Help! 6 week deadline is here! Is it a problem to use DD1's middle name for DD2???

[Missybaby]

Gave DD1 our two favourite names in case next child was a boy. Next child was a girl, so.... want to call DD2 DD1's middle name. Do you think this is a problem? DH thinks they will argue about it in years to come. Please tell me what you think. Got the appointment with registrar later today and our 6 weeks is up (yes, we have been arguing this point for several weeks....). Really don't know what to do!

I think it looks like your family only know one name...

My nephews are like this - One is Mark James, the other is James Richard...

We get it, you like James...

I think within a close family (i.e. not cousins etc) its important for children to have their own names

Gosh, I go for a shower thinking, yes I will call her DD1's middle name, then come back and see such strong opinions against it! But then, Singersgirl, you reconfirm my original thinking on this. Who uses their middle name anyway? I think that if I explain these are my favourite names and explain it properly, they won't be worried about it. I'm sure they'll realise that it wasn't a case of we couldn't be bothered to think up another name. Crikey, we've been trying to agree a name for over 10 months now! That's the problem, both agreeing to a name. I think in lots of cases, one partner doesn't really mind and gives way to the other. We have both had strong opinions on names and frankly, it's all been quite stressful!

And yes, it does sound like we have no imagination but other names we both liked either didn't work with our surname or they are the top most popular names which we don't want to do either.

I think it's a very bad idea. I didn't get my first choice for the DDs names and it doesn't matter. Give her your second choice.

well I didn't get a second name and I'm still a bit resentful! I think girsl are going to be competitive over this sort of thing anyway and you're storing up massive problems for the future, You're basically saying DD1 got all the best names so DD2's was recycled OR you wanted a boy so couldn;t be bothered to think of another name. Think of what a teenager would make of that...

I don;t think secind children get 'second best' names, we have a completely different list for DC2 from DS. It's two years later and a different baby.

Message withdrawn

I have three DDs and I can honestly saw that they would hate sharing a name in that way. Choosing their name is your chance to give them something unique and special to them. Don't do it.

So what if a name is in the top 10 names, if you and dh both like it and it will suit your dd.

TBH using a name already given to your first dd suggests that you aren't choosing a name that necessarily suits your dd, but rather one that you like regardless IYSWIM.

Also, dd's name is in the top 10 but I have yet to meet another Lucy of her age - out of her year at school, no other Lucys.
I know 4 Olivias out of school, and yet there are none in dd's school year.
What I'm trying to say is that a popular name in terms of statistics doesn't mean that your dd will be one of x number of Emilys or whatever.

I have 2 (nearly 3 DDs) and I don't think I would do it either sorry.

DD1 got our girls name then when we found out DD2 was a girl we had a completely different set of names, the name we shose for her I would never have thought of before but I love it now.

DD3 has a name we both like

Theres so many beautiful girls names out there surely you can find another one you love?

There are literally thousands of names to choose from.

Are you really telling us you can't decide and agree on one name for your child?

I think that's quite sad to share names between your children, it's as if they aren't special enough to have their own name.

Oh no, please don't. I think it seems like you couldn't be bothered.

Actually I can't believe you have had nine months & 6 weeks to sort this out, and still haven't decided.

there must be some girls names you like... and what if it is in the top whatever of popular names... my dd has a fairly popular name, but i've never met another little girl with the same name yet!! Just because its popular doesn't mean everyone is called that!!

we have very different names for our potential 3rd dc than either of our 2 now!! none of the names were even mentioned first time around!!

is there no other women in the family you can name them after?? grand mother?? aunty??

i would if its the name you like its a sort of tribute to dd1

ignore everyone and call her what you want

My first name is my sister's middle name. It's the name of my mum's fave saint and when she had my sister she didn't think I'd be coming along 8 years later in need of something saintly!
I've never really minded to be honest, and found it pretty funny as it does sort of prove I was an 'afterthought' and it is something to tease my mum about! The only thing it occasionally caused mix-ups with was official documents and letters, and me opening my sister's letters / bills when we shared a house! But I wouldn't say it was ever a problem or an issue -- maybe because of the age gap?

Please don't do it. Speaking as a middle sister, it's bad enough having to always be second in line, without having a hand-me-down name too. I'm deadly serious BTW. Terrible idea.

I have an Uncle Paul and his kiddies are called David Paul and Paul David ....

Missybaby...did you do it?

OK everyone I have decided not to 'steal' DD1s middle name as it suddenly occurred to me that she may want to use it herself for some other purpose (I don't know, but say she wanted to start up a clothing line or be an artist but not use her own name, she could use her middle name etc etc). So, I cancelled the appointment, literally when parked outside the registrars and have decided to call DD2 the 'popular' name choice but need to find a middle name that works. Have noted comments re. 'popular' names below and that makes me feel happier about using this name, ie doesn't mean there will be 10 of the same name in her class. This was the name we could both agree on that works with our surname. So, now we just need to find a middle name.
I am embarrassed to have taken so long to name her but finding the time once DD2 was born has been difficult (never get a moment's peace, don't you know!)

Yay!

Now we can find you a middle name . Any requirements?

hanaflower, that's interesting. can anyone indeed confirm?

come on tell us the name now so we can come up with a good middle name?