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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Mums who have/had a 5 year old boy

27 replies

Eachpeachpearwherestheplum · 06/01/2013 11:21

Is this normal....because I am really, really struggling.
Since starting school in sep, DS has become quite hyper and very silly. His body never seems to be still anymore. He falls, runs, seems all over the place, I helped him get dressed this morning and whilst he was being like a jelly, making stupid sounds etc but accidently bashed me on the nose.....blood everywhere. To my horror, no sorry just a strop from him.
The back chat is horrible, he keeps saying silly things. I feel like I have lost him!
There are a few very challenging boys in his class who he seems to really like :( Is this the problem do you think? How on earth do I sort it out?? Please help!

OP posts:

TheSilveryTinsellyPussycat · 06/01/2013 16:12

I have just had my honorary grandkids over for Sunday lunch. The 5 year old DHGS is like this at the moment, he too started school in Sept. I imagine DS (now 24) was like this a bit (can't remember )- I think they all are. Not much help I'm afraid. But it will get better...

rebecca87 · 06/01/2013 16:17

Mine is - he's been silly and making silly noises and songs all the time since starting school. I think they'll calm down soon after the first year - I wouldn't worry too much about it

bryonywhisker · 06/01/2013 16:17

Yep, sounds completely normal for a reception school starter. Strops, back chat, tantrums like I had never seen the like of. Attitude, can't reason with them...
It had almost burned itself by then end of year one sorry!

fanoftheinvisibleman · 06/01/2013 16:17

I remember ds being pretty horrible at times through reception year. Backchat, strops when asked to do anything and pretending he couldn't do things. It does pass.

InNeedOfBrandy · 06/01/2013 16:18

Mine is 5 and is bonkers. He has no awareness and knocks into everything. Family call him Taz for a reason

SPBInDisguise · 06/01/2013 16:20

DS is nearly 6 and DH and I were laughing yesterday that even when he's asleep he's constantly moving - like the duracell bunny whose batteries are running down

bluebiscuit · 06/01/2013 16:22

I have a boy in y2 and a girl in reception. My ds did not behave like this in reception and his behaviour is by no means perfect. However, my dd comes home from reception complaining most days about how badly the boys have behaved (ranging from one hit another with a stool to just not being quiet). It's a bit more pronounced in her class because there are quite a few more boys than girls. I do think your ds behaviour is pretty normal, but I also think that you need to get tough with discipline and also explaining what he has done and why it is not acceptable.

Shybairns · 06/01/2013 16:25

Yes sounds very normal. And yes as others have already said it'll ease up by the end of summer term.

I think boys find the transtion to big school far more chalenging than girls. They are expected to conform alot more and there is the expectation of actually learning things which I think they feel.

Advice would be to let as much of it slide as you can. Home is where he gets to act silly and relax.
Having said that, back chat can become a habbit so do pick him up on that. Rudeness not ok.

doughnut44 · 06/01/2013 16:41

yep, my 5 year old has def changed since starting school

Lesbeadiva · 06/01/2013 16:42

Yep, DS Is almost 6 and he is just like this. Even when sick, he will not sit still. He has three activities a week and we walk miles every day and he still goes like the bloody clappers.

ReallyTired · 06/01/2013 16:43

That sounds normal. I think that school tires them out and affect their behaviour.

DisappointedHorse · 06/01/2013 16:49

My DS has just turned 6 and has turned from a lovely, chilled little ray of sunshine into Damian on speed.

Some of the backchat is unbelievable. He's not rude as such, just has an answer for everything and is relentless. He threatens to leave home, he is stubborn as buggery and amusingly melodramatic.

He is on the go constantly and leaps around pretending to be a superhero 24/7. it didn't happen at reception though, he waited for year one.

Em3978 · 06/01/2013 16:59

My DS is about to turn 5, started reception in september and is tasmanian devil too! He just doesn't stop/

Though at the moment he seems to be still, on a chair, but upside down

Tgger · 06/01/2013 18:14

Make sure he gets enough sleep and encourage moments of calm when you can. I wouldn't help him get dressed either. And I wouldn't put up with back chat if it is rude. Rude is rude is rude. Not allowed. Be straightforward but put some discipline in place so he doesn't do it.

lorisparkle · 06/01/2013 19:40

oh yeah I have one of those my inlaws call him the Ginger ninja! I actually have 2 as ds1 is now in year 2 and will join in the madness when given half a chance. saying that in fact I have 3. ds3 is 2 but likes to think he is ds2!

we bought the book calmer, easier, happier parenting and whilst it isn't a cure has some great suggestions.

Original poster

Eachpeachpearwherestheplum · 06/01/2013 20:25

Thank you so glad to not be alone!! His class has 21 boys and 9 girls......I am considering a move as I don't want him to have a tough class for 7 years.....not sure....

OP posts:

Glittertwins · 06/01/2013 20:30

We have noticed the attitude developing in DS since starting school too. We have told him to sit still until he calms down. DD on the other hand hasn't changed in that respect.

lagoonhaze · 06/01/2013 20:34

Oh thank goodness im not alone. Thank you so much for this thread!

lagoonhaze · 06/01/2013 20:35

Wow thats alot of boys in one class!

cupcake78 · 06/01/2013 20:40

Yep, we get sulks, tantrums. Ds is manic some days he just doesn't stop, he reminds me if a dog chasing its tail!

Silly songs, noises, back chat etc.

Nordicmom · 06/01/2013 20:52

I have an almost 8 y old DS and that sounds very familiar. To be honest at times I feel like he hasn't calmed down much and also now acts like a little teenager with an attitude to match ...
Now also have a 8 m DD and am wondering what she'll be like . She's already a very active baby !

tigersmummy · 08/01/2013 00:14

You could be describing my DS nearly 5 who also started reception in September. In class he struggles to listen, do as he's told first time and can't sit still during carpet time. He now has tokens for whenever he does manage to do as he's told or listen etc which is replicated at home with a reward chart. Maybe introduce something like that? DS never has computer unless he has earned it and then has limited time. He also is a devil at getting dressed; during Xmas holidays I have set a kitchen timer for ten mins and if he gets dressed before the bell goes off he gets a sticker towards the computer. Also doing it at bedtime for 2 stories instead of one. Time will tell though; we're back to school tomorrow, something he's not looking forward to and neither am I as he's been golden this Xmas. I think a lot of reception children are like this; it's a big adjustment and so tiring too. Remember, this to shall pass! As others have said, come down sharply on rudeness but with everything else, praise the good behaviour, ignore the bad (hugely difficult but works) and ride out the storm .

MmeLindor · 08/01/2013 00:17

Yup. Totally normal.

I recommend ensuring he's getting enough sleep and that he gets a rest after school then a good run around.

It's worse in winter when they are not out playing so long, IMO

DeWe · 08/01/2013 09:13

More boys than girls in a class doesn't mean badly behaved. Dd1's form had 10 girls 20 boys. They were lovely appart from one nasty girl. They never had behaviour problems-the sort of class that the teacher says "try and be a little quieter" at 9:30am and they're still whispering at home time because they wanted to please the teacher.

DD2's class at the same age was the opposite way round, 19 girls, 11 boys and was a problem from the start. Same teachers, same topics covered-just as a class there were several who were a little more "lively".

It comes down to personalities just as much as things like gender imbalances. You could move to a class with more girls than boys and find the behaviour is worse, so don't move because of that.

OneToThree · 08/01/2013 21:47

Exactly the same here. The silly talking and constant on the go really gets on my nerves. I try to just take a breath before I speak to him and decide if what I'm about to moan about is really worth it. If he answers me in a funny voice does it really matter? I felt like I was constantly moaning and being negative so now I try to pick my battles. A big one for me at the moment is if you hurt someone even by accident the first thing you should say is sorry.

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