AIBU not honouring dead family with name

[yippieplubath]

friend's FIL lets call him Rodger died with friends DH was a teen. When friend was pregnant with a boy her DH was adamant that he wanted to honour his father with the name Rodger.

Friend felt it was offencive to say that she didn't like the name so came up with many more but her DH kept saying that it was really important for him to honour his father. The DH didn't place any value on middle names so didn't want it to be the middle name and was very happy for his wife to choose middle names of this child and the first names of any following child. The DH is a very nice man if this is relevant and this was something that made him feel closer to his father and that he really cared about.

The name isn't Rodger but its very similar and a little old fashioned. Friend didn't hate the name at all but didn't want to call her child this name and really wanted an unusual name.

If this was me I would have vetoed the name in a respectful name. For me I would want my child to have a first and second name that I really liked. Would this make me a raging bitch?

Baby Rodger is now 4

I would’ve pushed a bit harder for a middle name. Two of my immediate family members died in the last couple of years and i will give their names as middle names to my children depending on sex. However, my mum had a clunky, old fashioned name that I’m not a fan of so if it’s a girl am using a name she went by less frequently as a middle name. She also wanted to call me Anna and regretted the decision not to and never went on to have another girl. She was very vocal about this and a few family members have suggested calling the baby Anna, mum’s name as middle name to honour her. Anna’s a lovely name and is very similar to my mil’s name but I want a name of my own for this baby! Saying that, if I was in your friend’s position it would be hard not to acknowledge my husband’s grief if that’s what he really had his heart set on. Could only hope that a nn could be agreed as a compromise.

Raymond - like it, Ray is cool
Robert - like it, friend's DS is called Robert, like Rob, Robbie as nn
Roland - like it, and Roly
Randall - ok as a surname or middle name

MIL dictating name - dislike