Mothers surname or father's

[Justcallmesarah]

Hello,

I'm pregnant with my first and only child. I'm a little uncertain about if the father and I will last and I'm wondering if I should name the baby with my surname.

Are there any implications should I do this? Like would this mean the father has limited responsibilities if it came to caring or child maintenance...

I can't see anything online that would indicate this but hoping one of you lovely lot may know more😊

If you’re questioning the relationship give the child your name

Give it your surname

The surname has no legal implications. Use whichever surname you like.

Yours
Every single time

There are no implications for this legally in terms of his ongoing responsibilities. Is he named on the birth certificate? That is more relevant.

I actually get a bit upset when I see women automatically defer to give their baby the man’s surname especially when he is barely involved or transient. You carry and nurture the baby. Share your own name.

I'm of the opinion that the baby should get its mothers surname (whether the mother has her birth name or has taken her spouses name). So even if your relationship was rock solid, baby gets whatever surname you have.

No, it doesn't affect anything. Also worth considering whether it's worth putting him on the BC too. He will owe CMS if you separate regardless.

I wanted mine for the same reason, I then felt guilty and gave my child his name again regretted it but hey he’s still around not w great dad but he’s around. It’s part of her and who she is and that’s all that matters. I wish I put my surname as a middle name because it’s his middle name and that’s the only thing id change

Give your surname! I didn't and regret it.

Give your child your surname - makes life easier for you if you end up marrying easy to change so you all have same surname rather than other way around xx

Your surname.

IF he is named on the BC and IF you go on to marry him then you can choose to change the child’s surname and BC at that point.

you would need a deed poll and the father’s permission to change it from his to yours!

How will he react to this? Will it trigger a break up if he thinks your not committed?

I have a teen and a tween. I know a hell of a lot of kids who have the surname of a man that they haven’t seen in years.

Give them your name.

Mother's. 100%.

My feeling is that I would alway want to have the same surname as my children; I double barrelled my youngest child's surname, with my surname first, as we weren't married. My eldest 2 have only my surname as their father was a waste of space and I was too young to realise.

I think all children should be given their mum's surname!

Your surname. It doesn't affect Parental responsibility or Child Maintenance but makes your life much easier if it's the same name as you.

Example, Dr's, school,passports..if you travel with different names you could face questions at passport control (happened to me).

Use your surname, if possible dont put fathers name on the certificate as this gives him paternal rights. Makes it easier to travel

Yours

No question

The only thing is if you marry someone else in the future the child will have no surname link with either parents.

Your name. It is extremely easy to change it to dads name later on if you and he stay together and that is what you both want. It is impossible to change it to yours if you split and he won’t agree.

It’s traditional for babies to have their mums name. That has really only changed in the past few decades.

Or the child's mother could choose not to take her new husbands name.

If you and DP have different names give the baby your name.

Your surname. Always the mother's.

Why would you give the child the father's surname? You're setting yourself up for potential difficulties when your surnames don't match: these aren't /likely/ or typical, but there are occasional stories about people being questioned at borders for 'is this your child?' reasons. You will throughout the child's childhood be presumed to have the surname of the child; why make that presumption be false by giving it someone else's surname?

You're going through pregnancy. You're going to have to give birth to the child. Almost certainly you're going to be its primary carer. What is the father's role, compared to that?

Easy peasy ‐your name. I love it that my DC have my name. DP doesn't give two hoots.

Mums surname is the default, its just usually same as dads if they're married!

If you think he'll be a good dad and step up, I'd double barrel. It's your child and his child. He isn't unreasonable wanting child to have his name just like you aren't wanting them to have yours.

Childs name has zero impact on parental responsibility and child maintenance etc. If it's his kids he is liable for CM, if he's on birth certificate he has responsibility.

I had no doubts about our relationship (dd is now 20 and I'm still with her Dad) but we're not married and I chose to give her my surname.

It makes no difference regarding the father's rights or responsibilities

If you have doubts then 100% the baby should have your surname.