Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Flip

1 2

Original poster

The bigger the better

35 replies

Jenie · 26/09/2003 13:41

Is it normal for my ds to be interested in womens breasts? None of the other boys or girls his age seem to have such a fasination with them, if a lady has lets say an ample bust size and she makes the mistake of picking him up he buries his head in them.

I myself am not well endowed in the bust department so he seems to ignore mine but my mother has been genorously provided for (pah genetics) and he is forever burying his head inbetween them or grabbing at them or just resting his head on them! This applies to other women too but only those with a reasonable sized bust.

He saw a mother breastfeeding her son (aged about 2) and decided that the boy had clearly had enough and tried to pull him off and well have his turn - this was at mother and toddler group and I am soooo embaressed I don't think I can go back again.

So does anyone have any advice - ds is now 17 months so he won't get away with this for much longer, but I don't know how to stop it.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

pidge · 26/09/2003 13:52

Very entertained at the thought of your ds trying to help himself to a breastfeed from another mum. I can understand you being embarrassed, but I bet she didn't mind at all. If I was her I'd have been very amused, and maybe even flattered! I even know someone who did breastfeed another woman's baby - though I think they were a bit younger than your ds!

I would try not to worry about it - he's probably just after some nice cuddles. And who can blame him - ample bosoms are pretty cuddly! And before you get too jealous of bigger busts - believe me they can be a darned nuisance. Always in the way when trying to do any sport, and harder to get nice bras to fit. I'd like mine a bit smaller, but no chance of that whilst bfeeding I guess.

Blu · 26/09/2003 14:15

I am currently breathing a sigh of relief because I have now managed to explain to my DS, 2.2 that he mustn't twiddle people's nipples! He always tries to sink himself into any breasts he finds himself up against, and when he's tired, he puts his hands down my shirt and feels my nipples...and has given a number of friends and family the same treatment (oh, horrible thought...what if he's learned by observing his Dad...)

Original poster

Jenie · 26/09/2003 16:46

So glad to know that my ds has every hope of growing out of his fasination with womens breasts.

Blu did you find it embarassing when he did it to other people? My concern also lies in he had no interest in mine and only women who are as I said well endowed, if they haven't got much up top then he isn't interested!

Pidge - The other mother didn't seem very flattered but as she doesn't speak much english then I couldn't understand what she was muttering. Probobly something about westerners not breastfeeding for long enough.....

OP posts:

SoupDragon · 26/09/2003 17:03

Jenie, he's got no hope of growing out of his fascination with womens' breasts... he's male for goodness sake!

DS1 likes to have a hug with me with his head on one whilst stroking the other. At least he doesn't do it to anyone else nor in public though

Original poster

Jenie · 26/09/2003 17:09

SoupDragon - Yeah you see your son's only interested in your breasts and mine is only interested in other peoples.

The worst time was at my brothers wedding and a young girl (about 19) was wearing a low cut top and ds buried his head down and the man next to him said "Lucky devil". Oh the shame of it, I once again went red with embaressment.

So how to deal with it? Anyone?

OP posts:

SoupDragon · 26/09/2003 17:24

TBH, until he's old enough to understand when you tell him not to do it, there's not much you can do. Taking him away with a firm "no" might have an effect. Intercepting him with a distraction before he gets close enough might work as well.

I know I shouldn't laugh but I am, sorry At least you'll have lots of stories to embarrass him with when he brings home his first girlfriend!

pidge · 26/09/2003 17:24

Jenie - well if it had been me breastfeeding and another kid had come up wanting a go, I might have blushed a bit, but I wouldn't have minded at all. I feel a bit self conscious now about feeding my dd in public - she's 14 months and I never minded at all until now - but that's just because I'm aware that other people may think it's strange. I'm generally pleased if older kiddies come and ask me what I'm doing - it's good for them to see women breastfeeding openly in my view.

On the boob obsession front - I don't think there's anything you can do. Kids just will do things that we adults find embarassing. Our society has such a fixation about women's busts, and your son is just responding at the moment in a way that is completely natural to him to women's different shapes. His innocence won't last forever, he'll begin to learn what's deemed acceptable in our society and he'll reach a point where he is not this un-selfconscious. IYSWIM. Part of the joy of children is that their not restrained by the 'rules' of society.

Not very helpful - but I think kids are just bound to be embarrassing to their parents at some point! Then the roles get reversed and we start to be embarrassing to them

pupuce · 26/09/2003 17:35

Next he will be fascinated by his willy and his daddy's.... TOTALLY normal !
My son shouted "Mummy are these for your nipples?" while I was buying a bra at M&S.... and when I was trying them on in changing rooms.... the comments from my 3 1/2yo were hilarious.... the changing room next to me was laughing too !
He also pinches my breast when I come off the shower - so what - I don't think he is (dangeroulsy) obsessed !

hmb · 26/09/2003 18:03

Ds at age 3 pulled open the v of my top, looked at my boobs and said 'Wow'

Been a while since they impressed anyone, but even so......

fio2 · 26/09/2003 18:06

my son is obsessed with boobs also. He absolutely loves my big boobed friends

Think my dh must have been a leg man

Janstar · 26/09/2003 18:10

My ds (nearly 3) stares at mine like an old man would. My dh says 'You can stop that, boy or I'll knock you out sparko.' dh is fond of boxing

fio2 · 26/09/2003 18:12

Also I have a she-he friend or is it he-she, I dunno. But ds stares at his too

monkey · 26/09/2003 18:42

My ds loves 'bobies' too - and he's 4! Luckily doesn't make too much of other peoples', but now you mention it, I my best friend is really big breasted & he's forever pummeling / nuzzeling hers. Pupuce's comments made me laugh. I am so thankful I don't live in an English speaking country, so I hope most people don't understand him - the other day trying on bras - 'Mummy, why have you got your bobies out, what's that bit called (nipple) is that for the milk etc etc.

So I can't say he'll grow out of it. What men do?

Original poster

Jenie · 26/09/2003 19:28

Soupdragon - How true about the embarrassing stories! I'll save the one regarding trying to muscle in on another toddlers breast feed for a serious girl friend. he he he.

Thank you all for letting me know that my ds is not strangly obsessed with breasts (well big ones). I've spoken to a couple of parents in the past who have just said that their children have never gone through this "faze" so I was getting concerned about why my ds would be doing this. And weather or not it was normal, and it would seem to be quite normal and lets hope that he becomes more discreet about his fasination in time but until he does I'll just giggle when I get home, and let the women know that he means it as a compiment.

OP posts:

pie · 26/09/2003 19:29

er, am I the only one with a daughter who is obssessed with boobies?

aloha · 26/09/2003 19:34

OH, Jenie, I'm sorry but your posts are just making me giggle uncontrollably. My ds loves my breasts, he often slides his hand down my top! Mind you the other night after a bath with his daddy, he said, "Has mummy got willy? Has grandma got willy?" to us both. Tee hee! Babies are such lookists. Give them a well endowed teenage girl with big eyes and long hair and they are all over them....and for boys,it never stops!
Breasts just seem to say, love,comfort, survival all at once. And I think boys are more boob obsessed than girls.

Original poster

Jenie · 26/09/2003 19:52

aloha - how true about showing them a teenage girl even at a young age, I hate swimming pools when they come over to see ds and ds just starts making a play for them there and then!

Ds has very thick blonde hair and the girls love it they come over and try stroking his hair,he trys to grab the front of their bikini or nestle down if he is close enough, haven't taken him swimming for ages as I get soooo embarrassed by this.

OP posts:

rivig · 26/09/2003 19:54

my ds was just the same my dd went through a phase of not liking to see them, always trying to help me put my bra on and once in the changing rooms in a very loud voice, asked me why they were hanging down, thanks for that I thought just you wait

janh · 26/09/2003 20:11

Why is this thread making me sing "everybody needs a bosom for a pillow"?

Chinchilla · 26/09/2003 20:22

My ds likes to put his hand down my top too! My sis is very well endowed, being a 'big girl' in general, and he makes a bee-line for hers. Yesterday, when she was round looking after me (poorly ), he ran up to her and just grabbed one in each hand...what can you do? He has always been fascinated by them, even as a baby, and I think it was because he was breast fed. He must have thought, 'Just how much lunch could I get out of THOSE?' !!!

Try not to worry Jenie. I think that most mums would 'understand' that it is not a sexual thing for your son to be interested. I do understand your embarrassment though!

SoupDragon · 26/09/2003 20:42

I've just remembered the occasion we met DHs best man's new girlfriend for the first time (they're now married). DS1 was about 1 I think and the gf decided she'd like to feed him his yoghurt. Within about 10 seconds, DS1 had yoghurt on his hands and his hands on her black T shirt clad breasts.

sunchowder · 26/09/2003 21:35

What a vision Soupy! I do believe Jenie that he will grow out of it (being inappropriate as we see it) and become more discrete as the years go on! Kids are so great, I remember when my DD asked me, Mommy, why do you have fur down there?

Lethal · 27/09/2003 08:40

Jenie my 3 year old ds is also fascinated with breasts. He regularly grabs my boobs in public, usually when he's sitting in the shopping trolley & I'm pushing him (his eyes are level with my chest) or if I'm carrying him, instead of putting his hand around my neck he'll hold on to my boob instead. It's so embarrassing if anyone happens to notice. DH isn't much help, he thinks it's amusing and actually encourages ds to do it. He's started to grab his grandmother's boobs as well, but I don't think she's overly impressed by it

Lethal · 27/09/2003 08:41

Er... that is "ds is grabbing his grandmother's boobs, not dh".....

misdee · 27/09/2003 10:04

pie, your not the only with a daughter who is obsessed with boobs, mine is too. she also shouts 'boobies' and 'nipples' most days.
but the best giggle i've had in a long time, is last week she walked in on dad who was on the loo. the questions went something like this 'whats that? i dont have one of those, mummy doesnt have one of those, lolly doesnt have one of those. why do u have one of those? why? connor has one of those.' cue me creasing up in the hallway, my kids dad asking me to come get them, and me considering telling my dd1 the difference between boys and girls.
she is also going thro a stage of lifting her top up and showing everyone her 'boobs'. she is only 3.5 lol.

Flip

1 2