The Gabriel / James issue again. Long rambling post....

[frannied]

Hi,I posted my dilemma about choosing between these 2 names a few weeks ago, but am still in a mess with it. When he was born he was Gabriel, then people (men mainly)started saying he'd be teased (Gay jokes etc). So, after alot of deliberating we decided to call him James, which we did for a month. Then I started hearing the name James absolutely everywhere, and although I'm not into names that make a child 'unique' and all that, I also don't want him to be one of many James in his class. So then I started calling him Gabriel again and DH has been gradually coming round to swapping back. But on saturday I bumped into a friend ( a v. cosmopolitan, broad minded friend)who shocked me by being adamant that my ds's life WOULD be made hell through teasing. So now I'm back to square one and I'm hating and annoying myself by being so indecisive.

My DS is being christened on sunday, so I've got to make a permenant decision or we'll have to change is name by deedpoll after that, if we make the wrong choice.

These are the issues that are doing my head in, and some general questions:-

1)I love the name Gabriel but I wouldn't want to make my ds's life remotely tricky, so should I just stick to James?

2. I know James is in the top 10, but is it really very common?? Do you know loads of Jameses? Is it a boring, non-descript name?

• DS is registered as Gabriel James. Is it ridiculous to call someone by their middle name, or should we just swap the names round and make his life simple? But I feel his name IS Gabriel James even if he is known as James, if that makes sense. Any mums netters known by their middle names - how is it?

*Does anyone know any adult Gabriels - were they teased?

God, what a mess. My poor ds. Got to make a final decision by sunday once and for all.
Thanks, Fx

Honestly. My BF named her son Gabriel despite her OH thinking exactly the same thing. He gets called Gabe, it's adorable. My bro's BF is Gabriel, he loves his name, has always been Gabes (but spelled Gabz for some reason) and has never been called Gay. Tell them to get over it if you like it!

I posted on your last thread regarding your name dilemma.

As I said before, we have a Gabriel Patrick, we called him this because we love the name Gabriel. Ofcourse there are people that will stick there nose in and be rude about your choice of name, but he is your baby and the name you have chose is one that means something to you.

Fgs it's not like you have chosen Adolf or Satan etc.... Gabriel is gorgeous and I definately think you should go with.... I think if you go with James you will regret it in the long run.

I have had a few negative comments but on the whole people say what a beautiful name it is.

Be strong and go with Gabriel.

Thanks everyone.xx

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Oh go with Gabriel - so lovely. James a little non-descript ...

I really wanted to call my DS Gabriel but DH would not have it, he did not like it for all the obvious reasons. I ended up giving up on it in a moment of weakness but I think Gabriel is a lovely name and I also think that the sorts of people that would be twattish about it are the sorts of people not worth bothering with.

I have a 14 month old ds named Gabriel Isaac and have never once thought of the 'gay' teasing possibility until I read this post. Gabriel was the first and only name dh and I thought of when choosing boy names.

The only thing that drives me crazy about his name is when people pronounce his name as Gahbrielle. Not Gabriel. I always have to remind them that Gabrielle is the feminine form of Gabriel. The blardy KIndermusik lady even wrote his name in her book as Gabrielle!!!!

Bit of a hi-jack here. Sorry.....

Gabriel (and especially Gabe) is a lovely name, but you should really follow your own instincts (and even doubts, sorry).

Gabriel is a lovely, lovely name and it would be such a shame to have your actions dictated by a very stupid, utterly vacuous section of society...

Go for it and be proud of your choice, it's lovely.

Speaking as the mother of a 5 year old, I can tell you that ALL children are teased in the playground! You won't stop that by calling him James, so you may as well have the name you love.

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Lotus, that's so odd, all sorts of people call my Gabriel "Gabrielle" too, even though he's very obviously a boy and not a chanteuse with an eyepatch.

I have the female version of Gabriel as my middle and really got the piss taken out of me about it at school. However, I think that was because it was my middle name; a secret that got discovered. I'm not sure I would have had teh same treatment had it been my first name. They did used to say Gabriel though, which really pissed me off.

Ha, just read lotus's post now !

My DS is registered at our Drs as Gabriel James and I have also experienced the reception staff calling out "GabriELLE" as in the girls' name. It pissed me off too. Even a couple of women I know from toddler groups have said it this way too. its as if they've never even heard of the name Gabriel and so haven't go a clue how to say it.

HereWeGoRoundTheMulberryBag - DH would never agree to changing his name to a totally different, 3rd name - I'm doing his head in as it is!! We really struggled with boys names anyway. We did think of adding another middle name though - Alexander, Patrick (after my dad - but my sis has just called her ds Patrick), or Rafferty!!

I know a Gabriel and have never heard that he had this problem. I think James is a nicer name though.

I have a Gabriel and we sometimes shorten his name to Gabes.

yes, I too was astonished at how many people claimn not to know how to pronounce it. we get Gabrielle a lot too.
it is a bit annoying, but then ds1 has a name that not many people know how to pronounce either so I guess I'm used to it lol

We call our Gabriel : Baby Gabe and gorgeous Gabriel!

I love Gabriel. Definitely Gabriel.

I think that Gabriel is a lovely name and if he's going to get teased in the playground then it'll happen anyway.

But James is a lovely name too - it is certainly not unusual and I expect there'll be at least one other in my son's class, but the playgroups we go to aren't exactly overrun with Jameses. And James has lots of not unattractive 'short's - Jim, Jem, Jamie. Gabriel has Gay, or Gaybo (aka Gay Byrne in Ireland), or other such Gay+ names. IME, boys invariably have their names shortened by their mates, so I'd certainly consider that before you make your final decision.

Gabriel. There are loads of Jameses in the world. There was a Gabriel at school and he wasn't teased. And it was the kind of school where you could get teased about anything!!!! I have several friends and relatives who choses to start using their middle names as they got older - mainly teenage years - because they were more distinctive than their first names. eg bro is Andrew Ambrose and has been known as Ambrose since he went to uni.

I've heard of people name James also going by Gabe like Richard and Dick.... am I the only person thats had this happen or is this an actual occurrence?

ZOMBIE

Wee Gabriel or James would be a teenager by now

I was going to comment on this then realised I did 13 years ago...