In-laws using Nickname I hate

[Abba21]

I recently had a baby and picked her name. It’s short and sweet. Now my in laws have started calling her by a nickname that’s longer than her name and I can’t stand it. Is it weird to decide to call a baby by a nickname when it’s not your baby? I think it’s crazy and it’s driving me mad. Terms of endearment are lovely and of course always welcome. Like my mil calls her little hen. So cute, but I can’t stand the nickname his family is using and he’s even started using it too :/

Family will have their own relationship with your daughter, if she doesn’t like the name I’m sure she will correct them as she gets older.

this just isn’t the hill to die on, there will be other (more important) places to put a line in the sand.

I think it's normal and not weird for family members to call a baby by a nickname (and her friends certainly will once she starts school), but if you REALLY hate it have you tried asking them not to?

It's not weird to call other people by nicknames when you're not related to them, but you should not use nickname they hate.
I think we need to know what's the nickname.

for example Ruth -> Ruthie - I can see why they are using the nickname, but Ruby -> Rubabooboo - I can see why you would be slightly grated.

Ask them not to. A baby doesn't need a nickname.

Ask them not to. On the basis you can’t stop them though, I’d let this one go, there will be other hills to die on.

Isn’t it endearing that’s who she is to them & probably only them? Like when kids name their grandparents by the way they associate them or understand them? Won’t it make her feel special growing up knowing that’s what they call her which is unique to her & different to how she’s named at home? I don’t see it as they’re trying to change her name per se more a term of endearment.

I don’t think it’s weird and it really wouldn’t bother me. However, she’s your baby and it’s certainly not unreasonable to tell them how it makes you feel. I’d expect they’ll all be gobsmacked though and it might give them food for gossiping about you and how precious you are.

Yes totally agree with you all. I think it’s annoyed me because it’s since the first time they met her. So they’ve never used her actual Name. The nickname is Rennie . Her name is Wren. It annoys me because it reminds me of the heartburn medicine 😅🤦‍♀️

Ah I think that's cute!

My guess is that they're calling her Wrennie. And yes, single syllable names tend to have ie added to them by loving family. I'd focus on the endearment and not the name.

Yes this must be the hormones taking over 😅 maybe I’ll get used to it

Our little girl gets called Dolly by my inlaws and I can’t stand it 😂 completely unrelated to her name. But they love her and she isn’t bothered!

I think it’s cute, you’re hearing Rennie but they’re thinking Wrennie. and I think it’s better not to kick your DD’s debut in the world off with a negative interaction from the outset. They sound doting and in the end that’s what is far more important for her.

They will have told their friends her real name is Wren, and yours all know. Noone will think anything of it - and I’d get in early and tell your friends you don’t like it so they don’t start and you can isolate it to her gps.

Also in years to come your DD may say something. I’d honestly just let it lie.

Yes thank you, that’s a good idea. I’ll focus on the endearing aspect and the spelling you’ve done is helpful to picture it differently to the medicine

Normal and not weird. My in-laws are Indian and came up with all sorts of nicknames for my children that I would never have imagined, based on their names and Indian variations of their names. It's done out of love and I let them get on with it. You'll never be able to control what nicknames your child has. As long as they're not abusive, let them crack on!

Thank you, you’re so right!

Oh I can totally see why it’s annoying op. But I’d let it go. If that’s the worst thing your inlaws do 🤷🏻‍♀️

I agree ignore it.

You can gently ask them not to, if you like.. but nicknames do just emerge, your baby is a person in her own right and your family will have their own relationship with her.

You can ask your partner if he can try not to - but you can’t insist and it might be he likes it.

Thank you, glad I’m not the only one. Yeah I think I’ll be letting this go and hopefully I’ll just get used to it 😅

It happens when they get to school too. My dcs have had a few teachers and friends who used nicknames that were not the ones we used ( think Rob for Robert yet we use Bobby as an eg). It does have a “nails on blackboard” feel but if your Dc don’t mind, you have to start learning to roll with it. Not always easy though !

You can ask them not to. My mum actually changed my whole first name because her in-laws kept using a nn that she hated. It's your baby - you went to the trouble of choosing a name you love and the least people could do is respect it and use it!

My family did this with DD’s name. I wasn’t keen. She is now 15 (and a nickname is the least of the worries I have about her!!!!!) and all of her friends call her it and she even gets it printed on her sports tops!!
I have to admit it didn’t take long for me to use it too!!!! 🫣 it’s not my favourite nickname version of her name, but you can only control so much.
Wren is a gorgeous name, but remember to come back here to laugh the first time that you call her it yourself! 😂

Did you not see that nickname coming though?

That’s hideous!

My first thought was on the heartburn tablets too.

Also reminds me of René from ‘Allo ‘Allo.

I’d guess that as she grows into her own name, they’ll drop it. The more that people use her proper name, the more the nickname will fade out.

My eldest was given a nickname when when she was little - Imo (short for Imogen), which we didn’t mind. When it evolved into Mo-Mo I was horrified. Now that she’s a teen everyone uses her full name.