So today my Mum told me if I call my DD the name I like it will not be allowed at her house .

[ComeWhineWithMe]

I think she is joking sort of but she was really vile to me today in front of a few of our relatives and said well if you call her that she will not be coming to my house and I'm taking back the outfit I bought her,she made herself look stupid tbh because everyone looked at her like she was a loon.

I haven't even decided on it but we really like he Violet but want the middle names Elsie Grace (yes I know they spell out VEG) but we wont really use Elsie it is just down to the fact that my Grandma has around 18 GC and GGC and noone has used her name and I do think it is a pretty name .

She has no issues with Grandma so thats not it just the fact she is a control freak and wanted me to call the baby Daisy .

Is it a really vile name it's not is it and I realise her initals spell out Veg I suppose I could find another name rather than Grace .

I am not ignoring any replies BTW just going for a quick bath.

She's mad - violet is a really pretty name.

If the VEG thing bothers you at all, you could always have Violet Grace Elsie instead.

Your mum sounds like a total loon. Is she often like this? Maybe there is bad history that you don't know about between her and your grandma? It's the only explanation I can think of for her reaction.

It is a lovely name.

Ignore your mum, i bet she feels stupid now.

I know a tiny Violet - Vi for short. Why is she so against it?

Bollocks to her! Your baby, your choice.

Tell her fine, you won't bring the baby to see her if that's her attitude. And give her the outfit back!

• You need to set the boundaries RIGHT NOW!!!

What about flipping the middle names, Violet Grace Elsie?

And, it is a lovely name and she is being insania and must being ignored.

I would just laugh and if she does it in front of family again ask her if she is having another of her hot flushes. Which would be a teensy bit mean but you know, sounds like she needs to wind her neck in a bit.

Call the baby the name you want to call her.

Your mum will come round.

I think you'd be nuts to use the initials VEG. Mind you, my surname is Tibbles so maybe I am just sensitive ;)

Nothing wrong with the name. Your Mum's being a loon.

But this is why you should never tell people the name you've chosen before the baby is born (except on MN of course ).

I love Violet - it was my dear grannys name and I'm hoping to use it one day myself.

That is a really weird reaction btw.

She is just a loon ,I already ahve 5 dc and she has always had something to say about names .

She tried to get me to agree to Daisy last week by ringing and telling me she was going to buy a blanket with the name on it so should she just put Daisy .

I don't think she minds the Elsie TBH she has said before you could use Grandmas name it is just because she has had no say in the name and no one is giving in to her ,(not that I did with my other dc) I think she was trying to ridicule me at a family event and it backfired.

I think your mum has completely overeacted and am not surprised the rest of your family thought her behaviour odd.

I like Violet and know uber cute twins (2 years old) called Violet and Rose. If you like it then use it.

I also doubt that your mum will follow through her threats and if she does well shes the one that will miss out.

BTW I found that the best strategy is not to divulge names until your DC is here...I'm pretty sure my MIL would have been negative about both my DDs names had I told her them before they were born. Once here and owning their names its much harder to be negative IYSWIM.

We had said all through pg that dd2 would be Charlotte or Jessica (middle name Alice after dh Nan as like you noone had used it) anyway night before dd2 arrived (elective csection) dh was looking through baby name book and said Harriet, I liked it but loved Hattie. When dd2 arrived we both looked at her and said Hattie. I phoned my Mum (who was looking after dd1 so couldnt be there) and said she was in SCBU (few breathing problems) and we had called her Hattie she just did a huge inwards suck of air and said 'oh well I dont like that' anyway couldnt stay on phone.

Mum and Dad came to visit at teatime (when my brotehr went to their house to look after dd1) and Mum kept going on how she looked like a Charlotte and Hattie wasnt even a proper name etc etc and then dh (who is very chilled out and never ever answers my Mum back) just said 'her name is Hattie get over it' first few weeks she called her baby, sweetie etc then started using her name, she stilldoesnt like it but admits that it suits her (shes 2 now!!)

violet is a lovely name. my mum said "can't you call him something like james?" when she heard our suggestion for ds name.

then later she said that she'd thought about it and vnormalgirlname gdd and unusualboyname gds went very well together. gdds (there is a new one with fairly exciting name now) are my brother's children.

I quite like Violet Grace Elsie, not that its any of my business but all three are lovely names

It was my mum's name so that would have been a very understandable odd thing for her to have said (She hated it) But, it's tres trendy now (Corrie barmaid, Incredibles) so of course your mum's mad.

Ignore your mother, but do change around the middle names to prevet VEG.

bung in a further name- violet rose elsie grace

won't hurt a soul

and tell your Mum she's out of order

I gave my dd1 the middle name ELISE an anagram of my grandmother's name ELSIE

it is a nice name,
and no problem with veg, she will have a surname after that so, for eg. vegb

how many times do you say the initials anyway?

'result' then maybe?
if she's that vile maybe it's good excuse not to visit!

don't worry about it - she's trying to excerise a bit of control!

My dad said he would never call my ds by his name and called him baby for quite some time, I also similiar with the in laws with my dd's name when they called her by a completely different name for a few weeks Best just to ignore it - she will come round - just make her feel like she's being really pathetic and immature is my advise!!

blimey your mother is cer-azzzy. my grans name was violet and its so so pretty. wish so much we had called dd that name. think you should try and avoid the VEG initials tho if at all possible

When i called my ds Wilfred and rang my Mum to tell her there was such a long silence on the phone i thought we had been cut of then i could hear her saying "iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii i'll have to get used to that name" I replied "yes you will Mum" and not another word has ever been said!!