What can your 4/5 year old do?

[MamaMaiasaura]

I've a 4year 6 month old who has just been dx with autism. To me he is the same lovely boy. I've just received DLA forms and there is alot to fill in and a lot he doesn't/can't do and I just thought most children his age couldn't. Can your dc

1. Get undressed fully (tops as well)
2. Dress themselves
3. Be aware of dangers
4. Be safe by road
5. Cut up food
6. Feed themselves reliably with spoon and fork
7. Cope with changes to routine
8. Do you need to settle them in bed and for how long?
9. Do you help washing their hands

10. Do you wipe their bottoms 11. Can they wash themselves 12. Can they brush own teeth

Not got form to hand as dd sleeping on me, but would really appreciate knowing what most kids can do and if they can/can't do other stuff too.

DS is 4.6.

1. Get undressed fully (tops as well)

Yes, but often wants to be helped.

1. Dress themselves

Yes, but often wants to be helped.

1. Be aware of dangers

Yes, if anything he's a bit over-cautious.

1. Be safe by road

Yes, as much as a 4 year old can be. I trust him to run ahead and stop by the road, but he has to hold my hand to cross.

1. Cut up food

Yes, but often wants to be helped.

1. Feed themselves reliably with spoon and fork

Yes

1. Cope with changes to routine

Yes.

1. Do you need to settle them in bed and for how long?

Very rarely. He might do the "I'm thirsty/had a bad dream" thing but if I go back up and tell him to settle down he will.

1. Do you help washing their hands

No
10. Do you wipe their bottoms

Not usually.
11. Can they wash themselves

Yes, but often wants to be helped.

12. Can they brush own teeth Yes

Dd is 4.2

1. almost
2. almost
3. no
4. I have never tested it so would say no
5. no
6. yes
7. yes
8. no
9. no
10. yes
11. yes
12. yes

This is the tough thing isn't it, we are always told not every child does everything at tge same time. But a form is so yes or no, there is no room for almost

Ds is 4.2 and can do all of those things by himself, apart from 9, 10, 11 and 12 which I go over after to make sure it's done properly.

In regards to bedtime he gets himself into bed and I go and give him a kiss and a cuddle and leave him to it. He'll read a few books, go for a wee, turn his light out and go to sleep.

Sorry for your ds's diagnosis. I've just started looking into the GAPS diet for ds2 for his allergies but it's had amazing results with dc with autism so maybe worth a look for future reference.

At 4 my DS did all of the above, apart from wipe his bottom which he just didn't like doing. He's now 5.5 and does everything on the list.

Good luck with the forms Mama and hope it goes well.

The answers to your questions are all yes by 4YO. The bedtime routine used to take approximately 30 minutes each, and would involve cuddles and stories etc. If their hands or teeth weren't properly clean I'd send them back to wash/brush them again. DD was better at changes to routine than DS.

Mine did all those things at 4 but I check his teeth are clean. He didn't much like wiping his bum, but I made him try to do it so he was able when school started.

At bedtime I read him 3 stories, so about 15 mins in bed. Before that is bath teeth etc.

my dgs was 5 in September and can confidently do everything on the list except that I cant guarantee he is aware of all dangers and I wouldnt risk any under 7 by a road.

1. Get undressed fully (tops as well) YES

1. Dress themselves YES but needs to be old which item to put on next or gets distracted.

1. Be aware of dangers YES

1. Be safe by road YES

1. Cut up food NO

1. Feed themselves reliably with spoon and fork YES

1. Cope with changes to routine YES

1. Do you need to settle them in bed and for how long? NO read sing songs and leave. Always asleep in 10 mins.

1. Do you help washing their hands NO

10. Do you wipe their bottoms YES but I do think I need to address this one!

11. Can they wash themselves YES

12. Can they brush own teeth YES