Anybody had major eating probs with their one year old? I'm desperate..

[bakeacake]

I would really appreciate anyone's help with this one. I am trying hard to be chilled at mealtimes but still don't if I'm taking the right tack with DS or not...

He is 13 months and hasn't eaten a single meal for 2 weeks now. The best he has done in that time is 5 spoons of main course and a 100g yoghurt. Most meals are 2 tiny spoons worth. He has finished a course of AB's for a thraot and ear infection but is still not eating. He showed no other symptoms of being ill apart from the not eating.

I guess I'm starting to think this is a behaviour thing... Is that possible in a child so young? I say that because he is still happy to eat breadsticks and chases after us if we have a banana or apple. He will still only have a couple of bites I hasten to add. He is defo hungry as he then drinks lots of milk after a refused meal. I have tried giving him no milk in the day- makes no difference...he just refuses his meals and then needs huge volumes of milk to settle at night- 13oz!

Just wondered if anyone has experienced anything similar? Please!

I htink that at this age, we do expect them to eat an awful lot more than they really need.

If he has been ill, then it may take a wile to recover.

If you offer him a healthy meal at mealtimes, then that's all you can do. You can't force himt oteat.

But don't go down the chicken nugget road!!1

Does he eat with you?

And does he eat the same foods as you?

I think this can really change a child's eating habits.

Good luck; it is so frustrating when they do this.

My ds was 22 months old before he really started eating solids well. It was maddening! But, he was very healthy, active and gaining weight the whole time, so I tried to be patient, keep offering things and when it got right down to it, if all he would eat was applesauce or pureed squash, then that's what he got. Even at 2.6, there are some days where he seems to eat nothing but milk and crackers...

littlerach- I really hope he is just still recovering.

We do eat with him at breakfast and lunch times but this doesn't seem to entice him. If I have something different I let him have some but he is still only interested in one mouthful. He has only been eating un-pureed things since 11.5 months so would still not manage all our food yet or chicken nuggets. He used to projectile vomit on all lumps/ finger foods btw but since 11.5 months has been eating masses.

I know what you're saying about 1 year old's not needing so much food but DS is obviously hungry otherwise there is no way he could consume 26oz of milk a day ...that's my gripe really! What to do?!

DD who is now 16 months was a good eater until she reached one - then everything changed! One of the biggest issues wth her was self feeding, she decided that she was totally anti spoon for a few weeks. This was tricky at first to try and think of enough varied finger foods. If she refused everything then she just got brown bread and butter which she would nearly always eat. Mina pitta breads were also popular. She would still eat fruit as she could feed herself but she was and is only on 2 bottles of milk, before her nap and bedtime as we found that if she had milk first thing then she wouldn't eat any breakfast. Cheerios were good for breakfast as she could eat those dry herself. She then got an ear infection which evolved into a number of days vomiting followed by a number of days of diarrhea. Therefore I was following the "bran" diet, bananas, rice, dry toast/pittas and apple sauce for a few days to settle her stomach and I think she got so sick of the repetition and she was so relieved to be offered something different that she started eating foods from a spoon again. There are still good days and bad days though and veggies are still not very popular!
Some things we tried for self feeding:

• omelette
• ready made veggie fingers
• pasta
• garlic bread (she loves garlic!) Also she insists on having a spoon herself as well while you are feeding her and occasionally she even gets some food in her mouth! If you don't give her a spoon then she clamps her mouth shut. I know it is really frustrating and worrying but even when they eat very little they still seem to grow normally at this age. I suppose partly because supposedly they treble their birthweight in the first year but put on much less in the second - they actually need less food than we think. This type of behaviour is also the norm with all my friends children of around this age!

It's good to hear we're not alone Jabberwocky- it is maddening (amongst other things)! As I say, DS was slow to get the hang of solids as well. It's frustrating that he was doing well and now all he wants is milk. Can't be good for a baby this age .

Nonyummum- thanks for the finger food ideas. I will certainly try some of those. Most finger foods get thrown onto the floor after 2 bites though. I think if I got various snacks out every half hour throughout the day, he would probably eat quite a bit more but I just think why should I, really!! I offer him a mixture of finger foods and spoon fed stuff at each meal and I just can't be bothered to get more food out (to be refused probably).

Unfortunately, DS shows no interest in spoon feeding himself yet. He was on only 2 bottles a day but I have had to up it to 3 since 4 days into the food strike. I guess we will have to keep going with that for now.

what about watering the milk down so that it doesnt fill him up so much..does he drink a lot of milk when he wakes ? but doesnt want breakfast? so fills up with milk again then doesnt want dinner etc?

I'm sure milk is still the most important thing for him anyway and when I was getting really fed up one of my friends who is a HV said "don't stress too much, have you ever come across an eighteen year old who will only eat bread and butter plus bottles of milk! Of course that's easy for others to say and part of motherhood is the inevitable worrying bout these things but I'm sure in time he will get better. I don't know if you go eat to eat as a family but we also found that DD was far more likely to try new things in a cafe or restuarant than at home - though that probably says more about my cooking than anything else

Also forgot to ask - is he teething by any chance? DD often eats badly for a week or two when a tooth is coming but will usually still take milk. She makes up for it once the tooth is through until the next one starts. This was especially prolonged with the back teeth.

bambi- I haven't tried watering down the milk. He has 3oz on waking (that's all I put in the bottle). have since tried to go straight to giving breakfast...he was the same! He would down at least 6oz straight off if given it so giving him 3 was working well. He then refuses breakfast so I now give him another 5 or 6 oz. As I say, I have tried not doing that and lunchtime is no more successful even though he's obviously starving!

I don't think DS is teething but he does behave exactly like this when he is teething (but for 4 days max). I can't feel any imminent teeth coming through. I've thought about it being the molars (hence longer food strike) but he has only got 6 teeth so the molars will probably be a little while away yet.

Thanks for your suggestions everyone- keep them coming. I just wish I knew whether the reason was pain or just behaviour based...

wow what power they wield at that age!

stop in between meal snacks - a yoghurt , becuase he didnt eat anything for tea, a banana becuase ...well he must behungry.

if he was hungry he would eat - if this isn't the case its a medicalproblem - everything else is powerplay

Hi bakeacake, was just wondrering what your 'approach' is with him when you offer him food, have you tried (expect you have!) giving him his food without saying very much, then sitting with him but not focusing on him, iykwim. That way, you're still there to supervise him but he gets the vibe that whether he eats or not is really not an issue for you(even though it is!)

Also, have you tried only offering 1 food item at a time, like 1 tiny square of bread or 1 tiny slice of banana. That way you are removing the temptation to throw loads on the floor and the initiation to have more comes from him and not you!

Was also wondering over what sort of time period did you try cutting down on the amount of milk you offer him?

pinkandsparkly- trouble is he's still mainly being spoonfed as he isn't interested enough in finger foods (fine as a snack but not a meal iykwim).

I try and keep it as low key as poss...if not eating with him, I pretend I'm writing something on a scrap of paper or something! Some meals it really gets to me though so he must pick up on it. So hard to be consistent when he keeps up his food strike for 2 weeks...

Oh I only cut back the milk on one day- he had 5oz at breakfast, none all day, 2 bites of lunch and tea. The surprise, surprise he wouldn't settle to sleep without 13oz milk! Any ideas?

He had a bit of tea tonight so I am going to try to chill a bit- hmmm! I was worried about his weight but with all the milk he is drinking, I think he's maintaining it ok for now.

Is he bored? My 14 month old likes to have something to play with (often I give him a spoon and he tries to feed himself, otherwise a plastic wipeable toy). I think it's fair enough since I often read or watch TV when eating .

Gingernut, he finds eating the most boring thing ever and even on the best days, I have to resort to toys or interesting objects to keep his mind on the job!! These last 2 weeks we have tried nearly everything in the house. I swear he could be sat at a flightdeck in a plane and still not be distracted enough to eat. I dread to think what he will be like in few months time if he's like this at 13 months...

Sound like you are doing everything you possibly can aleady. Have you tried keeping a food diary? I would suggest you write down everything your ds eats for the next week/fortnight (boring I know). This may help you to get a proper idea of how his eating is progressing and seeing it all written down may help to reassure you.

What is your health visitor like? she may be worth having a chat with if you're still concerned in a day or so.

Keep up the good work, hope things improve soon.

another thought! was he off his food when he was on abs if so maybe his appetite dwindled and its just taking a while to gradually be able to eat more volume..think about when youve been ill . you cant eat as much as you used to but it gradually comes back.or simply that hes teething...have you checked inside his mouth to see if he has any signs of thrush from the ABs as that makes eating painful and they will go off theyre food but will drink milk,look for white patches inside his mouth..and does he have bad nappy rash that doesnt seem to go away with conventional creams?

pinkandsparkly- may do the diary but it may depress me more to see it written down. My HV not great, she does listen but not that experienced I don't think (made me feel like a failure when he was 8 months and couldn't eat lumps/ finger foods without proj. vomiting).

bambi- he'd been off food for 7 days before AB course and has been same throughout the course and since finishing them. I asked dr to check mouth for infection and thrush and no sign. No teeth coming through, have checked whole mouth now . No nappy rash.

I am so grateful for all your posts. Feeling really upset this morning. Seems a waste of time even heating up food from the freezer most of the time but I have to keep offering it to him.

Going to get him weighed tomorrow. BUT can't decide whether to starve him of all milk until he eats or just keep offering meals, no pressure, and letting him fill up on milk. Please vote!!

pinkandsparkly- may do the diary but it may depress me more to see it written down. My HV not great, she does listen but not that experienced I don't think (made me feel like a failure when he was 8 months and couldn't eat lumps/ finger foods without proj. vomiting).

bambi- he'd been off food for 7 days before AB course and has been same throughout the course and since finishing them. I asked dr to check mouth for infection and thrush and no sign. No teeth coming through, have checked whole mouth now . No nappy rash.

I am so grateful for all your posts. Feeling really upset this morning. Seems a waste of time even heating up food from the freezer most of the time but I have to keep offering it to him.

Going to get him weighed tomorrow. BUT can't decide whether to starve him of all milk until he eats or just keep offering meals, no pressure, and letting him fill up on milk. Please vote!!

A bit of a bizarre thing happened at lunchtime- gave him a bit of apple while I got things ready. He put it in his mouth and I thought he'd eaten it.

He then refused to be spoonfed any main course and had lost interest in the apple.

I then got a yoghurt out. He opened his mouth when he saw it was yoghurt but still had all the apple, unchewed in his mouth (it had been there at least 10 mins)!!! He then only ate 5 spoons of yoghurt. Now I'm back to thinking something in his mouth isn't right. Any thoughts?

curiouser and curioser! it does sound like he has something in his mouth[or throat ]maybe thats stopping him from wanting to eat anything..especially as he likes soft things like yog and milk..perhaps take him back to the drs to have a look and ask him to look in the throat..he couldnt have picked something up and its got stuck in his mouth which is causing him pain on eating or it could just be those damn teeth ..id go with checking him just to be on the safe side and write down exactly what hes eaten volume wise regarding his intake so you can show him this..did he eat prior to his infection ?

yes bambi it is just plain odd tbh! Yes he did eat prior to the infection. He gets bored at the table but obviously enjoys his food when he does eat. I will write down what he's had over the weekend and take him to dr's tomorrow.

I feel like an awful mother though as I just have no energy to feed him anymore. Have not bothered offering snacks either. DH has just done tea with him- 3 spoons! His cheeks are very red. Teething could very well be in the equation now but not for 2 weeks almost certainly!

Anyone know Dr Tanya's no? I could have her youngest patient yet?!

Hi Bakeacake

Sorry to hear things are still tough. If it was the back teeth 2 weeks is nothing for those babies - it felt like dd was cutting them for 3 months! I know you said he only has 6 teeth but I'm not sure if they all come in the same rotation. I know DD got 8 front ones first but then she cut 4 back teeth more or less together. Has he started holding the bottle teat any differently in his mouth recently?

Thanks Nonyummymummy, I can't feel any teeth coming through (but it's a definite possibility). He is drinking the same as he normally does.

Thinking about it, he's been more whingy in his highchair in recent days whereas last week he was refusing food with a cheeky grin .

I shall see what the professionals say tomorrow and post an update for anyone interested in this mini-saga!

Haven't read the whole thread, but there is a bug going round which knocks appetites out

My two stopped eating for about 2/3 wks. DD was grumpy/tired as well; DS, 1 yr, seemed otherwise fine

I thought it was all sorts of behavioural issues and got very uptight... now they're both monstering through the fridge