Everyone pronounces our daughter's name wrong

[StarShine23]

Hi all, advice needed please.

We named our daughter after someone we know from abroad. Its a pretty simple name but we had never heard it in the UK before. Baby is now 1 and the name has become more popular here, but it has a different pronunciation than we use. The problem we have is we don't like way its pronounced here, but everyone we meet now calls her by the UK version rather than her name, even though we correct them.

Do we:
(a) stick to our original pronunciation, even though it will be a battle for her growing up when other people with the same name all pronounce it the UK way
(b) accept the UK version, even though we dont like it and to us, doesn't suit her
(c) change her name

Has anyone else been through this? What did you do / wish you had done?

We feel awful that we have unwillingly picked something that is going to be tricky for her now all her life, but we love the name.

@trainboundfornowhere , that was my initial thought but I used Amelie as an example name instead in case there were lots of mothers of Elodie on here. It's lovely in French.

I have this situation. My name is unusual but most people have heard of it due to semi-famous person who has the same name but pronounces it differently. Her name is pronounced phonetically also which is the pronunciation I always get if people see it written down. As a child I made such a fuss of people mispronouncing it but by the time I went to uni I adopted the other pronunciation for ease. So basically my family and childhood friends pronounce it one way and everyone I have met in my adult life pronounces it another! Luckily I use a nickname for the most part so it hasn't been a huge issue.

I have a very common name biblical, top 5 when I was born etc and yet I still get called the wrong name, frequently at times despite correcting people. My favourites are Sandra and Tracy as neither of these bare any resemblance to my name. There is no perfect name as accents and pronunciations differ across the uk never mind the world. All you can do is keep correcting people and when your child gets older she can decide for herself.

What's the name????

Right?!!🙄

Its Helena isn't it.

Hel-uh-na vs Hel-AY-na

Ok so a name like Eleanor is pronounced differently in France to UK. I would correct people if it bothers you and when she is older she can see how she feels. She might have transitioned to Edgar by then so the decision could be out of your hands! 😉

I have a couple of friends who have this issue - a Mila (Mee-la) which is often pronounced My-la and an Eva (Ev-a) is often pronounced Ee-va.

They correct people and 99% of the time only need to do so once.

@DuchessOfSausage is there more than one way to pronounce Elodie? I only know the french pronunciation.

Anyway, OP I would just do your own thing, definitely wouldn’t change the name. Most likely people will get used to the way you pronounce it. If not, your daughter can eventually decide if to correct them or not, or she might even go by a nickname by that point. My son is called Caleb (kay-leb) and I was absolutely horrified when someone called him “kah-leb” for the first time 😂 I politely corrected it and moved on, but admittedly still internally cringe if someone pronounces it that way 🙈

"...its the UK version that seems to shorten the middle vowel. But that may just be what we are used to. Its a very nuanced difference."

My eldest DD has a name that can be pronounced in those two same ways as well, only the English (or perhaps it's American?) version is with a longer vowel sound.

Her name is Daria. In the native language of her father, this is pronounced exactly as you read it, Da-ria with a short initial "a". But I come across a lot of people pronouncing it more like Darhh-ria.

Arghh. I hear you! My baby has got a rare name which isn't phonetic and a different word and pronounced differently in the country we live in. I correct them but they get so confused. It's all on them though they are so stupid. What if he had a Vietnamese name or an Indian name? They need to get with the times. People are so basic and simple about names but honestly lots of the young adults I work with have changed their names to random words anyway. You just have to carry on with it. It's their problem. Saying something it rhymes with helps people and nips it in the bud. ' it's Aiofa rhymes with fifa.' type thing.
Also I have an unusual name and I have to help people remember but it's no problem, I'm glad it's not boring.

Does anyone else feel they need to know what the name is 🙈🤦‍♀️🤣

Interesting x

@Another2Cats That’s possibly an accent thing. I would naturally pronounce Daria with a long a, in the same way I’d pronounce Bath or grass with a long a.

I’d pronounce it im the way you want once told, though.

I would say stick with your pronunciation and correct people. That's her name.

I went to school with a girl whose name was pronounced "Care-En" but new or substitute teachers always called her Karen, which would inevitably get 35 voices shouting "It's Care-En".

In fairness, it was spelt Karen and it wasn't until I was in my mid-20s that it ever occurred to me that the pronunciation was weird!

If you're reading this Karen (Care-En) I think and have always thought that your name rocks!!!

I want to know your name now too @LeedsZebra90 aswell as the OP’s daughter’s 😄

Struggling to think of this semi-famous person and the phonetic name 🤔

I'm in the same boat OP my name is Tereza pronounced Teraza as per the Eastern European pronunciation (my mum is Czech but always get called Tureeza. My sister is Naomi (Nayomi) but so many people say Nyomi. My Brother is Ivan (E-van) but everyone says Ivan as in I've-an, but he goes by Vanya so it doesn't matter so much. Annoying but what can you do!

Anus?

Yes, you're probably right. We do live down south but I come from an area of the country with a very different pronunciation of bath, path, grass etc.

My name is often mispronounced and I've never wished my parents had changed the pronunciation or my name. My mother's name also had a pronunciation that was uncommon locally but common other places. It's never been a big deal to me... sometimes I correct people, sometimes I don't bother, and I answer to both pronunciations.

Continue to say your child's name as you intended. Politely tell others how to say it and remind close family/teachers (or other people who really matter) but don't make this a source of conflict or stress for you or your child. When she's older she can always decide to switch to the more common version and I'd support her in that, too.

Before you have a baby of your own you don't meet many people with small children, so you don't know what are the most popular current names.

I bet it's Ottilie. Never heard it here before and suddenly it's everywhere.

Ot-tee-lee on thr continent and Ottily here in the UK

My name was misprounounced my entire school life. I used a shortened version once I started working, but didn't actually like the shortened version so then changed it by deed poll by simply taking the last two letters off the name, and I've had no issues ever since. I love my name, but hated the way people pronounced it - although I can see why they did it. Basically it was a feminine spelling version of a male name (usually, although it can be either) and I now use the male version.

I know an Anais pronounce ‘Ah-nayz’ the kids call her mayonnaise 😖
I don’t actually know how it’s pronounced properly tbh. The perfume was always ah-nay ah-nay when I was in school. Noel Gallagher daughter pronounces it Ah-nay-us. So I have no idea!

Hmm my friend has this problem, she's Italian and says her name Elisa like Eh-LEE-za but some people say Elissa when they first meet her. They learn quickly though!