Naming a child after someone who has died

[NameSeeker]

I would love to name our child, in some way, in honour of a very close and beloved family member who died, who was called Helen.

I'm dubious about naming a girl the exact name- too much pressure/associations too sad? It was a very tragic, young loss. What does anyone else think?

What I'd really like to do is use a different name that is linked to Helen somehow.

Helen means "light" so anything along those lines meaning-wise would be great.

Otherwise, a phonetic link could work. We have thought of Leonard or Leon for a boy- thoughts? We've not turned our thoughts to girl's names yet (strangely). Any suggestions?

Or do you think it's something I should avoid doing completely?

(ps have got ages to decide! Early stages of pregnancy)

nameseeker, i hope you see this post from me and write back to me. i have thought about exactly this scenario as my older sister died when i was 17. i have wondered a lot about using her name. i want to but then i feel strange about it. my heart goes out to you for your loss as even my lovely sister died in 1993 it feels like yesterday and in fact just writing this makes me well up.i hope you feel good whatever you decide and as i said, i am so sorry. i have the same sad thoughts about the kids she would have had and how we could go through parenting together. in fact i feel her absence so much more keenly now.

Hey my middle name is Charis!
(Except we say Ssssh aris as mum read it in a book LOL)
Lovely idea, my dd's middle name is after my cousin who died when she was 2 (I was 12)of cancer, my sisters middle name is my mums best friend from schools name, who was murdered by her dad! Seems it's very common to do this
Horribly sad though, all this young tragic death.

My DH is Gambian and there, it's usual to name a DC after someone dead or alive. The DC will then apparently inherit the characteristics and talents of the namesake. Agree with others that is "honours" the deceased person and would make a child feel special. Surely better than naming a child after a TV character...

Helen is a lovely name. Love Helena also.

what a lovely sentiment Tryharder, i will remember that if i ever have a daughter.

My DD has my aunt's name as her middle name. My aunt died tragically at a young age when my mum was pregnant with me and I always said if I had a girl I would name her after her.

My sister also has our aunts name as a middle name and she really likes that and I like the thought of it passing down the family.

my aunty May died and i took her name for my dd1's middle name.

So sorry to hear about your sister Nameseeker

I think I would use Helen (or a variation) as a middle name. I gave my DD2 a middle name after my aunt who died very young whilst I was pregnant.

Good luck with your pregnancy

So sorry for your loss, nameseeker. My dd (and my neice) have my mother's name as a middle name - she died before they were born. I like seeing her name there as a tribute and I hope that it will mean in year to come that dd and dn are prompted to ask more questions and hear stories about the Granny they never met.

I gave my DD my mother's name as her middle name. At the time (and even now) it felt very important for me to do this. The only problem came when I had a second DD. Because my DD1's middle name meant so much to me I felt I had to give DD2 a name that was just as meaningful. This was a struggle as DH and I weren't really close to any other female relatives, and the few we were had truely horrific names! In the end I gave her the feminine version of my lovely Grandfather's name (which is luckily a great name) but it was a real dilemma for me as I didn't want one of the girls to feel left out.
I think Helen and all it's variations is lovely.

We gave DS my FiL's name as a middle name. He is called Harry William, and I am forever being asked if I'm a royalist. What's wrong with just happening to like those names. Wish I had gone with something else though.