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Baby names

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Original poster

Hubby doesn't want the name I do

52 replies

ilovemykids5 · 02/08/2019 11:01

As soon as I found out I was having a girl I thought of a name and loved it. Told husband and he said think of something else. Now I've lost all interest. My other daughters keep saying names and I hate them and hubby's like yeah there nice. I've just got my heart set on the name.

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Original poster
ilovemykids5 · 02/08/2019 11:03

Also need to add that my daughters both disagree on names as well so nobody's happy and they argue about them.

OP posts:
Otterseatpuffinsdontthey · 02/08/2019 11:04

Needs to be a name you and your DH both like.

Pineapplefish · 02/08/2019 11:05

You need to find a name that you can both agree on. Sorry OP, but he's allowed to veto a name you love! Maybe both make a list of your top 10 and see if there are any that appear on both lists?

99bb · 02/08/2019 11:05

I think you have to exclude anything either of you actively dislikes

Okbutwhy · 02/08/2019 11:06

What's the name?

PixieLumos · 02/08/2019 11:07

Tough I’m afraid, you will need to compromise on this one (with your husband - I don’t think your daughter’s approval is crucial here). DH vetoed a few names I liked and I some of his, we eventually agreed on one we both liked. Could you agree to have the name you prefer as a middle name?

AdelaideK · 02/08/2019 11:09

You need a name you both like. Can you use your favourite name as a middle name?

sidonie1 · 02/08/2019 11:27

I had this with all our children’s names. I think it’s part of the process for many people. You just keep going until you find one you and your husband agree on.

Annoying, but part of the partnership!

yikesanotherbooboo · 02/08/2019 11:29

There are thousands of names anyone of which will suit your baby when they arrive but you have to agree with your DH on the choice.try to move your head on from this and start making lists!

Original poster
ilovemykids5 · 02/08/2019 11:35

He only dislikes the name because it makes him think of a certain person whos irrelevant.

OP posts:
Lllot5 · 02/08/2019 11:37

Well you’ve both got to like it I think. Must be one you both like surely.

PixieLumos · 02/08/2019 11:37

I think that’s quite a valid reason to dislike a name tbh

Courtney555 · 02/08/2019 11:38

If he doesn't like it because it's a link to someone that he associates presumably something negative with, then it's not irrelevant to him. You can't have the name, sorry.

whatausername · 02/08/2019 11:38

It doesn't matter, he still doesn't like it so you'll need to have a look. There are websites such as Named Together which might help.

ThroughThickAndThin01 · 02/08/2019 11:39

He shouldn’t have to call his daughter a name he dislikes. Keep looking. And it’s yours and his choice, not existing daughters.

AudacityOfHope · 02/08/2019 11:40

But the person clearly isn't irrelevant to him!

You'll have to keep looking I'm afraid. Although I'd take your daughters out of the equation.

MamaOfBothTeams · 02/08/2019 11:44

What's the name? Maybe we could suggest similar

Solonelywastheballard · 02/08/2019 11:48

With DS it took ages to agree on a name.

With DD I had a name that I'd had my heart set on since I was a teenager. Dh wasn't keen but there was no debate. I didn't let him have an input. Now she's here he's happy with it.

I think sometimes you can override dh opinion if you really really like it and he's just not keen.

Original poster
ilovemykids5 · 02/08/2019 11:49

It's a famous person so it shouldn't even bother him.

OP posts:
LadyPenelope68 · 02/08/2019 11:50

Whether you think his reasons are irrelevant or not, he has just as much say as you do, you need to find a name you agree on. Stop being so selfish.

notangelinajolie · 02/08/2019 11:51

Who wants the name more? I didn't like DH's choice for our first baby but he loved it so much that I agreed as long as I got to choose the next one. Which I did Smile

BruceAndNosh · 02/08/2019 11:52

Don't call your baby Mollie-Mae

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 02/08/2019 11:52

He shouldn’t have to call his daughter a name he dislikes. Keep looking. And it’s yours and his choice, not existing daughters.

This. It must be horrible having to call and refer to one of the few people you love most in the world by a name that you hate. OK, you might end up marrying somebody whose name you hate too, but you had no choice in that.

I think it's nice to ask existing children what names they like, but don't set too much store by them. Depending on their age, the child could end up being called PooWillyBumBum or named after the flavour-of-the-week pop star with a stupid 'funky' name. I remember seeing a thread where parents had, for some insane reason, given their existing daughter free rein to call her newborn sister whatever she liked and she chose to pay tribute to her favourite Tellytubby Laa-Laa!!

PixieLumos · 02/08/2019 11:52

Famous person - is it quite a distinctive name? Maybe he’s not keen on the association.

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 02/08/2019 11:59

I think sometimes you can override dh opinion if you really really like it and he's just not keen.

He still needs to give his blessing to your doing that - it's a joint decision.

I don't like the use of the word 'override' at all as it's controlling and can lead to "I carried her for 9 months and gave birth to her, so I get the final say on her name" countered with "Well, I'm the main breadwinner and you'll be on ML anyway, so I get to choose how we spend our money." It's not how a healthy partnership works.

Nothing wrong with trying to persuade him, though, if he has no particular opinions one way or the other; but as Chris Tarrant would have said, you really do need to ask him to confirm his 'final answer'.