After someone's comment to me, please reassure me about late walking

[bigyellowsun]

Hi

I'm new here. My DS is nearly 14 months and not walking. He's not pulling up either. The HV isn't worried as he's weight bearing and can stand for some time, but obviously as a first time mum I'd love him to start walking though I accept he'll do it in his own time. he's very lovely and alert and contented which is the main thing.

To put things and myself in context, I have had, and am still experiencing PND anxiety. In the park yesterday someone asked me about him - a stranger - and then made a comment about a friend of hers whose two sons were late walkers and they've been recently diagnosed on the autistic spectrum. She said she hadn't realised but there was some connection, sometimes, especially with aspergers.

It was all vague and glib but it stayed with me. Is this right? Or are some babies just late walkers? Or am I now going to worry that there's other reasons looming in the future?

Hence, I try not to google at times like this because I did during pregnancy and found google was my enemy

I think they usually take a look if babies aren't pulling up by 12 months (DS wasn't and was referred) , but that is purely precautionary as a few babies (very few) do have muscle atrophy so they cant bear weight. But that's rare, and clearly not the case here so please don't worry.

Can I ask if he's a bum shuffler? Only reason I ask is that DS was and the physio said that bum shufflers sometimes have problems with transitional movements (eg DS could sit up at 5 months, but could only get from lying to sitting at 10mo) and so can't figure out how to pull up. If you walk them through the movement a few times (showing them how to get onto one knee and then the other, it clicks.

Reallife - my DD didn't pull up until 13.5 months. She's doing in constantly now though, and cruising (14 months today) so I assume that's ok?? Am a bit paranoid about muscle diseases.

Olivetti,it sounds as though your dd is doing fine if she is pulling up and cruising. Ds had a test for spinal muscular atrophy (which was clear), but he wasn't even sitting by a year and had significant head lag. He is now 18 months and has just started cruising, but is unable to pull himself up due to his low muscle tone (which is under investigation). He is also delayed in other areas, speech etc. If there were a problem with the muscles I think it would have displayed it in other ways.

My friends DS didn't walk until 18 months he comes 1st in the sports day sprint every year

I know what worry is like - and it isn't restricted to first borns either cos it's a perfectly normal caring mummy reaction. Some babies just haven't read the textbook. So don't worry and enjoy the things he is good at.

best wishes
From the mum willing her 14 month old ds to take his first steps unaided; he too has been weight bearing since 6 months

(there's more than a few of us out there!)

Not read all the replies but my ds didn't walk till he was 18 months. He's 3.8 now and I've no idea if he has any autistic traits etc but he seems normal enough to me. On fact I know loads of mums with late walkers.

DD didn't bother to walk until she was nearly 18 months, and she went straight into proper walking/running, bypassing the unsteady toddling/falling over stage altogether. However, DS also didn't start walking until he was 18 months also and more than a year later he is still tottering along unsteadily. He'll sort himself out eventually!

I was chatting to another mum who is also a GP a while back and she said that 18 months is around the time she would expect most children to be walking, but she didn't seem too concerned if it took longer than that.

My DS didn't walk until he was 16 months and I had, of course, convinced myself that there was something terribly wrong with him! He just wasn't interested in walking (wasn't much into crawling either) and was much more focussed on talking. This pattern has pretty much continued and at 3.5 yo he is not at all interested in scooters etc but desperately wants to learn to read!
My point is, I think, that everyone has their strengths.

is 14 months late? Dont think so yet - sounds a daft question but is he quite a large baby with chunky thighs. We had a kid in our baby group who didnt walk until 18 months - 1. he couldnt be bothered, 2. he had chubby legs. Once he decided he wanted to do it and his baby fat suddenly started to reduce he was off and about.
My nephew is autistic, he was walking at 7 months, riding his first bike without stablisers at 2 1/2 years so I am pretty sure late walking is not a sign of any mental issues.

Well 13 months is average, so 14 months is later than average, but not "late" as in "you should be concerned" late. That's where many people get confused about averages. If 13mo is average then c.50% of children will not be walking at 13 mo (i know that's a bit simplistic, but it's approx right)

Olivetti Yeah- absolutely fine. Didn't mean to freak anyone out. As I said, the muscle atrophy thing is super rare. The vast maj of children who aren't pulling up by 12 mo arent doing it just because they're not ready to/don't want to. Only a tiny minority will have physical reasons why they cant.

DM tells me that I didn't walk until 16m, just bum-shuffled. I didn't crawl much, either. She'd taken me to the doctors, but nothing seemed to be wrong. Then one day I wanted a toy that was out of reach, pulled myself to my feet via the sofa and toddled off to fetch it, perfectly OK! Some kids just don't seem to see the point! It made no difference to my future development, and I was a very active kid after that.

For comparison, DB (4yrs younger) walked at 10m. 12m may be the average, but averages are mathematical constructs - they are in the middle of what is OK, not a golden standard you have to hit.

It's like talking. I was talking at 9m, DB not until 15m. Both perfectly fine, and he now makes his living with words (advertising).

I would say though that if you really are worried you could get a referral to a specialist.

DD took first steps at 16m, felt like forever till she walked. She is super-smart, scarily so, and I'm told that walking late is indication of brain processes working efficiently (or something like that I didn't grasp properly as probably I walked early).

Einstein's first steps were at 18m

All the same, I would suggest you direct your questions to a qualified health professional who you trust and afford less importance to thoughtless comments by strangers. It can really hurt when you're feeling vulnerable and there is no need, you can probably have your fears alleviated promptly by the right person.

I really don't think 14 months is late. DS started making tentative steps at about 14 months but wasn't really walking properly until at least 15 months. Lots of my friend's kids were similar (there was one though who was walking at 8 months which I think is super early!). One friend's daughter is nearly 18 months and not walking yet and I don't think she's too concerned (or hasn't mentioned her concerns anyway).

I haven't heard of any connection between late walking and Asperger's. I think that what that stranger said was actually pretty rude and thoughtless and why did they even feel the need to say it in the first place?

If you are worried pop in and see your health visitor maybe (depending if you've got a good one or not!), or the GP and i'm sure they will put your mind at rest.

My DS didn't walk until 19 months, but knew all of his letters before 2.5 and was reading words by 3. He is now at school and fine - still very able in lots of ways and exceptionally good at reading. He was also late to potty train aand is still not dry at night, so I wonder whether he just concentrated on other skills more as a priority than physical ones? My DD was 14.5 months which seemed early in comparison, but I remember the pressure as everyone kept going on about how girls are more forward etc (not true here at all - 2 very different children with different skills).
I used to get a bit worried about his walking and other physical skills which were late but now I realise that people with later walkers have the advantage that their babies have just a teensy bit more sense when they start walking. A lady at my baby group had a baby girl who walked at 9 months and she was chasing her around all over the place while I enjoyed my cuppa and DS played happily on a blanket with his toys (had started sitting up then).

PS. I noticed that both of mine started walking about 5-6 months after they crawled, but some children crawl for ages and some move through the stages at different rates. I think it can also depend on the size of your house, how many older siblings etc.

The brightest child in my dd's class didn't walk until 17-18 months old. There's plenty of time yet.

DD1 didn't walk till 17.5 months. She only crawled from about a month before that. She first rolled at 10 months. You wouldn't have any clue from watching her now.

Imaginethat I am loving the story of your DD and the intelligence explanation for late walking. That explains why my nearly 15mo DD is still happily cruising the furniture and showing no signs of wanting to do more. Interestingly, my DM tells me that her terrible picky eating is also a sign of intelligence (to do with some kind of inbuilt wariness of poison apparently) and what is more, the very late appearance of her teeth (she has two) is a great sign, as it means they will be strong and durable.

So there you go OP! Apparently it's all good.

Really though, I think it is too early to worry OP. I am honestly not concerned about my DD either - I feel she's getting there very well, at her own pace. Just keep an eye on it. If things haven't moved foward in some way in the next few months, maybe consider mentioning it to your doc.

My first daughter walked at 16 mths, my second daughter at 14mths & my son walked at 11mths.

14mths is by no means late! Also remember by the time he does walk he'll have a bit of sense! Much, much easier believe me

SomethingSuitablyWitty - what's more, my nephew walked at 6 months and now, at 23, he is a couch potato. I am happy with this as sum total of evidence. Your DD sounds very smart.

Hi bigyellowsun,

My little boy didn't walk or talk til 16 months. Prior to that he didn't crawl until 11 months.

Now he is a real chatterbox and tear away!

Many mums worry about development, me included. It's a shame, I regret the worry now. I should have just been enjoying my son! Oh well, guess we just can't help it!

Hope you manage to stop worrying soon as chances are everything is absolutely fine! :)