Why do the mumsnet community hate popular names?

[YourAmberFawn]

Hi everyone,

Maybe a little rant… but I am genuinely curious.
I see a lot of hate on here for names for being popular
Names such as Margot, Jude, Sophia, Luca, e.x.t
While I understand being wary of a popular name, I personally think there’s a difference between popular and trendy - and most of these names have stood the test of time! A lot of the time a name is popular because it is a good name!!
I was wondering why a lot of you dislike popular names? But on the same hand, dislike any new and usual name and brand them impractical?

How high / low in the top 100 would your ideal baby name be?

@Ladamesansmerci , what makes a name silly?

Resistance is not futile?

Because it's boring? Why would you name your child a name when you know there will be 3 or 4 other with the same name in their class. I actually think it's quite cruel.

@Tbrh Because you don't know how many there will be in a class until the child is in the class. Why is it cruel to give a baby a name you love when lots of other people love it too?

One of my siblings gave their baby an underused name. They got comments like 'What sort of name is that?!' and 'Oh, we were planning on calling our baby that'.
The name is very popular now.

Because names are meant to identify us.

I have an overused 70s name and I hate it. Always having to add my surname or initials, I feel my parents could have tried a little harder to find a more original and memorable name. There are so many names to choose from. SO many lovely normal names that are easy to pronounce and spell outside the top 100.

And it’s not only about sharing a name with others in a class but sharing your name with office colleagues and other parts of your life. It’s a pain.

Identity theft is also a problem when having a very common name.

My theory is localised saturation. If a certain name is ten a penny where one lives, it's likely to become dull and uninspired in that person's view, even though it may not be near so popular in another area.

This!

Also the being not just one of several Julies everywhere but one of two Julie Anne Smiths in a school/organisation.

I don't like a lot of the popular names because I think they're quite wanky at the minute.

I get that names come and go nobody is naming their child Nigel, Ken or Geoffrey but all the Ottilies and Quentins are a bit much. I get it if you're naming baby for your beloved late grandfather.

But otherwise I think they're probably just doing it to fit in with other people with NW3 aspirations and, frankly, that is a weird thing to inflict on a child. I say that as someone whose name was once very, very popular and now very dated.

While I'm here, I don't understand why people give surnames as a first name. There are plenty of very normal first names out there.

But your child, your choice. 🤷🏼‍♀️

Nigel, Ken and Geoffrey are fine. Better than many of the currently popular names.

Nigel, Kenneth and Geoffrey were very popular in the 1950s. They seem old fashioned and dated now.
Ottilie and Quentin don’t have those associations as they were never super fashionable, and so they feel more ‘fresh’ and timeless.

OP none of those names you listed have “stood the test of time”. Yes, they are well established names but they have all greatly risen in popularity over the last couple of decades which means that unless they stay popular they risk becoming the Karen or Kevin etc of 40 years time. Depends if you want to risk that.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with popularity as such imo - in fact I think there’s more benefits than negatives (such as it being more likely that most people will get the spelling and pronunciation right for a start!, as well as fitting in, getting stuff with their name on etc).

Names that have stayed perennially popular like Elizabeth, William, James, Edward, Alexander, Thomas etc are pretty risk free in regards to them dating so personally I don’t care that there’s a fair chance there will be another one in school (or several in larger schools). Gone are the days when there were 3 in a class, as there’s such a wide spread of names now.

But I don’t want to risk my kids name dating - so personally if I’m lucky enough to have another child I’m planning to go for a name that has always been popular like the ones above (as I did for my first) or a name that has never been quite popular enough to make the Top 100 (or maybe at least only very briefly and below the Top 50). I’d prefer my child had a name that doesn’t link them to a specific time period, when it’s an easy enough thing to avoid.

I donthink Charlotte is. Here there are so many. Mostly Charli or Lottie, but it is not uncommon to have multiple Charlottes, lotties and Charlis in the same class.

I have a name which is currently very popular, but was virtually unheard of 26 years ago (when I was born).

I've gone from hearing how rare and lovely my name is... to everyone hating it and saying how "common" it is!

Short answer: I’m not sure all of mumsnet hates popular names, but the baby names forum is (naturally) frequented by people who are especially interested in names.

I don’t think those people hate popular names as such but they are a) probably more interested in discovering “ fresh” names than most b) probably have a lower tolerance for repeated names, and b) see trends emerging on here before they hit ONS or local saturation, so are bored of names before they actually become popular. For example, if you do a search for “I see XXX suggested on here a lot, so it probably will become popular soon” you will get tons of hits.

Also, a lot of the time, OPs who don’t study the ONS data or darkgreener are asking about opinions on XXX because they are looking for something unusual, or timeless, or one that you don’t come across too often; that’s when you often have people piling in to let the OP know that the name has been very rapidly rising up the charts so probably isn’t unusual, is likely to date, and might come across it frequently.

No one in my family was and is ever named after family members.

Though our names and children's names are also chosen for their meaning regardless of the language the name originated from.

Especially if you have a very common last name.

Back in the days when people got paid by cheque two of my friends at different time got their pay cheques paid into a namesake born in the same year bank account. They eventually sorted the issue out after a few weeks as it was the individual bank's error both times. One had an extremely common combination of names as her last name is in the top 10, while the other's last name was in the top 50.

I have worked in companies were people have email addresses like [email protected] as there are/have been multiple people with that band who have worked at the company.

Now myself and my DD don't have that issue.

Does it matter? Why can't people choose what they want and be free to say what they don't? Why do people have to always feel judged over every thing?, i do wonder how people get up in the morning without finding a way to be offended

There are names i like there are names i don't and I don't care if anyone likes my child's name or not, or a name I like or not in general

Does it matter? Why can't people choose what they want and be free to say what they don't? Why do people have to always feel judged over every thing?, i do wonder how people get up in the morning without finding a way to be offended

There are names i like there are names i don't and I don't care if anyone likes my child's name or not, or a name I like or not in general

I don’t necessarily dislike top 10 names but why would I want my child to be 1 of 4 children named Noah or Luca in their class? It just seems so cookie cutter and boring. By the same token I am not naming my baby Constantinople just to be different. I want a name with meaning to me & my partner and something we both like.

You do realise you come across very offended in that response right? Oh, the irony

That's a good point actually. Comments about popularity may be mistaken for negativity, when actually they're just advising the OP based on their personal criteria (not necessarily how the person who is responding feels about that name, or popular names in general).

I don't have anything against personal names, but I will advise someone that a name they're considering is "too popular" if they've specifically said they wish to avoid popular names and are seemingly clueless how popular their choice currently is.

I always find that situation strange though. I mean, why would you apparently want to avoid a popular name, yet can't be bothered to research the current popularity of your chosen name?! I've never really understood that logic, considering ONS data is easily obtainable if (if means that much to you).

On the flip side though, having a very unusual name (first and surname combination) can be incredibly identifying. No privacy on a Google search. Whereas if someone tried to Google me (fairly common first and surname combination) they wouldn't find a thing on my name alone, they'd need to know a lot more personal details than that.

There are positives and negatives to each scenarios (popular vs unusual name). For everyone who has a popular names and hates the "lack of identity" (or whatever you want to call it), there's one who is glad to just blend in. For everyone who loves the uniqueness of their own unusual name, there's one who hates how it makes them stand out.

Basically, nobody can know what their future child will prefer, so you can only pick something based on your own preferences. Who knows whether your children will thank you one day or not?

Ottilie and Quentin don’t have those associations as they were never super fashionable, and so they feel more ‘fresh’ and timeless.
To you maybe. I think neither are fresh or timeless, and they seem, to use a pp's term, wanky.

It’s more that they don’t have the associations of names used by recent generations. Barbara, Nigel, Kenneth, Linda — we all know living people with those names. The generation that went back to Edwardian names like Violet, Ivy, Reggie, Maud etc had no such association with those names, but the Barbaras and Nigel’s would have, so didn’t use them. In time, names like Sharon, Tracey, Kevin and Gary will seem ‘fresh’, once people with those names have died off enough for the Quentins and Ottillies doing the naming not to have associations with them!