HELP!!

[joanna1985]

this has probably been done to death so i am sorry if it has!

My 10 month old is the worst sleeper, he is a complete fidget and to make matters worse he is in the bed with us, i know i am a total idiot for starting that but i wouldnt listen when i was advised not to and wanted him in with me. Now he sleeps on my head and kicks and fusses all bloody night and i am not getting any sleep and neither is he.

i tried gradual withdrawl but as soon as he realised he was in his cot he went nuts, screaming and sobbing his heart out to the point of choking so i lifted him and he sobbed in his sleep. it was awful.

Does anyone have any books to reccomend or websites or ANYTHING at all. im pregnant aswell so i need to get him into his cot :(

anyone??

I guess you need I decide on a plan of action, gradual withdrawal might work with a little one?

We introduced a comforter for dd when she was 6 months old (a teddy elephant) and I expressed on to it up give it my scent, we gave it her for feeds then at night and now at 21 months she knows when she has Elle (imaginative name I know) it's sleep time, maybe something like this would help?

Also try looking on the Internet for the channel 4 programme that Tanya woman did a little while back, it had some really good ideas IMO - it's on our virgin Xl customer thing at the moment if you are a virgin customer?

Good luck!

My kids are all out of this phase now (thank goodness). With my youngest, I remember sitting and holding her hand through the cot rails (until she went to sleep) and then just sitting on the floor, and then sitting by the door. If just left, she would also cry until she threw up (not good! - tried only once or twice). It went on for a few weeks. It is very hard at that age, because if they are getting teeth as well, can make it harder to settle. I'm sure others with more recent experience will have better advice. Some people can cope with co-sleeping, I never could. My DS did co-sleep for maybe 4 months as he was breastfeeding every 1.5 hour in the night, and that nearly finished me off. Well done for 10 months!!

You have to decide whether you can tolerate it until he grows out of it, which might not be until he's at school or you have to teach him to sleep alone and all night which will probably involve a few nights of misery for both him and you. I opted for the latter at 17 months, sat by his cot for three miserable hours, but know he sleeps beautifully. Yours will sleep eventually, only you can decide when.

thanks guys, i def cant go on like this. Is it normal for them to get so upset even when your sitting right by the cot. i actually climbed into the cot with him and he fell asleep but when he woke up he got into such a state. what are you supposed to do if they start choking and stuff? i just lifted him, i felt awful. Didnt think it would have beemn so hard to listen to him in that state

This thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/sleep/a1394888-What-worked-for-us-Hope-this-helps

We co-slept from the start with DS1 because it was the right thing for us. Then around 11mo it was as you describe, him sleeping on my head, fidgeting, taking up the whole bed. None of us were getting sleep! So we got a cot and followed the steps in that thread. It's not an overnight solution, but it really resonated with how I wanted to treat my DS so the time investment was worth it.

By the way, I still feel like co-sleeping was the right decision. I never felt like I made a 'rod for my own back'. In those newborn stages you just want SLEEP and if co-sleeping gets you that then I think it's all the wiser rather than fruitlessly trying to get a tiny newborn to sleep in a cot. Then you just deal with it once they're a bit older. I think it makes sense. Doing the same thing now with DS2 (4 weeks old)

Gonna give it a real go next week. thanks everyone.