Using the naughty corner to punish for having wet pants

[SusieSusieSheep]

Does anyone else do this? It sounds incredibly harsh, but my 3 year old DD is very good at going to the toilet, but sometimes doesn't ask because she is busy doing something else and she will often say that she didn't ask to go to the toilet because she wanted to carry on playing and she seems to be aware that she's being a bit naughty, but does it anyone.

Please keep the flaming gentle.

Please don't do this. Just remind her that she should use the loo, and change her into dry clothes. If you make it punishable she may wet herself then be scared to tell you. It'll become 'a thing'. As with all toilet training keep it patient and caring, and it'll pay dividends in the long run.

I don't understand why you would punish her for wetting herself. It sounds counterproductive to make it an issue.

No no no! Please don't do that.

Perhaps better to reward the behaviour you want ie going to the toilet? And give as little attention as possible to any accidents.

The very most important thing is that they do wee and pooh - encouraging withholding through punishment runs the risk of some very serious problems further down the line that can have lifelong consequences.

So just let her learn that it takes more time away from playing to go upstairs, be wiped down and have a full change of clothes than it would to just nip upstairs for a quick wee and come back down to play again.

No, just no!

Don't put her on the naughty step/corner. Just leave her in her wet clothes a bit longer, she'll soon tire of being wet. And remind her, she maybe should have gone to the toilet. She'll get it. My dd went through this phase. We thought we were going backwards. I think it was nerves, as she'd just started nursery.

Although, I did get fed up with the washing.

Don't use the naughty step for potty training, you are giving a really negative message.

As pp's have said, show her that the natural consequence of deliberately having an accident are worse than going for a quick wee, so rather than having everything all ready and quickly sorting it for her, take her to trek around the house to get a change of clothes, cleaning equipment, get her to put the wet clothes in the wash, clean the floor etc etc.

At three she pick up that it's not worth it!

It's not "naughty" to have an accident. 3 yr olds get engrossed in what they are doing. I'm with the 'natural consequences' brigade, it takes much longer out of your game to go and get cleaned up and re- dressed than it does to have a quick wee on the potty Why make it a battle?

No.

No, never.

No. I have a dc who used to have accidents because he was too busy playing. Use a reward chart with stickers/sweets instead.

Forgetting to use the toilet when you are absorbed in something is a normal developmental stage.
So you are punishing your child for going through a normal developmental stage.

Its like putting a child in the naughty corner for dropping to the floor and crawling when they have just learned to walk.

Don't do it.

Don't be a dick. She's three years old, you weirdo. Of course she sometimes has wet pants. Do you punish her for being under five foot tall, too? How about for having small feet?

All of them are a natural part of being a toddler, why pick on bladder control when she can't help any of it?

Sorry no I don't and I haven't despite lots of toilet issues with a much older child, which drove me nuts, so I do understand how frustrating it can be.

bad idea

is this a mumsnet timewarp?

No. What you are doing is verging on abusive behaviour
Having accidents when toilet training is an important part of that process
Punishing her will be counter productive in the end as she could end up holding it in and causing her body all sorts of damage
She is also learning howyp get more attention in a negative way which is a very hard cycle to break
When she has accidents just deal with them calmly and don't tell her off
Make her do as much of the changing as you can
Give her gentle reminders that she should be using the toilet
Praise her when she gets it right. Give her a sticker chart
And remember those accidents are actually am important part of the process. She is learning how to control her muscles. It won't just happen . she needs to practice

Being able to use the toilet and being able to recognise the message that you need to go are very different.

You would do better by asking her to stop playing at regular intervals and then asking her to think about whether she needs to go. This will teach her to listen to the messages her body is giving her.

If she is normally reliable, then this is a case of encouraging the behaviour you do want (via natural consequences) so that not going is a greater interruption to her day than going. So she needs to remove wet clothes, put in proper laundry place, wipe herself down and redress.

Only if you think wetting/soiling in the wrong place is a deliberate act (and it can be, but typically in an older child) would a direct sanction be in order. But if that is happening it is highly unlikely to be an isolated behaviour and it might be worth seeking individual advice (start with HV) for a coordinated approach to all the issues.

Never. Not a good route to go down.

No. I have a 3yo who is easily distracted and if i don't spot that he's wriggling about, is likely to wee himself. I see it as my fault I didn't notice in time, toddlers don't have the bladder control that adults have and its not fair to expect them to.

No I think that is wrong and sad :(

I think the natural 'consequence' involved in having to stop playing, go to the toilet, change pants etc is enough to help her remember more next time.

Toilet training is frustrating at times. You need to accept this, not punish your dd as a way of venting.

It's hard for her too