Very naughty 4 year old.

[Northerner]

It's my nephew. He's 5 this year and going through a very naughty phase. My sil is at her wits end and very upset. He will not do as he is told, throws things, hits, kicks and spits. Everyday is a battle. He is however good at school. I have no experience of this but SIL is tearing her hair out so I thoght I'd ask wise mumsnetters.

TIA

alos if he is being cared for elsewhere althe time he has no time to mong( a very scientific term!)

Ok, thanks guys.

I will suggest, a star chart, bed earlier (may be tricky as he likes to wait up to see his daddy)more one to one attention.

print this off then give it to her

Northener, my DS1 went through horrid naughty stage a while ago and thankfully seems to be coming out the otherside now (only for DS2 to be entering it by thats another story )

DS1 is also nearly 5 and at fulltime school. He would literally give his right arm to wait up for Daddy to get home but DH works different shifts everyday so the answer is always no. What we do to get around the problem is they write notes to each other. DS1 will leave one for Daddy to read when he get home or if DH is on earlies (sometimes starting at 4am) he'll leave a note for DS1 when he gets up. He loves this little arrangement......especially as DS2 doesn't get one(he's only 2.5 so reading and writing is beyond him). Maybe you SIL could try this too.
It does mean, of course, that he house is full of little scapes of paper within a week or so but hey-ho. DS1 loves to write and his handwriting is very good for a 4 yr old (well I think so anyway) and I'm sure this has helped.

I LOVE this idea

ds1 (5)is very into lists and notes at the mo too and I am always finding lists of turtles, people he loves, xmas wishes (yes really) all over theplace,

Coddy his favourite thing at the moment is "I love U" with the love being a big read heart. I think every teacher in school has one including his head mistress!!!! I can't wait to tell his girlfriend that when he's 18

He even wanted to write one for the bloke who put our double glazing in last year....bless him

Aw I LOVE the idea of note making - Megan cant write yet (aside from her name and individual letters and numbers) but I will definitely be using that idea - I have similar problem here in that she is upset not to see her [step]Daddy when he comes in fro mwork as he doesnt get home until 9pm

Maybe I should put forward as tip of the day......yes I think I will

That's a fab idea emma. I'm sure she'll love it.
Thanks

The note writing idea is brilliant. I am going to give it a go. My ds1 who is 5.5 also like to keep himself awake till dh gets home. Sometimes it's 8:00 which is just ok, but then he gets all excited and it takes a while to calm him down again. But sometimes dh is later and i just know ds1 isn't getting enough sleep on the days he manages to stay awake for him.

It'll also be great practice for his writing which needs some help, and he is a bit loathe to do "work" at home. So anything that turns it into a game must be a good idea.

dinosaur I try and get my two into bed for 7:30, they are then allowed to "read" books in bed until they fall asleep. For ds2 (2.5) this is usually about 10 minutes, and he wakes anywhere between 5:30 and 6:30. Ds2 goes to sleep around 8o to 8:30 and wakes at 7:00 (usually with alarm) on a school morning.

Becca - even if she can't write yet she could draw him a little picture with her name and some kisses on it.