Can we triple barrel our child's name?

[TooManySurnames]

Ok, before I start, last time I did a thread it got picked up by journos so, just in case: please fuck off lazy journo twats.

Right. I have a single 2 syllable surname, lets say "Austen". My partner has a 3-2 syllable double barrelled name, with the first part being relevant to his heritage, say "González-Peters". We both want to share our surnames with our child, and neither of us are willing to change or drop our names, so we're in a stand off. I think he should give the first part of his name as a middle name, and double barrel the rest with mine:

[John] [González] [Peters-Austen]

He think's we should use both names as surnames, but without hyphenating:

[John] [González-Peters Austen]/ [Austen González-Peters]

I think 3 names is too much to saddle a child with, especially when part of it is already hard to spell/ pronounce. He says that it's not 3 names, it's 2, i.e. his name is not "González"+"Peters", its "González-Peters". If we were Peters-Austen then our child would have his fathers name and my name, but not his name. I can see his logic but I still think it's too much, you can't just keep adding names forever!

I'm putting it to the MN jury, and also open to alternative solutions. Will probably show him this thread.

Three is too many. Your solution of putting one of his surnames as a middle name is eminently sensible.

I agree 3 is too much.
Can you not use the culturally relevant part of his name plus yours? Ie. Gonzalez-Austen

Seriously suggest to your DP that you all go triple barrelled and see what he says.

It’s ridiculous to lumber someone with three surnames, and I say that as someone who chose a very complicated non-English surname to double barrel with on marriage.

Ask him are you naming a child or a firm of solicitors?

I'm not sure what you're solution is but I agree, 3 surnames is far too many. I knew a boy at school with two first names and a long double barrelled surname and it was frequently commented on/laughed at at awards evenings and prize givings etc.

Giving a child 3 surnames is a burden, don't do it!

González-Austen would be lovely, I just thought using it as a middle name would help preserve the original "flow" of the name since it comes first atm. I wouldn't even be adverse to using it informally, but with formal documents they'd have a simpler legal name.

My partner genuinely think's it'll be fine to use all 3 names. There's a precedent for doing so in his/ his mum's culture, and he's worried the parent who's name is dropped will be upset and offended (though he has agreed to actually ask them rather than just assuming).

We have lots of double, double barrelled children in my school. Think 'Rosie-Mae Smith-Yates. Sounds like the cast of Tom Browns schooldays

Oh really, that's interesting Soontobe60! I've never known anyone have anything more than double-barrelled

I'm British and moved to America 10 years ago. Please don't give your child 3 last names! Having two middle names was an absolute nightmare on paper and I can't even imagine that issue with a last name. I understand wanting to keep your heritage but that can only be to a point...what if your DC marries someone with a double barreled name; should they have 5 last names!?

I know there's a family called the Anstruther-Gough-Calthorpe. Would a name that long even fit on bank cards?

We have lots of double, double barrelled children in my school. Think 'Rosie-Mae Smith-Yates.

That's not a double double-barrelled name, it's a hyphenated forename and a double barrelled surname.

The only triple-barrelled surname I can ever remember hearing is Sir Ranulph Twisleton-Wykeham-Fiennes ...Ralph Fiennes is actually Ralph Nathaniel Twisleton-Wykeham-Fiennes come to think but they obviously just use the Fiennes bit in normal use. (quite funny that He Who Must Not Be Named has such an excessive name)

Anyway... 3 is a bit much, maybe you could put the whole lot on the birth certificate González-Peters Austen but follow this example and just use Austen normally.

And what happens when your dc gets married or has dc

3 is ridiculous - but then I think double barrel surnames are as well.

My Spanish friend has literally about 6 (possibly more) second/middle names as they take all the grandparents names also. I think it's nice. People don't really call others by your whole first and second name anyway unless at school. Even then you can choose how they use the name. I think 3 is fine.

I like it!

The only people I have met with triple barrelled names are super posh. I think it’s fine to use though. And ignore all the Mumsnetters who say your DC will be teased, all of mine have unusual names and have never been teased.

I think 3 is too much. I really like your idea, I think it’s fair.

yep, you're right. Three names is too much. Think of the extra stress at exam times! Also I don't think computers will cope, some have trouble with my two middle names.
Sam Taylor-Johnson was Sam Taylor-Wood before she married Aaron Johnson, and they both took the name Taylor-Johnson when they married.
so Baby Gonzalez-Austen.

There is an upper class family in this country with a triple-barrelled surname: Anstruther-Gough-Calthorpe (en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Anstruther-Gough-Calthorpe).

It's very unusual to have a triple-barrelled name though in this country and I wouldn't saddle any children with one, so what would be the point? Just pick 2, max. If your DH is of Spanish background, so that his surname is his dad's then his mum's, then the "traditional" approach would be to put his dad's surname first, then your maiden name, and lose his mother's (but you could give his mother's surname as an extra middle name to any children).

Can you not use the culturally relevant part of his name plus yours? Ie. Gonzalez-Austen

I was going to suggest that as well.

Try combining - a friend combined Smith and Good and became Goodsmiths

Gonzalez Peters Austen for example could be:
Austers-Gonzalez

Austen-Petalez

If it’s at all possible with your actual 3 names then making one would be ideal as double barrelled kids often drop one anyway - for instance with these 3 it would be something like Austenalez

Use one part of his surname and hyphenate it with yours then could you use the second part of his name as a middle name eg Instead of Peters use Peter or Petra if his actual name would work?

I'd much prefer 3 than a collaboration of the names pushed together. I'm just imagining the picture I would build of a person based from their CV, for example. The 3 barrelled name would immediately make me think of public school boys, a made up mashed together name would make me think local comp. I don't say that in a disrespectful way please don't get me wrong.

I've taken my maiden name as a middle name on marriage and it causes no end of confusion in England. People tend to double barrel it with my surname but then it isn't a name that would be used as a forename so I can understand the confusion!

I’d go with father’s first surname, mother’s first surname as per Spanish tradition and use the Peters part as some form of given name for a nod to the Grandparent who’s left out, but only if that really was going to upset someone because that leaves one maternal grandparent still left out. Thinking of other people’s sensitivity could land the poor child with the longest name ever 😏

Surely the simple rule when naming a child is that the child is more important than the parents, grandparents or anyone else.

We have already done this (I'm taking his name to make three)
Mine will be, let's say, A Gonzales Peters-Austen and my child will have a second middle name too of Austen but on a school register it'll come through as Peters-Austen - does this make any sense haha