Too try hard.

[Tillygetsit]

I'm sorry but I've gritted my teeth long enough! I've read 3 posts today where OPs have been told that the names they have chosen are too try hard. What does that mean? Surely we all try hard to find the perfect name. Does it mean pretentious and posters cant spell that?! Sorry to he goady but it's so irritating.

That's interesting, Josepheen. I had my son abroad, and haven't lived in Ireland since though we're likely to go back within the next year or two and gaelscoilleanna will be debarred, as DS has only really heard Irish if DH and I are hissing something surreptitious at one another in it (we're both rusty, though me less so because I lived in the Gaeltacht for a bit in the early 2000s.) And while we're educated, we're definitely not middle-class.

I can't remember what the cut-off age is for a child to transfer into an Irish school and be excused from Irish? I'd be sad, as I'd love DS to learn it.

Look at Rees-Mogg’s kids, for example. Sixtus. I mean ffs, if my next door neighbour called her kid Sixtus I would think ‘try hard’.

For a 6th child I think Sixtus is cool! But if you feel the need to think 'FFS' that says more about you.

Shouldn't we all be encouraging more name diversity? Names are meant to identify us, the more variety the easier and more interesting this becomes.

Sixtus isn't try hard, it's can't be arsed to think of a name for the sixth child, or can't count it's try a bit harder ...

Some names are daft, ridiculous, regardless of who you are. Apple, Blanket, Princess Banana Hammock, Zippety-Dodah, Zgrucstkhepyz pronounced Fred, Maverick, Saber. Not try hard except trying hard to be different for differences sake and sod the poor human saddled with the stupid name.

tiramisu1 why should we be encouraging name diversity exactly? Obviously a range of names are needed, but there are a range of names. Giving a child a name with an invented spelling, or something that you know that they'll spend their life spelling out and correcting everyone about is just cruel to the poor kid who has to bear the name, and setting yourself up for many opportunities to post "aibu to be raging that everyone gets DD/DS's name wrong?" on MN, until the day you post "AIBU to be hurt and in tears that Luisant-Jablka Agnelia Morning Star has instructed everyone at her new school to call her Lucy and won't answer to the name I gave her?"

Sixtus is even more annoying than it seems - it's unrelated to the Roman name Sextus ('sixth'), it's a Latinised version of a totally different Greek name. It's clearly so that JRM can catch people out and show how clever he is when people assume it means 'sixth child'...

So, yes, probably fairly try-hard in his case gah.

Tbh I wish more people from council estates in Croydon would call their children Augustus or Rupert...

SundayMorningSun in that case it's absolute try hard wankery of the highest order, and exactly what is wrong with try hard names - they're not about the child, they're about the parent, and they don't achieve what they're trying hard to achieve (making JRM look clever) they make him look like a wanker using his child's name as a weird way to score cheap points or make a joke!

But I imagine Sixtus is primarily for the ghastly JR-M a way of stamping his nasty brand of reactionary Catholicism on his child especially given his other names, and his siblings' names partly to make sure his child isn't mixed up with bog Irish Catholics like me. (He is far from a joke -- his voting record is disgusting.)

I hope little Sixtus will kick over nominative determinism, change his name to Ernesto 'Che' Mogg, get a lot of neck tattoos and sell the Socialist Worker Party paper in Parliament Square.

when perfectly ordinary people choose names which sound incredibly posh to my ear. Look at Rees-Mogg’s kids, for example. Sixtus
Can you give an example that isn't a stupid name given by an idiot?

Fucking hate people that use name examples when being offensive. Name your kids whatever you like. You mught win the lottery then the apparently 'posh' name will be quite fitting or the apparently 'chavy' name might stand out. Does my head in. Stop being so fucking rude about kids names... its like a load of Katie Hopkins followers on here sometimes

Mum, you might want to step away from the baby names forum, then, given that it exists precisely for people to ask for frank, anonymous opinions on names.

@leelawadee this was on 'active' tab. People can have an opinion but dont be so rude using example i.e the person who said about augustus and rupert on a croydon council estate.

Then, mum, if you're new to the baby names forum, why not think about why it exists? No one is insulting your little Rupert or Augustus to their faces. That would be rude. The point of the forum is to get uncensored opinions from anonymous internet strangers, rather than family and friends who may be too polite to be frank -- and that involves giving specific names.

Yes, it's rude to criticise someone's name in their face.

But it's narrow minded to make fun of peoples' names just because they're a different style than what they would choose.

Why shouldn't council house families call their kids Rupert? Why shouldn't non Irish families call their daughter Niamh? And why should JRM not call his son Sixtus rather than say Steve or Sam?

I'm all for name diversity! Makes life much more interesting. Also, kids are much more accepting of different names than some Aston here!

Sorry, some adults on here!

Niamh isn’t hard to pronounce even if you’re reading using English phonetics. You’re still going to get pretty close. How do you pronounce it? I read it as 'Neem' or 'Niam' which I know isn't right.

Nesssie its pronounced 'neeve'. Thank you Sparkly, i agree with you!
Lee, all im saying is dont be so bloody rude about it, making a corrolation between a childs name and their social status is rude, no matter who youre saying it to

Names that are too 'try hard', for me might include names that are trying to be very fashionable / modern, overly complicated, or pretentious. Sometimes it just seems OTT or out of place.

But Mum you're entirely missing the point of the names board.

If I ask someone in real life if thry like the name Xavier, they're either going to be polite or piss me off. So instead you ask randomers on the Internet who can be brutally honest without causing offence because they're only answering what you asked.

If you're going to ask "is Poseidon cool for a girl" and get offended if people say no, don't ask

Names that are too 'try hard', for me might include names that are trying to be very fashionable / modern, overly complicated, or pretentious

What does that actually mean?

Fashionable names are by definition top 10 names!

What's the problem with 'modern' names?

What's an example of an 'overly complicated' name? A foreign one?

What exactly does 'pretentious' mean? Pretending to be what?

I honestly don't get these issues implying that parents are 'trying too hard'

Lee, all im saying is dont be so bloody rude about it, making a corrolation between a childs name and their social status is rude, no matter who youre saying it to

Well, for a start I did not make that statement, and quite a few posters have queried the poster who did as to why someone on a Croydon council estate should be prevented from calling their child Augustus or Rupert, if that's what they like.

I think people should call their children what they like, and get a bit bored with the 'Keep Your Head Down, Nice Safe Name Like Jack and Sophie, Otherwise People Will Think You Are Pretentious' brigade.

But and I say this as a foreigner from somewhere with a less pronounced class system the UK is an incredibly class-conscious society, so yes, names have connotations with certain social statuses, just as much as what you call the room you sit and relax in, or the name you give your evening meal.

Sometimes every 'normal' name (particularly boys' names) has connotations you don't really like due to your brain's habit of linking words together or associations with loads of people you've met.
Give me nearly any boy's name and I could tell you why I don't like it enough!

So you need to find one with no connotations whatsoever that doesn't sound pretentious or too common!

People post on this board because they want to know the connotations and associates others might have with a name. They want the opinions which would be "bloody rude" to point out once someone has already named a child!

People who get offended and try to goad others into being very blunt are being deliberatelydeliberately disingenuous in order to enjoy a bit of righteous indignation and finger pointing.

As I said above we can pretend names don't bring with them baggage in the form of associations - some with famous people or fictional characters or songs, some with pets, some just word association or unfortunate rhymes or puns, some with people we knew at school and yes, some stereotypes of class and probably other stereotypes (old fashioned, naughty, fussy, adventurous, try hard, hipster, old hippie, whatever).

Mentioning the stereotype might offend someone, but it's best to avoid this board in that case. It's rubbish on a societal level that stereotypes exist, but they do, and some people want to know what others will groundlessly assume or picture when if they choose a certain name.

I agree, op. Most posters' 'definitions' of 'try hard' give me the impression of their own narrow mindedness.

Personally I love meeting people with interesting or unusual names!

Associations not associates