Would you honour your MIL and not your own mum?

[Samzzz]

I have two other children and all of their middle names are honour names and would like the same for our third and last child. I am now thinking of using my MIL’s name as a middle name for this baby. But do you think it’s weird not acknowledging my own mum? I am very close to my mum now but growing up we had a very complex relationship due to her own issues and I wasn’t in her care for the majority of my childhood. Even though we are close now it doesn’t feel right to name my child after her due to the complexities.
My MIL is now in her mid 70’s and this will be her 6th and final grandchild and the only one that will be named after her. I know it would mean the absolute world to her and she is a very hands on and involved grandmother to all the children.
Am I over thinking it regarding my own mum? Should I let her know before I announce the baby’s name?
Thoughts would be appreciated, thanks.

Can you use a female version of your dad’s name? Kids won’t care who’ve they’ve been named after m but they will notice if they don’t have the same amount of names, so give child 3 2 middle snakes even if the second is random. You don’t have to honour everyone. We can’t with only ever having one child and have decided to give them their own names.

Maybe just say to everyone that you like the name and that’s why you are using it. I would try to depersonalise it as mush as possible to avoid any potential gloating.

I would use your MILs name and something else like a female version of your dad's name.

If your mum queries it you could say you're thinking of her name for your next child. Only you know there won't be a next child!

What they ^ said. Use your dmil's name, if your mother asks you, tell her you plan to use hers for the next one.

Thank you for all your comments. I think I’ve decided to stick with using my MIL’s name but will also add my own MN. My other DC have two MN’s so makes sense to do the same for this baby. Her middle names will be Tess Louise.
I’m just not going to make a big deal about it and if my mum asks then I will say my DP wanted to use his mums name and I added my middle name for our family connection. I’m sure my mum will be fine x

Just use the name and don't mention honouring anyone to your side of the family, she might not even notice.

Using your MIL's name is lovely. It seems it will mean a lot to you all. It would be fine to just have one middle name.

If you'd really like to use two middle names maybe you could find an association that is positive ..
You use your mother's favourite flower,
Your father's name (female version)
Place where you were born.
Mothers favourite colour.
Have two other names you like and ask your mother to choose.

I've done that. Like you have a really complex relationship with my mum & my mother in laws name really goes with my daughters name too. Probs wouldn't consider it if she had a name I didn't like tbh 🤣 but I am really close with her too & she was so happy when she found out.