Colic/excessive crying support thread

[Fishandjam]

Because I can't be the only one almost at breaking point - can I?

7week old DD is horrendously colicky. Screams or just cries for hours each day. Family life is totally down the toilet (DH and I already have DS2.5) and I'm exhausted and tearful. Nothing, but nothing, has any effect (tried Infacol, Dentinox, Coleif etc). Just wanted somewhere to vent and share horror stories!

No. I have been there. It is the most horrendous thing ever and people who have never experienced a colicky baby do not understand. My dd cried all day and evening. By 9pm she had completely exhausted herself so would sleep 9-2, 2.30-4.30, 5-6.30 and then the whole soul destroying scream-a-thon would start again. My DD had the horrible constipation causing green poops too. Trying to feed her was a nightmare because she would refuse milk. She dropped two centiles too. I would walk up and down the living room, sobbing, cradling her whilst she screamed. The only thing I can promise you is that it will not last and things will get better. We had nightmare first 3 months, a difficult next couple of months, but for the last few months (she is 1) things have just got better and better, and that 'i love being a mummy' feeling does come once the colic goes away.
Things we tried that helped:
Wearing her in a sling - the ethnic style ones opposed to the strappy ones.
Colief drops added to milk - you need to give it a week for the lactose that has been built up in baby's system to flush through. But, when it does their poo goes back to the consistency normally associated with a breastfed baby - yellow and loose.
Swaddling and then holding baby close and swishing from side to side (like they did on friends when Emma wouldnt stop crying).
Putting her down in her carrycot and leaving the room for two minutes when I just couldnt take anymore. Helped to calm me down so that I could regroup and try again.
It will get better, I promise xx

Forgot to add - baby massage helped her poop. Also, I do not know how true this is but one of the many HV's I consulted regarding dd's colic told me that the more a baby is held in the first 6 months of life, the more emotionally secure they grow up to be. I think wearing her in a sling really helped because the motion of me moving did seem to help soothe her. It does get better, I cant even begin to tell you just how much it gets better xx

Oh hug!!

I've been there. DD cried the house down for the first three months. I cracked a couple of times, started crying myself.

It does get better. She's now six months and NEVER cries.

Things that got me through:

My mum: I learnt to ask for help. When I was in a state, I could no longer calm the baby. Usually just half an hour away from LO would be enough to recharge.
The pram: My LO would sleep when I took her out.
Heat: A cherrystone cushion on the tummy calmed her down.
A tune: Sing to the baby, loud, louder, if you must. Don't let the screaming take you over.

My baby cried from the moment she woke up until she went to bed. It was clear she was in pain but I was continuously told by the doctor she had Colic. It was horrendous. I finally took her to a&e and phoned a dietician. Turns out she was allergic to her milk. After one day of dairy free milk and she was settled and happy. Keep asking questions of doctor if it continues.

Good luck. I know how difficult it can be.

Oh my god - we have tried everything for our little girl now eight weeks, she has had colic in the evening 5pm til 9.30pm since two weeks, screaming till tears fill her eyes and she can't breathe.
We believe we have FOUND THE CURE now, thank god!
I know this may not work for all babies but I have to share her story even so. We tried infacol, colief, gripe water, gaviscon, holding her in a wrap from midday till 5 or 6pm - that actually worked really well but was totally impractical. That idea came from someone saying that colic does not exist in developing countries where babies are held in a wrap all day. Reason for this is they can pass wind throughout the day easily and therefore it does not build up throughout the day into unbearable pain in the evening.
We believe our babies colic is caused by trapped wind because the screaming was accompanied by trumps followed by a very short break in the screaming and because being in the wrap all day was most successful (but impossible to have a life doing that!).
In an attempt to allow bottom wind to be passed more easily, I slept the baby on her front (against the recommendations) during the day when I can watch her either in the same room or via the video baby monitor to make sure she's ok. I combined this with using a product called 'windy pops', it helps with bottom wind and is a natural herbal remedy. The timing of the windypops in the milk seems to be important. I think it takes about two hours to start working, we give three drops in the milk, three times in 24 hours, at the 2am feed, 10am feed and 3pm feed. The product says its for children over 6months but apparently there has been a leaflet to say you can use it in younger babies. Just to say, doing just the belly sleeping or just the windypops doesn't seem to work, it is a combination of the two and we now have our life back! She is passing wind more easily while she sleeps and the windypops makes her poo softer (gaviscon hardens her poo but she wasn't constipated).
Also I should say she is having gaviscon in every feed, and infacol before every feed. The gaviscon is just a thickener which makes the milk thicker to prevent it being easily regurgitated- it stops her being sick as much and she is more settled having that. You can get it prescribed by your doctor.
I do realise some babies colic lasts the whole day and getting them to sleep is impossible so this idea wouldnt help but hopefully it might save one baby from the horrendous pain of trapped wind. Good luck you mums and dads, I think it is one of the most testing things you can face :>)

Forgot to say ear plugs are ESSENTIAL, they really help staying sane.
The only other things that help (most of the time) are going out in the pram and out in the car, avoid traffic lights! Stopping at the lights was not received well!
Cycling her legs and walking up and down the stairs have helped to get wind out too.
I wouldn't believe that there isn't a cure, the only thing that kept me going is trying different strategies and products to help it. I will not give up!

Glad I'm not suffering alone . I've found the sling to be the most effective anti-wailing device - we have a Kari-Me one which is ace, if a bit of a faff to tie. I've done housework, cooked, gone round town etc with DD in it (we used it for DS before her). She's not refluxy so no Gaviscon, and I don't have much faith in the simeticone remedies. She's pooing normally (mustard BF nappies) so Coleif a non-starter. But some days not even the sling works - like Friday, when (to my shame) I told DH I was going to ring Social Services because I just couldn't cope any more. (Had had really bad night too!)

Thankfully we've had a couple of good days and nights, so I'm feeling more chipper. I know there's only one cure for colic. TIME. As in, they grow out of it, and in the meantime you just have to weather the storm. But it's cold comfort when they're screaming and puce!

PS colic remedies came up on a podcast I often listen to - http://poddelusion.co.uk/blog/2012/07/26/episode-146-27th-july-2012/. It's about 11 minutes in, after the stuff about the Twitter joke trial. I like the way they define colic as "babies who won't shut the f* up".

poddelusion.co.uk/blog/2012/07/26/episode-146-27th-july-2012/ trying again with the link!

Glad things have been a bit better for you

We were there with our DD who is now 3 months old and seems to be a lot better. Infacol did work wonders for us though, I remember one day I forgot to give it to her and I certainly noticed the difference. The other thing that really helped was giving her a warm bath each night deep enough so that the water covered her belly and then afterwards gave her a clockwise tummy rub with some oil or lotion.

Things will get better with the crying. Just take each day as it comes.

When things got really bad I asked my mum if she would take her to live with her until I could cope better. My mum knew I didn't mean it and we laugh about it now, but at the time it was the worst time of my life xx

Would anyone consider lying their baby on their belly for daytime naps?
I fought my husband tooth and nail about trying it because he wasnt happy to because of the association with cot death and the 'back to sleep' campaign. Our baby would always be lifting up her legs in the cot trying to pass wind (and failing), but can do it no problem when her bum is sticking in the air lying on her belly.

newtobeingamum we've always put our DD on her tummy for naps and bedtime. Even though it is against recommendations , she would never settle on her back.

Plus I'll add that she farts like a trooper with her bum in the air!

Oh that's good, I'm glad other people do the belly sleeping, I am so sick of feeling bad about doing that when clearly the child is happier on its belly!
If it was up to me, I'd do that in the night too.
Roll on the weeks : )

Sympathies i had similar with mine, things that helped mine;

Cycling legs in evening
Hold feet together and move left and right singing 'row row row your boat''

Walk around tapping babies bum (also helps wind)
Walk around tapping back (burps)
Headphones or ear defenders!!!
Walk in buggy for naps
Get baby outside late afternoon 4/5 ish, just sat in his bouncer in garden, he went down much easier at night when he's had afternoon fresh air
Sometimes just change the activity. If baby screams, jist do something different (ie. put down, or pick up, or lay on tummy!)
Tummy time for wind
The colic hold (cradle in one arm with hands meshed together with babies head near your elbow), gets rid of gas and mine found it soothing
Sing a complex lullaby loudly
Walk, shhhh loudly & tap their back
Put baby down on their side in foetal position
Best of luck. This will pass :)

PS i gave up dairy (EBF) and mine (boy now 20 wks) now screams much less, still Screams when he needs to burp, but walking and tapping and sometimes just showing him my face&talking to him stops him mid hissyfit!

I am in your bell and sympathize

I am in your hell and sympathize. See i cant,even spell as sleep deprived!

I'll join you too. DS is 5 weeks old and this has only started in the last few evenings. Getting worse each night. Fortunately, he's a calm and settled baby in the day, so far.

Tonight he's been screaming for over three hours. Hasn't slept in that time and has barely fed (ebf). I offer feeds frequently but it seems to make him angrier, even when I think he's showing 'feed me' signals.

The things that work to calm him in the day don't seem to work in the evenings. I'm not hugely stressed about it so far, but DH is - I suppose it's the only time he feels he sees him. He hasn't woken his sister yet, thank goodness. And so far, once he's finally asleep at night, the night wakinga aren't too bad and he sleeps straight after a feed.

I do feel like it's wind related. He's calmed now and fallen asleep on me after a couple of burps 10 minutes ago. But why doesn't that happen in the day? He doesn't easily or always burp when winded. Have never heard him fart yet. Any good tips for burping?

belindarose our dd was very colicky and we found lying her face down across our lap and burping her that way helped a great deal

I find keeping DD upright after feeds helps with burping, and pushing her legs up to her tummy helps with farting! We also waggle her legs around while singing "DD Loves Mambo" (she goes to, she goes fro, she goes fast, she goes slow...)

We have also started with good old fashioned gripe water (tried everything else, and thought that for the sake of £2.50 it was worth a bash). It has coincided with two days of relatively less screaming! I'm reluctant to attribute causation just yet though