or dd, it's not across any roads and I cN see them from the window (and hear them)!

5madthings · 04/07/2014 10:16

Depends where you live and on the child, we live in a quiet cul de sac so from age 5ish? But I can see them from my living room and kitchen Windows or I sit out in our front garden on the bench so bot totally unsupervised.

From 8/9 they can go to local shop or library or park, all within a few mins walk. For short periods of time and then building up independence ready for secondary school.

BeatriceBean · 04/07/2014 23:03

I was about to feel a bit judgy about sending a 3 year old out on the streets. One estate I lived on there were some preschoolers out and it really was awful. However you are saying there's adults out with them all the time -that's quite different!

ILoveCoreyHaim · 04/07/2014 23:19

Not today as its raining but yesterday in my street there were

3 10 yr olds in and out the street
a couple of 8 and 9ish neighbours kids
My almost 6 yr old and her 6 yr old and 5 yr old friend
2 4yr olds
2 3 yr olds.
1 2 yr old

its like that most days, sometimes more. Its a cul de sac with open plan gardens and usually adults sitting out. I dont anymore as my yougest can play in the lane without me sitting out now and flits in between mine and her 2 friends houses i can see from my window. 3 and 4 yr olds parents were sitting out. I used to clomp along my dms back alley when i was 3 or 4 with my friend in my mams high heels.

If i lived on a busy road i dout there would be kids playing out. I live in the same street i was brought up kn and its always been the same. Loads of kids playing out.

sittingatmydeskagain · 04/07/2014 23:29

South of england, fairly busy road in suburbs.

One side of the road is a large estate, lots of green areas, etc. Children play out from 5 years.

Other side of road is area wirh bigger houses, more traffic. No children play out at all.

ShoeWhore · 04/07/2014 23:29

Quiet road here. Not many children but my dcs and next door's run in and out of each other's gardens a lot when we're all home.

I've let the 10 and 8yo ride their bikes up and down since last year (so when 9 and 7) This summer they've been enjoying playing tennis on the road too.

306235388 · 04/07/2014 23:30

Ds is 7 and allowed to play out on the green opposite our house, has been since just before turning 7. We live in a housing estate, know most of our neighbours but there's a pond and a main road nearby.

306235388 · 04/07/2014 23:32

Forgot - in scotland

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