Why do the mumsnet community hate popular names?

[YourAmberFawn]

Hi everyone,

Maybe a little rant… but I am genuinely curious.
I see a lot of hate on here for names for being popular
Names such as Margot, Jude, Sophia, Luca, e.x.t
While I understand being wary of a popular name, I personally think there’s a difference between popular and trendy - and most of these names have stood the test of time! A lot of the time a name is popular because it is a good name!!
I was wondering why a lot of you dislike popular names? But on the same hand, dislike any new and usual name and brand them impractical?

How high / low in the top 100 would your ideal baby name be?

Ironically lots of the names I really liked but DP vetoed for being too out there are in the top 100. DS’s solid family name turns out to be unusual for his cohort. I think this means I win smug MN after all.

@Emanwenym yep- me and hubby both there and in that age bracket -all good solid names!! lol

Being honest my son who is 26 has a name that I think was number2 or 3 when he was born - classic traditional name as old as the hills- I still like it-and if he was going to be a girl he was going to be Laura -
personally I’m not a fan of really ‘out there’ names but each to his own - a lot of popular names are also quite classic over the years, things like Oliver, Jack, Oscar, max, Lily, Olivia, Amelia etc

Exactly. There were four other girls with my name in my class of 30 all the way through primary school. It made me feel generic, like an item in a multipack.

I can only answer for myself.
I like, and would use, many popular and trendy names but not all. I dislike the sound and meanings of some names.
That is just my preference.

Sometimes I am not encouraging of a certain name due to reasons of poor initial combos, sounds clashing with surnames etc. Sometimes those names are popular or trendy - sometimes not.

If my favourite name were in the top ten, I would still use it.
I also love the use of family names, no matter where they come in popularity.

I think how many are in a class or play group is irrelevant. Because your child will grow up, move areas and probably end up working with a lot of people with their name.

I have a popular 80s name, there were two of us in school. Now I work with an endless number of people with the same name as me.

The reason I avoided popular names is because back in the day, Sharon and Tracey were very popular names and now have a chavvy image. Although obviously this image is totally undeserved for most women with these names. I think it is just safer to go with traditional names they are unlikely to be saddled with any issues.

I'm an early 80s born child. In primary school there were 4 Rebecca's and 3 Claire⁩s, my name is traditional but not popular. Not in the top 100 and nobody else in school or work with the same name. I choose modern but not popular names for my children that I love

I'd disagree with you there. I don't know a single child with any of those names, and I deal with a lot of children.

@YourAmberFawn
I'd say (if it's true, which I dispute) it's because a lot of people went through their schooldays as Sarah B, Sarah with and H, Sarah C, Mel A, Mel B, Mel C, Mel D, etc. and they don't want that for their children.

I know lots of young Davids, 1 young Sarah and 3 young Victorias. @mathanxiety, and one youngish Mark.

I don't like popular names because I have never met anyone with the same name as myself and so think it must be very strange to share something as personal as a name with anyone else.

Is that you Jimberleigh?

What?

@YourAmberFawn , it was in response to the post above mine.

Shock horror, different schools and different areas have kids with different names. They're perhaps out of favour now in predominantly white British areas, but in more multicultural areas they will still feature.

I've taught multiple kids called David and Sarah over the last 15 years or so, and also know a young Victoria and Mark. All 4 names are still widely used, with David still being top 100 popular. It's the most popular boy's name in our school in fact, as it's very popular among both our Eastern European and African communities. It's one of the many reasons I laugh when people try to put others off top 10 names by saying they'll be one of many in school, as nobody would say that about David and yet it's one of the only names we actually do have many of, proving you can never predict such things.

I wouldn't be able to automatically guess the age of anyone with those 4 names, as their usage stretches across generations. The definition of 'classic'.

It's a personal thing for me , my own name was the number one name for a few years in the 80s/90s . There were always 3/4 of us where ever I'd go and I genuinely hated it. I was in college with another who even had the same middle name too . So I didn't want to do that to my children.

I’m not sure I agree. My sense of baby names here is that people like the classic and popular names. Most unusual or rare names are seen as too “out there” and likely to lead to the child being bullied. And there’s often a conflation of rare names with strange spellings of existing names.

You're right that there's a difference between popular and trendy. On the whole popular traditional names are liked (or if disliked it's because the poster thinks they're boring rather than awful). So Thomas, James, Robert, Arthur, Theodore etc are typically liked; Mason, Cooper, Jaxon seen as trendy and daddy. Other names like Arlo, Archie, Albie etc are somewhere in between.

I also agree with the poster upthread who mentioned Freakonomics - there's an interesting chapter in there about name choices. The book's 20 years or do old but the principles haven't changed. I think the psychology of name choices/unspoken reasons why we are drawn to certain names but not others is really interesting!

(BTW it's etc (short for et cetera), not ext 🙂)

Um, I'm definitely Mumsnet community and have been here for about 20 years with name changes. All my children have top 200 names as the criteria was nothing too bizarre, hard to spell, or difficult to pronounce.

I think other posters have mentioned this, popular names get attached to certain decades. We all have an idea in our heads as to how old a Sharon, Tracy or Christine is likely to be. Likewise with a Lee, Chris or Mike.
Meanwhile the upper classes use classic names, or family names - I don’t think Boris Johnson’s mum picked his name for example, and the royal family have limited bucket of names to draw from.
So it makes sense that many older mumsnetters who have seen names come and go would choose more timeless names over more trendy names, and recognize that it might give the kid a degree of flexibility in how they present themselves to the world.

@BoleynMemories13 ,David is popular here too. Some names are regional - the ONS shows the most popular name by area, and I think in some areas, the top name isn't in the top 100.

I agree. I think we've well and truly broken the tradition of naming babies after family members and now it's a free for all. You set your child up for life with this special name that will make them the most special /unusual. Except, a name is just a name.

I have one of the most common names from my generation and I don't think life would have been ny different had I been named something 'unique'.

There is a difference between using a name that has always been well used eg Charlotte, Thomas and using names that appear from nowhere, often celebrity driven eg Sienna, Mila

This is a key point. Popular names are generally popular either because of a trend or because they are classic. The trendy ones will obviously date more than the classic ones. My DD has a popular name, but it’s one with a long history of use and has a lovely sound and meaning. I chose it because I loved it and wasn’t concerned about its popularity (as it happens we’ve only come across one other child with the name at either school or nursery). I also wanted to give her a ‘normal’ first name as she has an extremely unusual surname!

I liked many popular names, I just prefer not to use them myself. An alternative spelling of my daughter's name is somewhere around 1600 in the UK (although I don't live in the UK). The spelling we use isn't in the charts at all. We considered Emilia but rejected it because it's a top 10 name where we live. There's now a baby Emilia at my daughter's nursery whereas everyone we meet has never heard my daughter's name before. (It's not a made up name though - it's Ukrainian, chosen because my grandfather was Ukrainian and we thought it would be nice to include something from my family since she has her dad's surname). If we have another I doubt we'll go that unique again - unless we find another Ukrainian name we happen to both love - but most likely not top 100 either.