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Baby names

Are you telling your families the name ahead of the birth...?

54 replies

vickyy · 15/02/2008 16:43

My dh's and my family are driving us nuts asking us about names, and giving us their (very strong) opinions on any name we say we're thinking about. I am getting really fed up with it.

We haven't been able to decide on a name yet, but I am worried that when we do choose one, if we tell them ahead of the birth they may put pressure on us to change it if they don't like it.

What are others doing? And are your famililes as difficult as ours... (in our case, it's made more complicated by us being a mixed race couple, so trying to find a "compromise" name - how I hate that idea...)

OP posts:

belgo · 15/02/2008 16:44

don't tell them the name you are thinking of. Tell them another name, that you know you won't choose.It's none of their business until the birth


LadyOfWaffle · 15/02/2008 16:45

I have told them some potential names, but, it's hard to pick a definate one before you see the baby anyway I found. I doubt anyone could put me off a name I really liked though TBH.


collision · 15/02/2008 16:46

My family are using 'decoy' names to keep the family quiet.

So, if you like the name George for a boy, you say you are thinking of Lewis or Bradley.

If you like the name Ruby for a girl, you say you are thinking of Jasmine or Aleisha.

This way everyone can have an opinion, you dont give a toss what they think and you can name your baby George or Ruby and everyone is happy.

Do not, I repeat, DO NOT tell anyone the real names you are thinking about.

We have lots of names flying around atm as all 3 of my SILs are pregnant and due in March!!


OliviaMumsnet · 15/02/2008 16:49

God no! Much harder for them to be opinionated when you say, it's a girl and we've called her xxxx.
That is my plan and I'm sticking to it.
Though I have been using decoys like collision and coming up with amusing porn-star sounding suggestions to keep them on their toes!


stleger · 15/02/2008 16:55

And put a birth announcement in the paper, or register the name before you tell them...


Onlyaphase · 15/02/2008 16:58

We didn't tell the family the names we had chosen, despite strong pressure from MIL as she is the sort of person who likes to know things like that. Made life much easier.

NB if using this plan, make sure husband knows how you are spelling said name before letting him send out text messages announcing DDs birth. Awful that he spelt my favourite (unusual) name incorrectly!


FrannyandZooey · 15/02/2008 17:00

NONONO do NOT tell them - don't tell ANYONE

tell them you have chosen a name (might shut them up making suggestions the whole time) but that you are keeping it as a surprise

or just say "thanks we prefer to make this decision between dh and I but you will all know soon enough when the baby is born!"


PurlyQueen · 15/02/2008 17:04

If any friends/ relatives/colleagues ask me, I just say that we haven't come up with any names yet as I am not interested in any comments/opinions from others


Califrau · 15/02/2008 17:07

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

sweetkitty · 15/02/2008 17:11



lollipopmother · 15/02/2008 17:30

We might tell people, I'm not sure, if we do any people think they can put their two pence worth in I shall be telling everyone to feck off, I'm not changing our names for the world, no amount of pressure would make me cave anyway as the names aren't unusual names that you've got to worry about.


susiemj · 15/02/2008 17:35

Do not tell! I completely changed my mind when I saw dd anyway.


CristinaTheAstonishing · 15/02/2008 19:11

We told everyone the name we thought we wanted for DS (Tudor). We changed it a week before he was born. One of my friends had cautioned me that Tudor is pronounced more like "chew-door" in English but that wasn't the reason, we just thought Dominic was nicer.

We told people the name for DD1 and I couldn't care less if anyone disagreed, we liked it. We didn't tell DD2's name as we decided v late, but we did tell the names we were considering. I must have very open-minded family & friends, or maybe i'm too thick-skinned to notice any sniggering or care about it.


hunkermunker · 15/02/2008 19:13

It's not a committee decision, naming a baby.

Tell your family you've decided on Elvis for a boy and Priscilla for a girl and get on with making the decision by yourselves.


hunkermunker · 15/02/2008 19:14

Mind you, I had, "Hmm" and then "It'll grow on me" as responses to DS1's name...after he was born.


CristinaTheAstonishing · 15/02/2008 19:15

I know of a little Elvis. He's about 4 now.


vickyy · 15/02/2008 19:15

Think I've made a tactical error telling them our ideas... I've been too worried about being honest with them. I feel much better having read all these responses and will no longer be guilt ridden if I don't tell them what we've thinking!

So I am going to shut up for the next 7 weeks or so (and - a bit harder - get dh to do likewise), and tell them the name will be a surprise.

We haven't even decided ourselves yet anyway - we're down to 2 names, and maybe we'll end up leaving the decision till after he arrives.

OP posts:

hunkermunker · 15/02/2008 19:16

Cristina, I really like the name Elvis


VictorianSqualor · 15/02/2008 19:18

I like Elvis too, we called our lizard it instead of a child though.


Pruners · 15/02/2008 19:19

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hatrick · 15/02/2008 19:19

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hunkermunker · 15/02/2008 19:19

I'm tempted to tell DH that we can only get a cat if it's called Elvis. Or Dave. Or Sanjay.


hunkermunker · 15/02/2008 19:20

We actually didn't have a name for DS2 until he was a day old. So that sorted that one


Pruners · 15/02/2008 19:21

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hatrick · 15/02/2008 19:21

This reply has been deleted

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