Choosing a middle name

[Zellie1027]

Wondering what people's thoughts are on middle names...

My first little girl has my mum's name as her middle name. My mum passed away about 10 years ago so it's very meaningful to me.

We are now having a second little girl. I'm stuck with her middle name. I want her to have something meaningful too but we honestly don't have any other name, apart from my mum's middle name, that has meaning but I don't feel it goes with our chosen name (which is Millie, and the middle name would be Mary, so Millie Mary).

So it's either:
No middle name (anyone have children where one has a middle name and the other doesn't?)
A random middle name (at least we would like how it sounds but no meaning)
Or Mary (meaningful but I'm not sure it sounds right)

I am totally aware I am fully overthinking this (it's a particularly good skill of mine!). I'm 37 weeks now and on maternity leave so nothing else to occupy my mind.

Please help me with your thoughts!

I think middle names should have a meaning....I always find it a bit odd when people just choose a random name they like as a middle name. In our family, all our middle names have a link back to previous generations and relatives who are no longer alive. I have the same middle name as my grandmother

Millie Mary sounds fine and you don’t often say the full name anyway IMO

What about your dh's dm's name/dgm's name?

What’s your middle name? Could you use that?

One of my dc has a middle name that is a nod to a relative but the others just have middle names that we liked.

Sorry just realised I didn't even answer your question specifically....could you go back and look further at previous generations...or if there's a man in your family you were close to, the feminine version of that name...that is another thing we have in our family.

I think it would be good to give a middle name even if it is not from another family member. I think the child might feel nobody tried otherwise. It could be any name though. I mean any name is better than no name, I think.

I didnt go meaningful. Aside from one being an ette ending like my own middle. I just crammed in all the other names I liked but didn't want as first!

Other grandparent's name? Your DM's maiden name? Your DGM's first/middle/maiden name? Etc.

My 2 DC's names are:
First Name; Grandad 1's name; Grandad 2's name; Surname
First Name; MIL's 1st name; DM's maiden name; Surname

Ds due in a few weeks is having his great grandads name as his middle name..not sure it matches but it means a lot to DH so oh well!

I doubt anyone will call him by his first and middle name anyway - well as the parents we won't be

Our first born DD has the other name we picked for her on our short list (no meaningful connections) and our DS has my dad's name as his middle name (very meaningful to me). To be honest they are very rarely used or referred to, but I think it's better to keep it consistent with a middle name for each.

I doubt anyone will call him by his first and middle name anyway - well as the parents we won't be.

Yes, this. It's easy to focus too much (IMO) on how the names "flow" but you hardly ever use your full name anyway! I think that's how so many people end up choosing Rose/May/Grace/James etc as middle names (since they often flow nicely), but they're so overused and it seems a bit pointless unless the name has meaning to the parents!

Is there a grandfather whose name can be feminised?
ie
George - Georgette, Georgina, Georgia

A version of Mary?
Maria, Marianne, Mariette

One meaning of Mary is drop of the sea. So maybe a water related name?

Cordelia, Brooke, Simone, Maya, Marisa.

Otherwise just use a name you like.

I love Mary as a middle name, it has a gentleness to it. Much nicer than a single syllable filler name, which strike me as twee.

A name from her father side perhaps?

A name from your side but going back to a different generation.

A name that has some meaning to you or is appropriate for birth season - Holly, Ivy, Daisy, Rose, Summer, Autumn, June, May etc. Depending on when she's born of course.

To be honest I wasn't remotely concerned with mine having a meaningful middle name. My son has my partner's name as a middle name because they just flowed nicely together, and for our daughter who is on the way we have a random middle name that just sounds nice with the first name we've picked!

Did your mum have a middle name? Maiden name you can use? Birthflower?

Wow I'm overwhelmed with all your responses, thank you for taking the time! I genuinely thought I'd get 1 or 2 responses!

Just to add some further information:

My middle name is also Mary.. same as my mum's

My husband doesn't want to use his mum's name (he has a very good relationship with her, just doesn't want to use her name).

My mum's mum's name was Lily, so Millie Lily is a bit of a tongue twister! I don't believe she had a middle name. I never met Lily as sadly she had passed away before I was born. As lovely as it would be to have her name, it doesn't bear much meaning to me because of that

I am warming to Millie Mary now some of you have said it sounds ok. Maybe I just need to keep saying it

And those who have said if we don't give a middle name she might feel like we didn't bother, that's exactly how I feel so I'm glad I asked now as that's cemented that for me! I wasn't sure if I was being sensitive feeling like that, or overthinking it!

Choosing names is such a big decision, so I appreciate you all taking the time to help me!

Think about names of other family members, be they alive or not, whom you might want to remember/honour.

As long as your surname doesn’t begin with M as well! Like Millie Mary Marlow or something 😂

Based on your update, I’d go with Millie Mary. I think it sounds lovely and it’s obviously important to you that it has meaning.

I’ve always been adamant that I’d name any daughter of mine after my amazing grandma. It’s a very old fashioned name and we used it as a middle. It actually rhymes with her first name and doesn’t really “go” at all - but I’m so pleased I stuck to my guns. She has a first name I love and a middle name that I love, and no one apart from me every uses both anyway!

I like Milly Mary, I think it sounds great even hyphenated and used as one name

What about something like Millie Rosemary?

How about Millie Jayne Mary?

I think since yours and your daughters middle name is Mary I'd definitely go with that, so she doesn't feel left out :)

Are you saying you've already used Mary, your mum's name, as your eldest daughter's middle name? I wouldn't give two siblings the same middle name.

Since you already used your mum's name, it seems an obvious choice to use your husband's mum's name this time so each child is named for a grandmother. It's a shame you say he doesn't want to do this even though they have a good relationship. Does he just not like the name? Does she have a middle name as an alternative?

Otherwise, what about your first name as your daughter's middle name?