Is it 'the thin end of the wedge' when 21 mo ds won't say 'please'?

[docket]

ds is 21 months and has started to be 'toddlerish', this seems to have worsened since the arrival of dd 5 weeks ago but was probably due in any case. he's actually very sweet with his sister which is lovely and i guess we are cutting him some extra slack to compensate for her arrival.

anyway, since his language is coming on apace we've been trying to teach him his p's and q's. he'll say 'chank chuu' no problem but will absolutely not say please. it's not that he can't, he just won't, so much so that he would rather not have a slice of his favourite banana cake than say 'cake please'. he just keeps saying 'no' very resolutely then lashing out when you try and get him to say it.

my inclination was not to bother about it too much, he will eventually say it i'm sure. however, my sister (a stickler for manners with two impeccably behaved children it must be said) reckons it's just the thin end of the wedge and that if i don't persist with getting him to say it now i'm in for all sorts of problems and further willfullness. do you agree?

tia

I'd try not to worry about it, my dd is the same age and has to be reminded to say please every time she asks for something, but almost always remembers thank you (or her versions of). Most of the time she gets them confused, but as long as she says one or the other I praise her.

Just keep saying them when talking to him and he'll catch on, he's just rebelling against something, doesn't matter what it is, just asserting his independence.

DD won't say sorry, very similar reaction to your ds, lashes out, pouts, point blank refuses to say it. They're just being toddler.

Some children are more wilfull than others... We had a similar situation and just kept on repeating please and thank you each time he wasking for something or we were giving him something. And nw he does.
If everything could be as simple....