Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Flip

1 2

Original poster

Re-settling in the night

31 replies

Annie456 · 27/01/2012 04:02

DS is almost 5 months and over 18lbs and I have his daytime naps down to a fine art and bedtime isnt too bad...but the night wakings are becoming a problem and I could do with some advice on re-settling.

I give DS a final feed at about 10.30 when I go to bed and he usually wakes up again between 2-3am. I try to settle him without feeding by holding his hands and more recently, giving him a dummy. I don't feel that he needs to feed at this time as he's a good feeder in the day and us just in a pattern of getting food every 4 hours. So I keep resettling until 4-5am where I do feed him with the long term goal of moving this feed later and later until he's doing 11-7 (yeah right!)

Am I completely barking up the wrong tree here? We're due to begin weaning in a couple of weeks and then I guess he'll move to his own room so I'm sure that will change everything but for now I really feel like I need to break the 3am feed habit...
Any ideas much appreciated!!!

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

StickyGhost · 27/01/2012 04:55

Hello Annie .
I have a similar problem with my DS at the moment, he's only 3 months though, he's awake at about 4am every night and not really hungry. I moved his dream feed to 12am to see if it will help, but no. I've decided to try and tackle it tonight by putting him onto his tummy when he stirs as he sleeps brilliantly like that. Except that now I can't sleep as don't want to leave him like that. Sorry I don't really have a helpful answer for you, HV suggested to me to 'shake-up his routine' so he goes to bed a half hour later or something. You could try moving his dream feed? I'm going to rig-up some folded towels tomorrow night so he can sleep on his side. Hopefully something will break the cycle.
Anyway, good luck, hope someone will come along and give us more advice soon!

mrsalwaysawake · 27/01/2012 10:47

Maybe he's in a pattern of feeding every 4 hours cos that's how often he gets hungry, and maybe you should just feed him when he's hungry?
Sorry if that sounds snotty, isn't meant to! My ds is 6mo(today!) and still feeds twice every night.

PriscillaQueenOfTheDesert · 27/01/2012 11:08

It's very normal for a 5month old to still feed at least once a night so if that's what he wants then just give him a feed.

Surely that's easiest for everyone rather than trying to settle him for hours?

He'll slowly drop the feed when he's ready so just go with the flow for now. He's still so little.

BlastOff · 27/01/2012 11:32

Afraid I'm with the 'he still needs to feed' gang. He's only little still, and they quite often still need a feed at this age - and it will change and it will get better. I actually think he sounds like he's doing really well. I've had sleeping babies and non-sleeping babies (and currently up multiple times a night with 8 month old). They sort themselves put when they're ready. Huge sympathies in the meantime though - it's exhausting, isn't it.

NurseSunshine · 27/01/2012 13:46

He is VERY young to go so long without feeding. They tend to have a growth spurt around 6ish months as well so he'll need the extra energy.

Skodafabulous · 27/01/2012 14:05

Normal to feed in the night at that age.That sounds quite good compared to my 2 at that age.I found it was hard work at night up until about 8 months, then they both slept all night from 8-8.I'd just feed him for now.He won't get into bad habits, he's still very little, and there is light at the end of the tunnel for you,just wait a few more weeks

tootiredtothinkofanickname · 27/01/2012 14:18

I also think he can't go for so long without a feed. I know babies who do, but all of them seem to do it of their own accord, they just slept through at a young age. Not DS though... he is almost 1 and still feeds once in the night (hence my nickname, or lack of it). 5 months is really, really young, so I would just feed him. It maybe is just habit, but what if he is genuinely hungry? They go through so many growth spurts at this age anyway. DS had one last week, he wakes up for a feed between 3 and 4am, but one night he woke up at 12am and was ravenous, he drank 7oz in a couple of minutes! Sympathies for the lack of sleep though, it's awful...

TheSpreadingChestnutTree · 27/01/2012 14:24

My advice would be to feed him when he wakes, then you can both go back to sleep. Much easier for you both

Original poster

Annie456 · 27/01/2012 17:03

Wow, that seems pretty conclusive! It just goes to show that reading books doesn't get you anywhere other than tired and feeling like you're failing. The books tell me he should be more than capable of going 8hrs without a feed but I guess not. I think I'll try giving the 7 and 11pm feeds from a bottle (expressed) so I know how much he has before he falls asleep-it might just be that he's falling asleep before he's had a proper feed. It would definitely be easier to feed him in the night rather than fighting it and ending up knackared!!!

Thanks for all your advice, very helpful.

OP posts:

er1507 · 27/01/2012 19:24

my dd is 6mo and still wakes for a night feeds! have u tried feeding him when he wakes the first time and seeing how long he goes then? He might go until 6/6.30 ish

MigGril · 27/01/2012 20:19

I would be warry of giving both those feed's in a bottle. Going to long between feeds espically at night can caurse problems with your milk supply.

Just try the 11pm feed with a bottle.

happyrf · 27/01/2012 22:54

Sorry to be antagonistic but I do 7pm and dream feed from a bottle, I have a 'starter' of a boob at five to get him through bath time and then express at 10pm and my supply has been fine, I have done this or three months now and did it for five with my first ds, I think with sensible expressing bottle feeing is fine and has kept me sane.

Original poster

Annie456 · 28/01/2012 04:37

No worries re milk supply, at various points since DS was born I've had to exclusively express because of breastfeeding problems so I just pumped right before I would give the feed with a bottle. In the night I continued to breastfeed as normal. It was a total PITA but it was the only way I could give him breastmilk.

I decided to go back to feeding on demand tonight and he went until 4am anyway! Typical!

OP posts:

RealLifeIsForWimps · 28/01/2012 04:49

I think if you're having to resettle him every night, then he probably does still need feeding.

My HV suggested I try to knock the night feeds on the head when DS was 6mo (used to wake at 3am), and basically, after 2 nights he stopped waking up, so I could tell it was basically habit. She did say if he kept waking up after a week, then he was hungry and to leave it a while.

MigGril · 28/01/2012 08:21

happyrf - That's great that you are expressing at 10pm to keep up your supply. Some women though would give a bottle and express at another time and this is when going so long between feeds would cause a supply issue. Say you give the late bottle's but are epxressing in the morning for these feeds.

Sorry I maybe should have been more specific. It's great that you can express as well not everyone can.

bishboschone · 28/01/2012 17:15

My ds is 7 months but born at33 weeks so really 5 months . He has slept for 12 hours straight since about 3 months . It isn't luck I trained him . In my opinion it is habit . My ds was around 10 lbs when he slept through . He is a very fussy difficult baby with reflux so def no luck involved . I basically kept reducing the amount of milk consumed at 4 am then swapped it for water then just didn't bother . It has the effect of them drinking more in the day and going for longer in the night .

mrswishywashy · 28/01/2012 17:35

I would drop the dream feed and see how long he sleeps. I'm a maternity nurse and since I started recommending not doing dream feed I've had babies sleep through much easier than staying up to do dream feed. It may mean for a few weeks there is two wakings between 10pm and 7am but it doesn't last long and then its just one feed which at the moment you're already getting up for, plus not doing the dream feed means you can go to bed early.

happyrf · 28/01/2012 20:41

Thank you wishy washy, thats really interesting, my 10 week old wakes at exactly the same time twice a night, I think I will wait until I know he has eaten tonnes in the day and isn't growth spurting and then drop the dream feed, my nights can't get that much more difficult. My ds1 slept though at three months and this wee lad is still waking twice, bloody hell.....

cobwebthegrey · 28/01/2012 20:48

The books will tell you all sorts of tosh, but its evident that your son has other ideas, I'd say feed him and you'll both get back to sleep more quickly. I've only just cut out the night feeds at nearly 2 with my second dc, who I swear never read those damn books! :o

Original poster

Annie456 · 29/01/2012 08:12

I did try dropping the dream feed but selfishly picked it up again because I just found it so hard to be woken up between 12-1am. Also I think the dream feed is also easier at the moment because he's still in our room and usually wakes up when we come to bed. I'm planning on moving him to his own room soon so perhaps that's the time to drop the dream feed when he won't respond to us coming into the room? And yes...I really could do with going to bed earlier!

OP posts:

hubbahubster · 29/01/2012 10:24

I'd also say don't be too rigid about when to start weaning. Your DS will show when he's ready - mine actually snatched food from me after watching me like a hawk and smacking his lips when I was eating! If your LO is doing something similar then it may be worth trying him with a little baby porridge and see how he responds. My DS naturally started to drop a few milk feeds once he started eating.

trixie123 · 29/01/2012 21:28

god they're all so different aren't they? DS slept through from 3 months and we never imagined we'd (and by that I mean I) would be still getting up for our nearly 9m DD. I am back at work doing at least one wake up (only ever one feed though) and am knackered! She chuggs back the bottle so I think she is hungry but we can't get any more into her during the day, if we try she just pukes. OP, I think the thing is if you think she is really hungry or not. If so, you'll just have to go with it, if its habit you can try and break it - main thing is to not feel like there is anything she SHOULD be doing.

bt1978 · 29/01/2012 22:27

I'm with washy - try dropping the dream feed again.
Did this with DS (4mo) as I realised he was waking for his dream feed out of habit and not out of hunger when I managed to resettle him one night and he didn't wake again until 2am, when I fed him.
I find if I leave him to wake when hungry he will go until 2/3am and then back down until 6/7am - and I find this easier than trying NOT to feed him after the dream feed and having a really unsettle night when I am up and down loads rather than just once for a feed.
For us it has taken a week or so for him to stop stirring around 10pm (which was dreamfeed time) - last night was the first night he didn't wake at all for a feed in the night...

happyrf · 30/01/2012 22:15

Bt, am very jealous, was planning not to dream feed tonight and the monkey woke up anyway, oh well, it can't last forever.

conorsrockers · 30/01/2012 22:25

Growth spurt? :)

Flip

1 2